A Joyful Practice

LIFT YOUR LIGHT, LET YOUR POWER SHINE! June 17, 2020

FRIEND [Old English, with Germanic origin; related to Dutch and German words “to love,” also related to “free”] 1. One who is attached to another by affection; one who entertains for another sentiments of esteem, respect and affection, which lead him to desire his company, and to seek to promote his happiness and prosperity; opposed to foe or enemy.

“FRIEND’SHIP, noun frend’ship. 1. An attachment to a person, proceeding from intimate acquaintance, and a reciprocation of kind offices, or from a favorable opinion of the amiable and respectable qualities of his mind. friendship differs from benevolence, which is good will to mankind in general, and from that love which springs from animal appetite. True friendship is a noble and virtuous attachment, springing from a pure source, a respect for worth or amiable qualities. False friendship may subsist between bad men, as between thieves and pirates. This is a temporary attachment springing from interest, and may change in a moment to enmity and rancor.”

– partially excerpted from Webster’s Dictionary 1828

“Physically speaking, we can not separate. We can not remove our respective sections from each other nor build an impassable wall between them. A husband and wife may be divorced and go out of the presence and beyond the reach of each other, but the different parts of our country can not do this. They can not but remain face to face, and intercourse, either amicable or hostile, must continue between them. Is it possible, then, to make that intercourse more advantageous or more satisfactory after separation than before? Can aliens make treaties easier than friends can make laws? “

– quoted from President Abraham Lincoln’s first inaugural address (March 4, 1861)

Let’s talk about cultivating friendships and tokens of friendship. For the last few days, I have focused on the siddhis (“powers” or “accomplishments”) we all have and, in particular, those powers or abilities which are considered by Indian philosophy to be “unique to humans.” You can read what I’ve already posted here, here, and here. Now, however, I’m going to hone in a little more on how we use those “supernormal” powers and how we express or manifest those powers.

Whenever I talk about the symbolic and energetic aspects of the chakra system, I tie each chakra to the preceding chakras in order to highlight the connection between biography and biology. Hence, when I talk about making relationships “outside of our first family, tribe, or community of birth,” I mention that how and/or if we make friends with people we (and the world) perceive as being different from us is partially determined by where we come from – our first family. (Remember, as always, that just as we are genetically connected to people we have never met and will never meet, we are energetically connected to people we have never met and will never meet.)

“Sacred Truth: Honor one another. Every relationship you develop, from casual to intimate, helps you become more conscious. No union is without spiritual value.”

– quoted from “Morning Visual Meditation” by Caroline Myss

Geography, general proximity, definitely plays a part. Even with the internet “bringing” people closer together – and despite the pandemic enforced social distancing – our strongest bonds tend to be with people in close physical proximity with us. We meet people in the middle of their stories, and we get to know them backwards and forwards (literally and metaphorically) by spending time together. The more time we spend with someone the more vulnerable we are together and the more we know each other’s hearts. The stronger the bond, the tighter it holds when friends are not physically together.

Another thing that plays a part in cultivating friendships is a common thread. We may share a common ideology, based on a correct or incorrect understanding of the world – an understanding that we started learning as a child (see first family). More often than not, however, the common thread is something we like or dislike. Whether it is a shared love of tortillas, yoga, movies, music, books, sports in general, and/or a specific sport, musician, or author, people form bonds around an attachment that is rooted in pleasure. Conversely, we can also form really strong bonds around something we don’t like, an aversion or attachment rooted in pain. And, yes, if you are following along, I’m using the same descriptions that are used to explain two of the three afflicted or dysfunctional thought patterns. But, before we get to that, there’s another way we bond: We bond over a shared experience.

“All people who died on that day, to me, it is like they did not die in vain. As people we managed to take out good things from bad things, to live by today, to shape ourselves and our country.”

– Antoinette Sithole talking about the Soweto student Uprising (06/17/1976) and the unknown “gentleman” (Mbuyisa Makhubo) and woman who helped her after her 12-year old brother Hector Pieterson was killed

“Mbuyisa is or was my son. But he is not a hero. In my culture, picking up Hector is not an act of heroism. It was his job as a brother. If he left him on the ground and somebody saw him jumping over Hector, he would never be able to live there.”

– quoted from Mbuyisa Makhubo’s mother Ma’makhubu explaining why her son picked up a stranger during the Soweto student Uprising (06/17/1976)

Sometimes we bond over a beautiful experience. However, more often than not, really strong relationships form over a shared experience involving a very tragic or traumatic experience. Think of people that came together, and stayed together, after 9/11 or any number of mass shootings. Yesterday, at the end of class, I mentioned that it was “Youth Day” in Soweto, South Africa, a commemoration of the anti-apartheid student uprising that occurred on June 16, 1976. It was a horrible day that brought people together – just as so many horrible events are bringing people in the United States, and around the world, together today. And that’s the other thing: people can become friends because they went through similar experiences – like a terrorist attack, a natural disaster, or a war – even when they didn’t go through the experiences together.

If you look back, you will note that all of the ways I mentioned about friendship involve at least one of the five afflicted or dysfunctional thought patterns; thought patterns that create suffering – and all of those afflicted thought patterns are born out of ignorance. That is not to say that friendship is ignorant. In fact, it is easy to argue that friendship, community, and belonging are wise. There is a definite reason why the Buddha described sangha (“community”) as one of the three jewels. But, when we look at how we become friends with someone it is almost always based on the outside. How we stay friends, however, is based on the inside.

Granted, sometimes we stay friends with someone, because of that final afflicted thought pattern: fear of loss or death. We can all look in our circle of friends and find people we have known for some extended period of time. We may even still spend time with them. However, if we’re being honest, we don’t spend a lot of time with these people. We don’t call them – or even have a strong desire – to call them when we are struggling. They are not our go-to people in troubling times. If they reach out to us, we may wrap up the conversation quickly. These are the people that make us think, “Wait, why am I still friends with this person?” These are the people you have recently “unfriended” if you are on social media. Be honest: You’re still “friends” with some people simply because you’ve known them since preschool, grade school, high school, college, or your first job. While seem interacting with some friends may leave you feeling lighter and brighter, interactions with this latter group of friends leaves you feeling a little dull, disempowered.

“Because of these powers we are able to comprehend the invisible forces of nature and harness them to improve the quality of life. With the decline of our inner luminosity, we lose these powers to a significant degree.”

– quoted from the commentary on Yoga Sūtra 2.24 (as it relates to “dana”) from The Practice of the Yoga Sutra: Sadhana Pada by Pandit Rajmani Tigunait, PhD

I have mentioned this week, that the first three “powers unique to humans” are mental abilities that are directly related to the final three. These final three are the ability to eliminate three-fold sorrow (which requires being able to identify the cause of these sorrows), the ability to cultivate “a good heart; finding friends,” and dana (“generosity” or the ability to give). I have described the last three as “heart powers,” but really and truly all six are heart powers – as they are related to discernment, the interior movements of the heart. When we look at our friendships though this lens, we can definitely see the power of our hearts. We can also see times when, and the ways in which, we are disempowered by ignorance. Society will definitely allow, even condone, a rural Republican, white man in law enforcement (who grills over 50 types of burgers on the side) to not be friends with a liberal black, vegetarian woman from a big city in the South. But, thanks in part to geography, a friendship formed – and I, for one, am richer and more powerful for it. What initially connects people is on the outside, and that may also be what inevitable separates people. What keeps people connected, however, is on the inside.

“There are many of selfish people in this world. People who think first of themselves. Don’t be like them. Don’t give in to the tyranny of your ego and self. Don’t be hateful, don’t be racist, don’t be ignorant or foolish. Learn to appreciate diversity by actually experiencing it and not just talking about it or watching it on TV or in a movie. Talk to and build a relationship with someone that the world would fully let you get away with not interacting with, simply because it’s the right thing to do and you understand that it will benefit you. It’s harder to stereotype when you actually learn someone’s name.”

– Imam Khalid Latif in a 2013 “Ramadān Reflection” for Huffington Post

What is on the inside is something that can only be felt. It doesn’t always have an external reference point. Yes, we can see an expression of love, a token of friendship, and understand it from our own experiences. However, when we see a parent and a child hugging, or even two children hugging, we don’t exactly know what they are feeling. We can only know how we have felt in similar circumstances. We can use those first three “powers unique to humans” (“intuitive knowledge,” words/meanings, and the ability to “study, analyze, and comprehend”) in order to have an emotional, embodied experience. So, we feel the love. And, when we feel the love, we may eliminate some sorrow of our own; cultivate friendship; and/or “have both the wisdom and the courage to share what lawfully belongs to us with others.”

“Our power of discernment and intuitive wisdom enables us to distinguish good thoughts and feelings from bad ones, and cultivate the good ones further to enrich the virtues of our heart. The same capacity enables us to see beyond the boundaries of our little world and share our goodness with others. This capacity also motivates us to pass our achievements on to future generations.”

– quoted from the commentary on Yoga Sūtra 2.24 (as it relates to “finding friends”) from The Practice of the Yoga Sutra: Sadhana Pada by Pandit Rajmani Tigunait, PhD

Today in 1885, the Statue of Liberty arrived in New York Harbor. It was a token of friendship from France and the sculptor Frédéric-Auguste Bartholdi. Bartholdi wanted to commemorate the anniversary of the American Revolution and also acknowledge its connection to the French Revolution. He felt kinship between the nations because of how each populace had overthrown royal sovereignty and oppression. He wanted also to honor the concepts of liberty, freedom, and equality smashing the chains of slavery. Initially inspired by the image of an Arab peasant woman and his own mother, he called the statue “Liberty Enlightening the World” and felt the words and symbols of the statue would do just that – enlighten the world.

The 450,000-pound copper-colored statue arrived in 350 individual pieces shipped in over 200 cases. This included the iron scaffolding created by Gustave Eiffel, who would later create the Eiffel Tower. Lady Liberty would be reassembled and dedicated the following year; but, there was a moment where this symbol of freedom and democracy seemed destined to collect dust like a puzzle someone decided not to put together. The project ran out of money. Who knows what would have happened if not for the general populace in both countries. The statue cost France an estimated $250,000 (about $5.5 million today). The United States was responsible for funding and building the pedestal, another $250,000 – $300,000. Fundraising efforts on both sides of the Atlantic included auctions, a lottery, and boxing matches. Publisher Joseph Pulitzer started a drive that attracted over 120,000 contributors. Remember, this was long before the internet and social media. Some people could only donate a dollar, but most donated less than that.

Emma Lazarus, an author and Jewish activist, wrote the sonnet “The New Colossus” in 1883 and auctioned it off during one of the fundraising efforts featuring original art and manuscripts. Lines from the poem would eventually be inscribed on the pedestal, but Lazarus initial declined the opportunity to participate in the auction. She said she couldn’t write a poem about a statue. In fact, what she eventually wrote was a gift of empathetic friendship for Jewish refugees. Part of her philanthropic efforts in the world included helping refugees who had fled anti-Semetic pogroms in Europe and Lazarus saw the refugees living in conditions that were outside of her privileged experience. Lazurus used her first three powers to supercharge her final three powers and, in doing so, she empowered the heart encased in Bartholdi’s statue and generations of hearts who have since read her words.

“‘Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!’ cries she

With silent lips. ‘Give me your tired, your poor,

Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,

The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,

I lift my lamp beside the golden door!’”

– from the poem “The New Colossus” by Emma Lazarus

Please join me today (Wednesday, June 17th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a practice where we will empower the extensions of our hearts. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.

Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (The playlist starts with instrumental music. If your Spotify is on shuffle, you will want your music volume low at the beginning of the practice.)

### MO’ METTĀ, LESS BLUES ###