More Like Birds & Trees (the “missing” Tuesday post) July 26, 2023

Stay hydrated, y’all, and “may our hearts be open!”

This is a “missing” post for Tuesday, July 25^th. NOTE: Some links direct to sites outside of this blog. You can request an audio recording of either practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

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“When we suffer, we tend to think that suffering is all there is at that moment, and happiness belongs to some other time or place.”

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

How are you doing today?

Seriously. I really want know how you’re feeling and how you’re doing today.

I’m asking because I care.

I’m also asking because, in order to answer (honestly), you have to check in with yourself – and that’s an important part of the practice.

My personal practice includes this blog, my class notes (a. k. a. the notebooks full of hieroglyphics), videos and playlists, and my personal journals. All of those bits and pieces of the process give me the ability to look back and notice how the ways I’m feeling change: from one moment/day/week/month/year to the next. Nestled together are big changes and little changes that I might have missed if I didn’t have this type of practice. There are instances where I find myself experiencing the same things around the same time of year (or month). Similarly, there are times when an emotion/sensation that was simmering in the background comes to a boil.

Then, there are times when something like anger is still present, but no longer carries the same charge.

“Anger is a mental, psychological phenomenon, yet it is closely linked to biological and biochemical elements. Anger makes you tense your muscles, but when you know how to smile, you begin to relax and your anger will decrease. Smiling allows the energy of mindfulness to be born in you, helping you to embrace your anger.”

― quoted from “Two – Putting Out the Fire of Anger: Tools for Cooling the Flames” in Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh

A couple of years ago, I was contemplating anger, because it was everywhere. As I do, I turned to my practice, which included a bit of history and the wisdom of teachers like Thích Nhất Hạnh and Pema Chödrön. I noted that external factors, like the “great heat, major heat”, can affect our emotions. I even dived into the tropes and stereotypes around “angry Black women” and I touched on the flip side of that – people thinking I shouldn’t feel strong emotions because I practice yoga and meditation. That last part is something that some men in certain cultures have also had to deal with because of tropes and stereotypes related to their gender and emotions.

I also mentioned how eastern philosophies and their medical sciences – like Daoism and Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) and Yoga and Ayurveda – view every emotion as an energetic experience (as well as a mental, psychological, physiological, biological, and biochemical experience) whereby energy is either in-balance or out-of-balance. Finally, I outlined some steps any one of us can take in order to move into balance. Keep in mind, as Dr. Beau Lotto pointed out, that what may seem like a baby step to me, may feel like a giant leap to you (and vice versa).

The thing is, all of the anger that I referenced, in 2021, is still present. For some people, it has even been magnified. However, anger is no longer on the top of the list of the things I’m feeling. Instead, I’m a little weary… and tired of the shenanigans that previously made me so angry. This feeling is something that I brought up this time last year, in a “9 Days” video* inspired by a map (that a little kid gave me back in 2008) and a Dermot Kennedy song.

“My sense of wonder’s just a little tired”

― quoted from the song “Lost” by Dermot Kennedy, co-written by Carey Willetts

Considering our emotional experiences from an energetic standpoint may help us accept our emotions as natural (which they are) – even if we don’t believe in the traditional sciences. First, they give us a place to start; a first and second step if you will. The eastern philosophies and their sister sciences can be useful processing paradigms, because every energetic experience has an opposite reaction (as well as what we can consider a near-peer) and we are encouraged to cultivate the opposites (when we are out of balance). As I mentioned on Sunday and Monday, heart (YIN) and small intestine (YANG) meridians have several associations, including joy (when in-balance) versus anxiety (when out-of-balance). The other big emotion pairs (based on Yin Yoga) include:

• Anger and Frustration versus Kindness/Lovingkindness
• Worry versus Peace, Faith, and Acceptance (or Trustful Surrender)
• Grief and Sorrow versus Courage, Resilience, Tenacity (balanced with non-attachment), and Reverence
• Fear versus Wisdom

Consider, for a moment, how your emotions shift when you are feeling angry and/or frustrated and then do something kind (for yourself and/or for someone else). Consider, also, what happens when cultivating a moment of peace/acceptance enables you to let go of a worry. Maybe, in that moment, of trustful surrender you find the wisdom inside of yourself that alleviates some fear.

Years ago, in a meditation group, my dharma and yoga buddy Lenice dropped a little wisdom during a particularly harsh winter: What if we were more like the trees? Think about it, as long as they are alive, they grow and blossom and let go of the things that no longer serve them. In the essay, “Africa,” published in the collection Even the Stars Look Lonesome, Maya Angelou wrote about trauma and stated, “An African proverb spells out the truth: ‘The ax forgets. The tree remembers.’” Another way to think about that is: the tree remembers it’s trauma, but keeps living; keeps blossoming and growing; keeps letting go of what no longer serves it.

Of course, Dr. Angelou and Victor Hugo also remind us that we are (or can be) like birds – and, sometimes the practice just comes down to knowing what we need in order to blossom, grow, sing, and let go of what no longer serves us.

“Be like the bird, who
Halting in his flight
On limb too slight
Feels it give way beneath him,
Yet sings
Knowing he hath wings.”

– quoted from the poem “Be Like the Bird” by Victor Hugo

NOTE: In Abbie Betinis’s musical composition (which is on the playlists), “she” has wings.

Again, you might be having a moment where some (or all) of this feels like giant leaps. And, that’s OK. Maybe it’s too much to think about smiling, blossoming, singing, and flying. Maybe you just need to focus on the breathing! The key is to find the thing that makes sense for you in this moment.

Then, when it makes sense, consider what seems like the next logical step, given where you are and how you’re feeling. Maybe, what you need is a different perspective; so, you reach out to a friend or a professional. I recently heard of a new app, called “White Flag,” that cultivates peer-to-peer support. (Full disclosure, I haven’t checked it out or investigated it much, but I’ve heard good things.) Maybe what you need is to go back to that first step and breathe some more.

Maybe what you need is more movement or maybe less movement (depending on the weather). Maybe you don’t wanna move today (and there’s now a video on the Carry app for that). Either way, keep in mind that, as Sarah Powers pointed out in Insight Yoga: An innovative synthesis of traditional yoga, meditation, and Eastern approaches to healing and well-being, “All emotions associated with the organs are considered natural responses to life. Yet when they become compulsive or prolonged, they become injurious to our overall health.”

“If we can learn to see and skillfully engage with both the presence of happiness and the presence of suffering, we will go in the direction of enjoying life more. Every day we go a little farther in that direction, and eventually we realize that suffering and happiness are not two separate things.”

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

So, how are you doing, in this moment?

While I hope you are doing well, I also recognize that you may be, simultaneously, feeling a certain kind of way about things and that you might label some of those ways as “not so well” and/or “not so good.” You might even be having one of the moments/days/weeks/months/years/lifetimes that you would describe as “mostly good.”

Or, maybe in this moment, you’re “good” and you’re taking everything a moment at a time.

I see all that. I care about that. May you be where you need to be; “[going] in the direction of enjoying life more;” moving towards your experience of happiness – whether that experience is an ecstatic kind of joy, not being miserable, or somewhere in between.

“Happiness is possible right now, today―but happiness cannot be without suffering. Some people think that in order to be happy they must avoid all suffering, so they are constantly vigilant, constantly worrying. They end up sacrificing all their spontaneity, freedom, and joy. This isn’t correct. If you can recognize and accept your pain without running away from it, you will discover that although pain is there, joy can also be there at the same time.”

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

Due to technical difficulties, we used two different set of playlists for this practice. The evening playlist is the one specifically mixed for this date.

Tuesday afternoon’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “04102021 Si se puede & Birds”]

Tuesday evening’s playlist is also available on YouTube and Spotify.

NOTE: The evening playlist on YouTube contains additional videos. I was not aware of this “Birdsong” when I made the playlist, so it is not (currently) included on either format.

“Each morning I offer a stick of incense to the Buddha. I promise myself that I will enjoy every minute of the day that is given me to live.”

― quoted from “Five – Compassionate Communication: Nourishing Ourselves” in Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh

*That aforementioned 9 Days” video

If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can dial 988 (in the US) or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call this TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.

During the practice, I mention a new app (White Flag), which I have not researched, but which may be helpful if you need (non-professional) support.

If you are a young person in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgement-free place to talk, you can also click here to contact the TrevorLifeline (which is staffed 24/7 with trained counselors).

### NOTICE HOW WHAT YOU’RE FEELING CHANGES ###