jump to navigation

Shy & Fearless ‘Round Midnight (give or take 12 hours) April 25, 2020

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Uncategorized.
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

(“Ramadan Mubarak, Blessed Ramadan!” to anyone who is observing Ramadan. I typically talk about Ramadan at the end of the season, so keep your eyes open.)

Yoga Sutra 2.17: draşțŗdŗśyayoh samyogo heyahetuh

– “The union of the seer and the seeable is the cause of pain (that may be avoidable).”

It is a little overwhelming to reach a certain point in a challenging climb, to look out and realize how far you’ve come, and then to look forward and realize you may not be ready for the last little bit that takes you to the peak. Do you go back? Do you climb on? Do you stand in one spot, paralyzed by indecision? Do you regret or celebrate? Do you fear or persevere?

These are the questions we all ask ourselves at some point in our lives – and sometimes at multiple times in our lives. These were questions I found myself asking as I prepared for Saturday’s class and realized that perhaps I had not prepared the regulars for what was about to come. These were also the questions (or some variation of the questions) a young Ella Fitzgerald asked herself as she stood on the Apollo Theater stage during one of the early Amateur Nights.

Born today (April 25th) in 1917, Fitzgerald would eventually become a bandleader known as the First Lady of Jazz, Mama of Jazz, Lady Ella, and the Queen of Jazz. She would be championed by musicians like Benny Carter and Chick Webb (who gave her one of her big shots); composers like Ira Gershwin (who once said, “I never knew how good our songs were until I heard Ella Fitzgerald sing them”); and celebrities like Marilyn Monroe and Frank Sinatra (both of whom challenged segregation laws and racial bias, in their own ways, on Ella’s behalf). She would be heralded by universities and heads of state, awarded the National Medal of Arts (by President Ronald Reagan in 1987), and presented France’s Commander of Arts and Letters award in 1990.

On November 21, 1934, however, when she stood on the stage at the Apollo, Ella Fitzgerald was just a shy, reserved, self-conscious 17-year old orphan with a reportedly disheveled appearance.  She hadn’t become a legendary scat artist, hadn’t recorded a single song (let alone over 200 albums) and hadn’t performed at Carnegie Hall once (let along 26 times). In fact, the woman who would eventually be known for her ability to mimic any horn in the orchestra wasn’t even planning to sing!

“They were the dancingest sisters around.”

– Ella Fitzgerald describing Ruth and Louise Edwards (known as the Edwards Sisters)

Yes, you read that right: Ella Fitzgerald didn’t enter the Apollo’s Amateur Night as a singer. She intended to dance. The problem was the main event concluded with the Edwards Sisters, a crowd favorite. Seeing the Edwards Sisters’ tap dancing bring the house down – and knowing the critical (and vocal) reputation of the Apollo audience – young Ella froze, and asked herself some variation of those aforementioned questions.

“Once up there, I felt the acceptance and love from my audience. I knew I wanted to sing before people the rest of my life.”

– Ella Fitzgerald on how it felt after she sang one of her mother’s favorite songs at the Apollo

It’s a weird dichotomy to think of Ella Fitzgerald as both shy and fearless; yet, that is exactly who and what she was. Out of context it sounds odd. When you know more of her story, however, it is inspiring and encouraging. After all, every one of us can make the decision to climb on, to celebrate, and to persevere. All we need is to recognize what is already inside of us, what has gotten us this far. At the same time, what has gotten us this far is also what might have us giving up and turning back. The path forward is also the path back.

 “The uninformed, not mature, think these two paths – renunciation/contemplation (sankhya yoga) and action (karma yoga) – lead to different results, but that is not true. They are essentially the same, compare them.

Right knowing or wisdom (jnana yoga) leads to right doing. Right doing (karma yoga) gives rise to right knowing. Take either path to the very end and they meet. At that place the contemplative seeker of knowledge greets the person of action, and they are both equally free from the cycle of birth and death. The person who knows this oneness of paths really knows the Truth.”

The Bhagavid Gita: A Walkthrough for Westerners (5:4 – 5:6), by Jack Hawley

 “The [state of] realization gained through the practice of Sankhya can also be gained through the practice of Yoga. An aspirant fully established in one attains the fruits of both.”


The Bhagavid Gita (5:6), alternate translation by Pandit Rajmani Tigunait

In that moment of questioning, young Ella’s consciousness, her awareness of herself and her awareness of what she could do, merged with all the possible outcomes and in that moment there was fear of failing on the stage and also, as a teenager already taking care of herself in the world, there was the fear of failing in life. So, there was suffering – and, in this case, (mental) suffering that could also lead to (physical) pain. In that same moment, she also recognized a way to succeed and to alleviate (or avoid) some of her suffering.

This takes us back to Schrödinger’s Cat and the Emperor Marcus Aurelius saying that “the obstacle is the way.” It also moves us forward into this week’s sutra.

If you’re interested in a little fearless play (and contemplation) to celebrate Ella Fitzgerald’s birthday, please join me today (Saturday, April 25th) at 12 Noon, for a virtual yoga practice on Zoom. Some of the new Zoom security protocols have definitely kicking in; so, please use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems. Saturday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.

Don’t forget to fearlessly Kiss My Asana!!

The Kiss My Asana livestream, all-humanity, Kick-Off gathering is also today (Saturday, April 25th) at 10 AM!! Mind Body Solutions founder Matthew Sanford will share his insights into the practice, plus there will be live conversation with MBS students and mind-body practices for all. Get a glimpse into the work, the people, and the humanity of the adaptive yoga program and help raise $50K of essential support.

Kiss My Asana is the annual yogathon that benefits Mind Body Solutions, which was founded by Matthew Sanford to help those who have experienced trauma, loss, and disability find new ways to live by integrating both mind and body. Known for their adaptive yoga classes, MBS provides “traditional yoga” classes, workshops, and outreach programs. They also train yoga teachers and offer highly specialized training for health care professionals. This year’s yogathon, the 7th annual yogathon, is only a week long. Seven days, starting tomorrow (Saturday), to do yoga, share yoga, and help others.  By participating in the Kiss My Asana yogathon you join a global movement, but in a personal way. In other words, you practice yoga… for 7 days.

The yogathon raises resources and awareness. So, my goal this year is to tell 7 stories in 7 days and raise $600 for Mind Body Solutions. You can do yoga starting Saturday. (I am still hosting my Zoom classes on Saturday and Sunday, so consider doing all three!) You can share yoga be inviting a friend to one of my classes or by forwarding one of the blog posts. You can help others by donating or, if you are not able to donate, come to class Saturday – Wednesday (or request a class you can do on your own) and practice the story poses on Thursday and Friday so that I can make a donation on your behalf.

You can add 5 minutes of yoga (or meditation) to your day; you can learn something new about your practice; or even teach a pose to someone close to you – or even to one of your Master Teachers/Precious Jewels.

To give you some ideas about how you can spend this week, consider that in past years my KMA offerings have included donation-based classes and (sometimes) daily postings. Check out one of my previous offerings dated April 25th (or thereabouts):

30 Poses in 30 Days (scroll down to see April 25th)

A Musical Preview (scroll down to see March 25th)

A 5-Minute Practice

5 Questions Answered by Yogis

Answers to Yogis Questions

Psst…Ella’s story is my first KMA offering. So far I only have one yogi submitted story, which means I need 5 more. Please tell me your story!



No comments yet — be the first.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: