Your Terms/Causes & Conditions of Happiness & FTWMI: “Be Happy, Now!” (a 2-for-1 “missing” Saturday & Monday post w/ excerpts) October 21, 2024

“Chag sameach!” to those celebrating Sukkot! Many blessings to everyone and especially to anyone grateful for friendship, peace, freedom, understanding, and wisdom.

Stay safe! Live well! Hydrate and nourish your heart, body, and mind.

This 2-for-2 post is the “missing” post for Saturday, October 19^th, and the post-practice post related to the practice on Monday, October 21^st. The 2024 prompt question on Monday was two-fold, “What is something or someone from your past and/or present for which you are grateful? What is a future something or someone for which you will be grateful?”  This post contains some previously posted content. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

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“And they have made us Liars. We cannot tell the truth anymore. You cannot reprimand your children.

[In adult voice] ‘No Jonny, you said you you didn’t have a biscuit, but there’s crumbs on your face and you did have a biscuit. You have lied.’

[In kid voice] ‘But you said you had read the terms and conditions when you ticked that box. It’s too quick for you to read the terms and conditions. You read it and [makes the sounds of fast moving text].’

The truth is no one in this room has read the terms and conditions. No one in New York has read the terms and conditions. No one in the Universe — Even God has not read the terms and conditions….”

— quoted from Eddie Izzard: Live at Madison Square Garden (part of the “Stripped” tour) by Eddie Izzard

Any time we update something, start using a new app, or sign a contract for something, we have to acknowledge the “Terms and Conditions” provided in the agreement. We may not always read the fine print, but there is something explicitly laid out that defines expectations and consequences. In life, we don’t always have things explicitly outlined; but, the terms and conditions still exist. In Buddhism and in the Yoga Philosophy, we think of them as causes and conditions.

I have heard the Buddha discussed pratītyasamutpāda, which can be translated into English as “dependent origination”, or “dependent arising”; indicating that “if this exists, that exists; if this ceases to exist, that also ceases to exist”. Here, “this” can be a grain (or direction) of suffering and/or a grain (or direction) of wisdom. A similar rubric is outlined in the second section of the Yoga Sūtras, where Patanjali described how afflicted/dysfunctional and not-afflicted/functional thought patterns (kliṣṭākliṣṭāḥ) are like planted seeds that can lead to pain or pleasure. In both philosophies, the path to ending the causes and conditions of suffering includes meditation and right/skillful/functional thoughts, words, and deeds.

In the absence of the formal practice, both philosophies encourage cultivating the opposite.

“Now I’m allowing myself to lose my inner peace and happiness. This is a much greater loss than losing a portion of my material wealth. Furthermore, such occurrences are commonplace. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. In worldly matters I will do what needs to be done, but never at the cost of losing the pristine nature of my mind. I must adhere to the higher virtues of my heart.”

— commentary on Yoga Sūtra 2.33 from The Practice of the Yoga Sutra: Sadhana Pada by Pandit Rajmani Tigunait, PhD

Another way to think of these terms and conditions is simply as cause and effect — which includes the consequences of our actions, as well as expectations that arise from previous experiences. Some of our expectations are based on our direct lived experiences and some are based on the expectations of other people’s experiences. All of these expectations make up our conditioning. One of the intentions behind the 2024 Saturday practices has been to take a look at our conditioning; to bring awareness to our saṃskāra (“mental impression”) and vāsanā (a literal “dwelling” place of our habits); and to notice some of the reasons why we think, speak, and do as we do.

Once we bring awareness to our conditioning, we can start contemplating future conditioning: which seeds we want to plant and which habits we want to cultivate. However, the ultimate goal of all these practices is to find the state of mind that leads to less suffering. In Buddhism, the ultimate goal is nirvāṇa (or nibbāna, in Pali). In the Yoga Sūtra 4.29, Patanjali described a particular experience of samādhiḥ as “a cloud of virtue”. Either way you think of it, less suffering means… more happiness (whatever that means to you at this moment).

For some people, “the state of being happy” is an ecstatic kind of joy; for others it is “not being miserable”; and then there is everything in between. Both Yoga and Buddhism feature practices centered around happiness. For example, the second niyama (internal observation in the Yoga Philosophy) is santosha, the practice of contentment. In Tibetan Buddhism, one of the lojong (“mind training”) techniques is “Always maintain only a joyful mind.” (#21) Again, these are practices; the jumping off points for meditation and contemplation.

What if, however, you were commanded to be happy?

FTWMI: The following is a revised/updated version of a 2020 post entitled “Be Happy, Now!”

“Be joyful at your festival – you and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maid-servant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow who live within your city.

For seven days you must celebrate the Festival to YHVH*, your God, in the place which YHVH* shall choose, because the Lord, your God, will bless you in all your produce, and in all the work of your hands, and you will only be happy.”

(*NOTE: YHVH is commonly translated as “the Lord” in English.)

— quoted from Devarim  – Deuteronomy (16:14 – 15)

In the Torah (and the Christian Old Testament), there are a list of commandments. Mixed into that list are certain dates the faithful are commanded to observe. We think of them, in the modern context, as “holidays” and they are filled with ritual and tradition. Sometimes the mandate is general and left to interpretation (like when it says in Deuteronomy, “‘… and they shall not appear before the Lord empty: Every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the Lord thy God which he hath given thee.’” Other times, however, it is very specific about who, what, when, and even where. Sukkot, the “Festival (or Feast) of the Tabernacles (or Booths)” is one of the times where the details are specific — even when they appear vague.

For seven days, 8 in the diaspora, people within the Jewish community and people who observe the commanded holidays, eat, sleep, socialize, and sometimes work in a temporary shelter. The shelter, a sukkah, consists of three walls of any material and a roof made of natural fiber. (Natural being something grown from the earth.) In 2020, when the pandemic created so many obstacles to the ways in which people typically observed and practiced their faith here, finally, was a time when there was less challenge. Yes, true, it was still best for people [around this time in 2020] to socially distance, wear masks, wash your hands, and avoid big gatherings — but, it was also best (when gathering) to be outdoors. It’s like Sukkot was tailor-made for 2020.

“1. Give yourself permission to be human.

2. Happiness lies at the intersection between pleasure and meaning.”

— quoted from the Psychology 1504 (“Positive Psychology”) course by Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar

One of the significant things about Sukkot is that it is a time for people to come together regardless of their circumstances, gender, religion, or political affiliation. It is a time for all to remember challenges of the past; while also celebrating better days ahead. Another especially noteworthy thing about Sukkot is the symbolism behind the rituals. For instance, one of the points of being outside in the most basic of shelters, exposed to the elements, is to remind people of the time when their ancestors were living in simple, temporary shelters when they were exiled in the desert for 40 years. It is also a good time to remember how much we have — as well as the fact that we could be happy with less. Sukkot is a reminder that life can be full, even when it is simple and bare-boned. It is a time of appreciation and it is also about accepting the present moment.

That last part — accepting the present moment — is easy to overlook. However, the commandment specifically states that the celebration occurs in a place chosen by God. In other words, we might not be where we want to be or where we thought we would be. (Hello, 2020!) This is something I point out every year, but it was especially pointed out to me in 2016, when the creamery, where I held my 2015 Sukkot retreat was no longer available… and again, in 2017, when it was no longer as easy to schedule time in the church where I held the second retreat… and again, in 2019, when the church camp I had planned to use experienced a fire and had to cancel the bulk of their season. And, then, 2020… once again, things were not as we planned — despite the fact that CP graciously offered to help me plan that year’s retreat. On the face, it might sometimes seem that we are “destined” not to observe this time — and yet, we do, every year… just not necessarily in the place that we thought.

“3. Keep in mind that happiness is mostly dependent on our state of mind, not on our status or the state of our bank account.

4. Simplify!”

— quoted from the Psychology 1504 (“Positive Psychology”) course by Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar

Many people refer to Sukkot as the “Season of Happiness”, because they view the instructions in the Bible as a mandate to be happy. Since the instruction is to be joyful, or rejoice, about things that have yet to happen — blessings yet to come — one has to wonder: How can we be “independently happy” and celebrate something that hasn’t happened yet? It’s a good question. And, it turns out, there are some really good answers.

Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, an expert in Positive Psychology and the author of Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment and A Clash of Values: The Struggle for Universal Freedom, used to teach a class at Harvard University called “Happiness 101”. In his class and through his research, he offered 6 very practical tips for cultivating happiness. Those tips are featured in the practices during Sukkot (and are highlighted throughout this blog post).

“5. Remember the mind-body connection.

6. Express gratitude, whenever possible.”

— quoted from the Psychology 1504 (“Positive Psychology”) course by Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar

Saturday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “Sukkot 2”]

There is no playlist for the Common Ground Meditation Center practices (on Monday).

Monday Practice Note: Since the prompt question, on Monday, October 21^st, elicited several references to educational pursuits, I mentioned that we are in the month of ‘Ilm (“Knowledge”) on the Bahá’í Faith calendar.

This practice also included a teaser for Tuesday.

Click on the excerpt title below for additional content referenced during these practices (including an explanation about the “hedonic treadmill” (or “hedonic adaptation”).

FTWMI*: What Does It Mean to You?

If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can dial 988 (in the US) or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call this TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.

White Flag is a new app, which I have not yet researched, but which may be helpful if you need peer-to-peer (non-professional) support.

If you are a young person in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgement-free place to talk, you can also click here to contact the TrevorLifeline (which is staffed 24/7 with trained counselors).

### YESTERDAY, TODAY, (the possibility of) TOMORROW ###

### Essential workers (outside of healthcare), Essential workers (within healthcare), Teachers ###