“I am now wholly occupied with the new work … and it is hard for me to tear myself away from it. I believe it comes into being as the best of my works. I must finish it as soon as possible, for I have to wind up a lot of affairs and I must soon go to London. I told you that I had completed a Symphony which suddenly displeased me, and I tore it up. Now I have composed a new symphony which I certainly shall not tear up.”
— quoted from an 1893 letter from Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky to his brother Modest, as published in Tchaikovsky: The Man Revealed by John Suchet
Abbie Richards is a graduate student at Wageningen University & Research in the Netherlands who, in addition to being an environment and climate scholar, has studied the history of racism, sexism, and classism in golf and also created a hierarchical pyramid of conspiracy theories. I serendipitously came across a story about her conspiracy pyramid and I started wondering where, exactly, Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky’s Symphony No. 6 in B minor, Op. 74 would fall in the ranks.
Going by the Gregorian calendar, “The Passionate Symphony” premiered today in 1893 in Saint Petersburg, “the Cultural Capital of Russia.” It was the second work dedicated to the composer’s nephew, Vladimir Davydov (or “Bob,” as the composer called him) and, understandably (given Bob’s personality and temperament) was full of feelings. But, before we get all up in the feels, consider that the “tenor” of the piece changed when Tchaikovsky died nine days after he conducted the premiere.
“The Passionate Symphony” was the last piece premiered in Tchaikovsky’s life time and the penultimate piece he composed (with the Piano Concerto No. 3 in E-flat major, Op. 75, the last “completed” work, premiering after his death). The symphony’s second performance (on November 18, 1893) was a memorial tribute and contained some changes made by Tchaikovsky in the nine days between the premiere and his death. Conspiracy theories about the piece started almost immediately, fueled first by a passing comment between Tchaikovsky and his dear friend Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov and then by Tchaikovsky’s sudden death, not to mention the “in memorium” subtitle that accompanied the second performance.
“If this symphony is misunderstood, and torn to shreds, I shall think it quite normal, and not at all surprising. It will not be the first time. But I myself absolutely believe it to be the best and especially the most sincere of all my works. I love it as I have never loved any single one of my other musical creations.”
— quoted from an 1893 letter from Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky to his nephew Vladimir “Bob” Davydov as posted in “Music History Monday: His Own Requiem?” by Robert Greenberg
Tchaikovsky and Rimsky-Korsakov were part of “The Five” (or “the Mighty Handful” or “The Mighty Five”) who collaborated together and promoted a distinctly Russian style of classical music during the 19th century. Around the time of the first performance of the “The Passionate Symphony,” Rimsky-Korsakov reportedly asked Tchaikovsky if the piece was or had a program, referring to a narrative or specific atmosphere. Tchaikovsky said yes, but did not elaborate. The fact that a cruciform melody (changing tones giving the physical appearance of a crucifix) appears in the symphony and that the symphony ends in an unconventional way got people thinking,
When some of those same people attended the memorial performance on November 18th, they listened closely for some sign that the piece was a musical farewell or “symphony as suicide note.” Of course, confirmation bias kicked in and, to this day, people point to all kinds of musical “evidence” to support their theories, despite the fact that just a month before the premiere, Tchaikovsky stated that he was in no mood to write a requiem. Plus, there’s the fact that the composer could not have known he was going to die unexpectedly at age 53 and was planning a trip to London. His death is officially attributed to cholera (reportedly caused by drinking contaminated water), but conspiracy theorists have other ideas. (And, I suppose, the fact the Tchaikovsky’s mother died of cholera when he was 14 years old is just more proof for the conspiracy pudding).
“It was not true that cholera victims were always placed in sealed coffins, and Tchaikovsky’s own mother was the proof. It is documented that she lay in an open coffin, and her children were brought into the room to kiss her forehead. None of them contracted cholera as a result.
The custom in Tchaikovsky’s day, she told me, was for the coffin to be open for family and friends to pay respects, and then sealed for the funeral.
As if to clinch the argument, she told me Tchaikovsky’s death had been certified as caused by cholera by several doctors, all experts in their field. The death certificate, and other necessary paperwork, was signed and countersigned in accordance with procedure. Furthermore, since cholera was so epidemic in St Petersburg, the newspapers carried a daily list of victims in its pages. Tchaikovsky’s name had appeared, along with others. A cover-up would have been impossible.”
— quoted from Tchaikovsky: The Man Revealed by John Suchet
But, let’s get back to what we (for a fact) know to be Tchaikovsky’s intent: a tribute to Bob. The composer’s nephew was reportedly an artistic young man who ultimately decided to go into the military. Both Tchaikovsky and Davydov struggled with depression and, it appears, their relationship helped them bolster each other. Uncle and nephew had a close enough relationship that the composer at one point considered moving to be closer to the person he described as “the paramount condition of my happiness.” Additionally, Tchaikovsky left all his royalties and copyrights to his nephew, who would eventually resign his commission in order to help his uncle Modest Ilyich Tchaikovsky (the composer’s brother) run the museum created to honor the composer’s life and work. To my knowledge, there’s no question about the fact that Vladimir “Bob” Davydov used morphine and other drugs to numb his feelings or that he committed suicide at the age of 34 — something his uncle didn’t see coming.
Both uncle and nephew, as I mentioned before, could be described as “passionate” or “emotional” (with a side of suffering) and this was the original meaning of the title Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky assigned to his penultimate work, Symphony No. 6 in B minor, Op. 74. Tchaikovsky’s brother Modest (Bob’s other artistic uncle) claimed to have suggested the title Pateticheskaya (Патетическая ) which contains an emotional nuance and complexity not found in a single English word. The nuance (and subsequent meaning) gets further lost to modern audiences, because the most common title for the piece is the French word Pathétique — which is sometimes reduced to “The Pathetic” to distinguish it from Ludwig van Beethoven’s 1798 piano sonata (with the same French name).
Based on his response to Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov’s question and the fact that Tchaikovsky abandoned a title that would have called attention to “a hidden program,” there is evidence that the composer did not want people to be too curious about the meaning. That evidence suggests that Tchaikovsky just wanted people to feel — maybe even to feel some of what he and Bob felt. Or, maybe, the whole piece was just note from uncle to nephew, saying, “You are not alone in this.”
“While on my travels I had another idea for a symphony – a program work this time, but its program will remain a conundrum to everyone. Let them guess at it. This program is imbued with subjectivity. While composing it in my thoughts, I often wept a great deal. Then I began writing drafts, and the work was as heated as it was rapid. In less than four days I completed the first movement, and the remaining movements were outlined in my head. There will be much that is new in this symphony where form is concerned, one point being that the finale will not be a loud allegro, but the reverse, a most unhurried adagio. You cannot imagine the bliss I feel after becoming convinced that time has not yet run out and that it is still possible to work.”
— quoted from an 1893 letter from Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky to his nephew Vladimir “Bob” Davydov as posted in “Music History Monday: His Own Requiem?” by Robert Greenberg
Please join me today (Wednesday, October 28th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.
“…You see, my dear friend, I am made up of contradictions, and I have reached a very mature age without resting upon anything positive, without having calmed my restless spirit either by religion or philosophy. Undoubtedly I should have gone mad but for music. Music is indeed the most beautiful of all Heaven’s gifts to humanity wandering in the darkness. Alone it calms, enlightens, and stills our souls. It is not the straw to which the drowning man clings; but a true friend, refuge, and comforter, for whose sake life is worth living.”
— quoted from 1877 letter from Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky to Nadezhda Filaretovna “N. F.” von Meck (who supported the financially supported the composer for 13-years), as published in The Life & Letters of Peter Ilich Tchaikovsky by Modeste Tchaikovsky
If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can dial 988 (in the US) or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255)for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call this TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.
White Flag is a new app, which I have not yet researched, but which may be helpful if you need peer-to-peer (non-professional) support.
In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)
Revised formatting and some links (10/28/2024). Typographical errors corrected (10/28/2025).
### THERE WAS A WHOLE LOT OF SHAKING GOING ON TODAY IN 1957 LA ###
“He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.”
– #146 quoted from “CHAPTER IV. APOPHTHEISMS AND INTERLUDES” of Beyond Good and Evil: Prelude to a Philosophy of the Future by Friedrich Nietzsche (b. 10/15/1844)
Even in years like this, when I don’t actually teach on the anniversary of the birth of the philosopher of Friedrich Nietzsche, his words creep into my brain. I find myself, on the mat or on the cushion, seeking the form or āsana (“seat”) where power increases and overcomes resistance, so there is happiness. I find myself seeking truth by exploring the realm of “any form of scepticism to which I can reply, ‘Let’s try it!’ But I want to hear nothing more about all the things and questions that don’t admit of experiment.” And, while I definitely consider what makes us stronger, I also consider on what we focus, concentrate, meditate; and how that focus affects us.
Towards the end of the first section of the Yoga Sūtras, Patanjali offers various ways to meditate – which he later explains (YS 2.11) can destroy the afflicted thought patterns which cause suffering. But towards the end of that list, he seems to throw his hands up and say, “You know what, focus on whatever.” (YS 1.39) Yes, yes, the actual word he uses, abhimata (“well-considered”) is a little more precise than “whatever.” More importantly, however, is that he goes on to tell us “that meditating on different objects leads to different experiences.” (YS 1.41)
And there, again, is our old friend Nietzsche, making us consider into what we gaze!
“[M]y work, which I’ve done for a long time, was not pursued in order to gain the praise I now enjoy, but chiefly from a craving after knowledge, which I notice resides in me more than in most other men. And therewithal, whenever I found out anything remarkable, I have thought it my duty to put down my discovery on paper, so that all ingenious people might be informed thereof.”
– Antonie van Leeuwenhoek
Born today in 1632, in Delft, Dutch Republic, Antonie van Leeuwenhoek is known as the “Father of Microbiology,” because he gazed long into tiny microscopes and then wrote letters to the Royal Society in London describing what he found. Van Leeuwenhoek was not a scientist, however. Instead, he was a draper who used lenses (as drapers and jewelers do) to see the quality of the material. But he was also a very curious person and so he started playing around with making his magnifying glasses more magnificent. Eventually he developed a (teeny tiny) lens so strong he could see what he called “animalcules.” And those “tiny animals,” which we now know as “microbes,” were everywhere! On his fine linen, on his tables and chairs, on his skin, in his body, on (and in) his family and friends – even in the air he breathed.
Antonie Van Leeuwenhoek observed unicellular organisms as well as multicellular organisms (in pond water). He was the first to observe and document muscle fibers, bacteria, spermatozoa, red blood cells, and blood flowing in capillaries. In part because he wasn’t a scientist, and in part because no one else had observed such things, people were a little skeptical. The thing was (and is), his observations could be duplicated. Other people could see what he saw – using his super strong lenses that magnified up to 275 times.
To add a certain level of credibility, van Leeuwenhoek allowed people to believe he spent all day and all night grinding glass and then peering into it. And, in fact, he did make about hundreds of lenses of various intensities and at least 25 different types of single-lens microscopes. It did not, however, take as much time as he led people to believe. He was after all, a businessman who had a shop to run. Sometimes, however, credibility comes down to illusion.
“People who look for the first time through a microscope say now I see this and then I see that and even a skilled observer can be fooled. On these observations I’ve spent more time than many will believe, but I’ve done them with joy, and I’ve taken no notice those who have said why take so much trouble and what good is it?”
– Antonie van Leeuwenhoek
Today in 1926, the internationally acclaimed Harry Houdini performed his last show. He was at the Garrick Theater in Detroit, Michigan, performing with a 104˚ fever, cold sweats, and acute appendicitis. Additionally, he had fractured his left ankle when a piece of equipment accidentally struck him on October 11th and then, on Oct 22nd, a student at Montreal’s McGill University punched him in the stomach before he could brace himself. (Note: The student wasn’t trying to hurt Houdini, but instead wanted to see for himself if the illusionist could resist hard punches.) After the show in Montreal, Houdini complained of stomach pain; but the show must go on. He collapsed after the show in Michigan and was rushed to Grace Hospital, where he died in Room 401 on Halloween.
People were, and continue to be, fascinated by Harry Houdini’s life and death. To this day, people hold séances on Halloween night in an attempt to contact his spirit. James “The Amazing” Randi, a famous magician and (perhaps the most famous) skeptic, died on October 20th at the age of 92. He broke some of Houdini’s records and was one of the co-founders of the Committee for the Scientific Investigation of Claims of the Paranormal, which endeavors to debunk some larger than life myths and promotes (observable) science in classrooms. I’m guessing his husband, Jose, is not of the same mindset as Houdini’s wife, Bess, who set up the first Halloween séance 10 years after Harry Houdini’s death. However, I’m betting someone still tries to contact him, because wouldn’t that be the ultimate coup: winning The Amazing Randi’s $1M prize by successfully contacting his spirit.
“Magical thinking, you know, is a slippery slope. Sometimes it’s harmless enough, but other times it’s quite dangerous. Personally, I’m opposed to that kind of fakery, so I have no kinds of reservations at all about exposing those people and their illusions for what they really are.”
– James “The Amazing” Randi
James Randi, Antonie van Leeuwenhoek, Friedrich Nietzsche, and even Harry Houdini encouraged us to consider our thinking. Why can we be fooled and why do we sometimes not believe what is right in front of ours. There is also the question of what do we believe and what do we want to believe. All things that can best be answered by gazing long into ourselves – and this, again and again, is what Patanjali recommended.
One of the niyamās (“internal observations”) is svādhyāyā (“self-study”) which is a form of discernment whereby we look at ourselves – our thoughts and reactions – in relation to sacred text, chants, or even historical scenarios. In explaining the benefits of this type of internal observation, Patanjali references “bright being(s),” “angel(s),” or “God” (depending on the translation). It’s not the first, not the last time, Patanjali references something higher than our physical form. Each time, however, he is very deliberate about the word he uses. During the practice, I often say, “God – whatever that means to you at this moment” and, in the case of Yoga Sūtra 2.44 we have an opportunity to really focus, concentrate, meditate on what that means to us, and why it matters.
Yoga Sūtra 2.44: svādhyāyādişţadevatāsamprayogah
– “From self-study comes the opportunity to be in the company of bright beings [of our choice].”
Please join me for a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, October 24th) at 12:00 PM. You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0.
You can request an audio recording of Saturday’s practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email me at myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible, class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)
“Our minds and all that functions through our minds generate a continual stream of micro and macro activities through the complex of our non-stop brain. Our emotions are always active. We are constantly making choices, consciously and unconsciously. And – think about this – our “choices continue to make choices.” How’s that for a thought? But it’s pure truth. And because it’s truth, we need to find a way to evaluate the micro and macro impact of our thoughts, attitudes, belief patterns – the whole of our energetic personality and nature – as the energetic reflection of the landscape of our physical life.”
– quoted from “What Can You Heal in Five Minutes” (from the 2014 Online Salon) by Caroline Myss
The way the world communicated (and was entertained) changed dramatically today in 1954 when Texas Instruments and the Regency Division of Industrial Development Engineering Associates (IDEA Inc.) introduced the Regency Model TR-1, the first commercial transistor radio, to markets in New York and Los Angeles. When the device first went on sale (on November 1st) it cost $49.95 – which was a lot of money back in the 1950’s – but almost 100,000 of the pocket radios were sold in the first year and a technology (as well as an entertainment) revolution had begun.
Prior to the “pocket-sized” TR-1, radios were mostly considered a piece of household furniture. They were essentially big dressers or medium sized jewelry boxes that housed circuitry centered around breakable vacuum tubes. The tubes used a lot of energy, took a long time to warm, and were incredibly fragile. There were “portable” tube radios, but they were about the size and weight of a lunchbox; were powered by several heavy, non-rechargeable batteries; and they didn’t even pretend to be shock resistant. So, few people invested in them. Instead, families huddled around the radio, waited for it to warm-up, and paid attention to the energy output (especially during the war).
No one really thought about listening (or even watching) something they whole family wasn’t going to hear (or see). Furthermore, no one (outside of the electronics industry) really thought about walking around with your personal choice of music, news, podcasts, and other forms of entertainment streaming out of our pockets 24/7. That possibility, that is our reality, became reality because of the introduction of transistors.
Like the old-fashioned vacuum tubes, transistors are devices used to amplify and switch (and also convert) electronic signals and electrical power. Unlike the tubes, transistors are made of semiconductor material which means that that they have an electrical conductivity value which falls between a metal conductor and an insulator (like glass). One of the main benefits to using semiconductor material in electronics is that its ability to conduct electrical current increases as it heats up (meaning its resistivity decreases), which is the opposite of metals. Semiconductor devices, like transistors, offer a lot of versatility and flexibility – especially when you want to pass current in more than one direction – and provided the radios with an “instant-on” capability. All of which allows people to conveniently and quickly share their stories.
“Our psyches are governed by archetypal patterns, containers of myths and symbols that continually feed our unconscious. Our health and well-being feeds off of the stories we tell ourselves, stories that are created, generated, and rooted in our myths. Every person I talk to tells me a story in some way about his or her life and that story inevitably contains at least one symbol or hints at one myth. As each of the participants of the Help Desk told me a bit about themselves, I listened for both the details they were sharing as well as any symbols or metaphors in their descriptions through which I could then identify an archetypal pattern. We can’t stop ourselves from revealing our archetypes. All of these systems that combine to make up each human life need to be understood in terms of how they speak to each other, how they participate in acts of creation, how they interact with the creative mechanisms of our psyche and soul, and how their sensitivities influence the development of physical illnesses. And further, how do we interact with this extraordinary system of life that is US when it comes to healing an illness?
I view the realm of health and healing through this lens now. In fact, it’s more of a parallel reality in that the real power of who we are truly exists in the realm of energy, or our energy field. Our health is regulated by far more than chemicals and nutrition, as we know. But adding on knowledge about the chakras, for instance, is hardly enough to span the spectrum of all that we have come to discover about the depth and width of our interior selves. Speaking about “chakras”, for instance, represents a great deal more than energy dots laid over the physical anatomy. The recognition of our energy anatomy – of energy consciousness itself – represents an entirely different paradigm of how we need to consider the nature of our concept of power.”
– quoted from “What Can You Heal in Five Minutes” (from the 2014 Online Salon) by Caroline Myss
The physical practice of yoga (hatha yoga, regardless of style or tradition) is simultaneously physical-mental, emotional-energetic, and psychic-symbolic. In the same way we are not always aware of how are mind-body communicates with itself and ourselves, we are not always aware of how we are communicating with others. The practice, however, gives us the opportunity to start paying attention to not only how we communicate, but also why we communicate. Every part of our being has a story to tell (and a method to tell it); every part of our story is connected to someone else’s story; and they way the stories are told (or not) determines how we think of the story, the storyteller, and the other players.
Consider, for instance, the story of the transistor radio. If you didn’t know the significance of today and someone mentioned transistor radios, your first thought might not be Texas Instruments or IDEA. Instead, your first thought might be SONY. Because not long after Texas Instruments and IDEA went on to new innovations, a Japanese company rebranded itself and (in 1957) introduced the TR-63, a smaller and cheaper transition radio that conveniently preceded with a global “music” mania. And that mania, is not only the stuff of musical legends, it’s the stuff that makes up the story.
Today is the anniversary of the birth of Ntozake Shange. Born today in 1948, she was an award winning playwright and novelist who changed her name to the Zulu words meaning “she comes with her own things” and “who walks like a lion.” The beginning of her story predates the transistor radio, but it is a definite element in her stories. The remainder of this post is part of a 2018 Kiss My Asana offering.
“somebody/anybody sing a black girl’s song bring her out to know herself to know you but sing her rhythms carin/struggle/hard times”
– The Lady in Brown with all the other Ladies from for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf by Ntozake Shange
“somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
not my poems or a dance i gave up in the street
but somebody almost walked off wid alla my stuff
like a kleptomaniac workin hard & forgettin while stealin
this is mine!
this aint yr stuff
now why don’t you put me back
& let me hang out in my own
Self”
– The Lady in Green from for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf by Ntozake Shange
I said it before, and I’ll say it again: The danger in not telling your story isn’t only that it might not be told, it’s also that someone else might tell your story. Someone else might, to quote the choreopoem, run off with all of your stuff. And, if someone else tells your story, they may (at best) leave out your rhythm, your tone, and what is most important to you. At worse, however, someone else telling your story can objectify you or turn you into a caricature, a living breathing stereotype come to life on the page – or on the stage.
Up until recently, certain individuals had a hard time telling their own stories in a way that they could be heard, seen, and validated. They didn’t have the money, the prestige, or the influence. I say this knowing full well that certain marginalized groups (people of color, women – of almost any color, GLBTQI, people who practice certain faiths, people who have been abused by people with power, the physically disabled, and the mentally disabled…just to name a few) still have a harder time getting their stories told, heard, seen, and validated than people who identify in a way that is not marginalized. Slowly but surely, that is changing. Still, as hard as it is, it would be harder were it not for people like Lorraine Hansberry and Ntozake Shange and works like Hansberry’s A Raisin in the Sun and Shange’s choreopoem for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf.
“Write if you will: but write about the world as it is and as you think it ought to be and must be—if there is to be a world. Write about all the things that men have written about since the beginning of writing and talking—but write to a point. Work hard at it, care about it. Write about our people: tell their story. You have something glorious to draw on begging for attention. Don’t pass it up. Don’t pass it up. Use it. Good luck to you. The Nation needs your gifts.”
– from a speech to Readers Digest/United Negro Fund creative writing contest winners (May 1, 1964) by Lorraine Hansberry
Lorraine Hansberry’s A Raisin in the Sun was inspired by real life events. It was also the first play written by a Black woman (and directed by a Black person) to appear on Broadway (1959). At some point during high school, I read excerpts from Lorraine Hansberry’s play What Use Are Flowers? and her autobiography To Be Young, Gifted and Black: Lorraine Hansberry in Her Own Words. Reading her words, I thought, “I could be that. I could write, I could act, and I could represent the world…as I see it.” I can only imagine where I would be if that idea – of being on stage while putting my work on stage – hadn’t been cemented in my mind. But, there it was, an inspiration not unlike the Langston Hughes poem that inspired the title of Hansberry’s most famous play. And, like a raisin in the sun, my dream kinda got deferred.
I auditioned for The Sunshine Boys during my first semester of college. The directors kept asking me to read with different people who were auditioning, which I took as a good sign. Unbeknownst to me, they weren’t considering me for a role on stage. Instead, the directors asked if I would be their assistant. I said yes and then found myself in the role of their stage manager… and their producer and their publicist. Fast forward 7 years and I was working as a professional stage manager for the writer/director who’s most famous play was the second Broadway play written by a Black woman: Ntozake Shange.
“hey man
where are you goin wid alla my stuff?!
this is a woman’s trip & i need my stuff”
– The Lady in Green from for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf by Ntozake Shange
In 1974, Shange and four other women started performing the choreopoems that would become for colored girls…. Seventeen years after Hansberry’s Broadway premiere, Shange’s work found its way to the Great White Way. (I say, [It] found its way,” but in truth, Ntozake is (to this day) a force of creative nature and moving across the country was the least of the things she did to shepherd her work.) Twenty years after she wrote and first started to perform the poems, Shange was in Houston directing a revival.
Ntozake Shange was not the first arts and entertainment legend with whom I worked – and she would not be the last – but holy cow did she leave an indelible impression. I worked with her twice and both times I was struck by her unwavering commitment to her own vision. While it is not unusual for a director to be strong, fierce, and artistically determined, she was one of the first woman (not to mention one of the first women of color) with whom I worked who was unapologetic about who she was and what she wanted. Also notable, she saw the world and, therefore, presented the world in a very different way from the mainstream. She was (and is) defiantly herself, singing her songs, dancing to her own rhythms, and – in doing so – giving us permission to do the same.
Everybody has a rhythm, a cadence, a pace of life and one big part of the physical practice of yoga is to find your rhythm and to move to it. Your breath sets your pace, but even within the pace there is room to (physically) harmonize. Find your pace, find you rhythm, and let the movement tell your story.
Please join me for a 65-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Sunday, October 18th) at 2:30 PM.I am in the process of updating the links from the “Class Schedules” calendar; however, the Meeting IDs in the calendar are the same and are correct. PLEASE NOTE: Zoom 5.0 is in effect. If you have not upgraded, you will need to give yourself extra time to log into Zoom. You can always request an audio recording of this practice (or any practice) via email or a comment below.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (This is the playlist “07112020 An Introduction.”)
In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)
### “I found god in myself and i loved her i loved her fiercely” (NS) ###
“‘FRATELLI TUTTI’.[1] With these words, Saint Francis of Assisi addressed his brothers and sisters and proposed to them a way of life marked by the flavour of the Gospel. Of the counsels Francis offered, I would like to select the one in which he calls for a love that transcends the barriers of geography and distance, and declares blessed all those who love their brother ‘as much when he is far away from him as when he is with him’.[2] In his simple and direct way, Saint Francis expressed the essence of a fraternal openness that allows us to acknowledge, appreciate and love each person, regardless of physical proximity, regardless of where he or she was born or lives.”
– quoted from Encyclical Letter “Fratelli Tutti” of the Holy Father Francis on Fraternity and Social Friendship (signed October 3, 2020)
Nothing happened today in 1582 – at least not in Italy, Spain, Portugal, France, and places like the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth. These Papal-governed nations were the first to switch from the Julian calendar to the Gregorian calendar (named for Pope Gregory XIII) and, therefore, skipped 10 days (October 5 – 14). The switch was primarily motivated by the Church’s desire to consistently observe Easter during the same season in which it had originally been celebrated. Of course, that date was (and is) a movable feast, but by the early third century people were no longer able to rely on an annual announcement from the Pope to tell them when to celebrate.
The First Council of Nicaea (in 325 AD) proposed a standard date, such as March 21st, which would correspond with the ecclesiastical full moon. Ultimately, however, the Church developed the computes (“computation”) which allowed clergy to independently calculate what was essentially the Passover moon – but without depending on the Hebrew calendar. The only problem was that as early as the 8th century people noted that the Julian calendar contained a calculation error that was already throwing things off. Pope Sixtus IV tried to introduce a reform in 1475, but his efforts were thwarted by the untimely (and unfortunately timed) death of the mathematician Johannes Müller von Königsberg (a.k.a. Regiomontanus).
In 1545, the Council of Trent authorized another attempt at calendar reform – this time to return Easter celebrations to the same time they had been observed in 325 AD and also to ensure no future drift. Progress was slow. Several decades passed before proposals were solicited from outside of the Church. The adopted proposal was a modification of one submitted by Aloysius Lilius (a.k.a. Luigi Lilio and Luigi Giglio). It corrected the length of the year, changed the duration between and occurrences of leap years, and required the deletion of ten days in order to reset.
Granted, the days didn’t actually disappear. In reality, they were still there; just renamed / renumbered. This “deletion of days” would occur at different times throughout the year and over the years – even as recently as 2016 – and, as the drift continued for countries still using the Julian calendar, sometimes were as many as 14. When these dates pop up on our current calendar, I like to think of them as “extra days,” like a little bit of lagniappe that we’ve been given. And, of course, I ask the question, “How could I spend this extra bit of time?”
“i thank You God for most this amazing day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything which is natural which is infinite which is yes”
– quoted from “i thank You God for most this amazing” by e e cummings
So, nothing happened in certain countries in 1582. But, in 1894, the author of some of my favorite poems was born. Edward Estlin Cummings (a.k.a. “E. E. Cummings” or “e e cummings”) was born in Cambridge, Massachusetts – which had been a British colony when Great Britain and its colonies switched calendars in 1752. In addition to at least 2900 poems, he wrote essays, four plays, and two autobiographical novels. He also painted. Cummings grew up in a Unitarian household (his father was a well known professor and minister) and he was exposed to a variety of philosophers.
Not surprisingly, his affinity to nature combined with his creativity and exposure to different philosophical and theological thinking led him to believe in the inherent goodness of people and nature: distinctly transcendental beliefs. He also developed an Ich und Du relationship with God that resulted in many poems and journal entries which are nothing less than prayers. He wrote about his service in the Norton-Harjes Ambulance Corps, about being arrested and detained by the French military (for suspicion of espionage), and his service in the United States Army. It was his father’s death, however, that marked a pivot in how his poetry addressed life and the time we spend living it.
“i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)“
– quoted from “[i carry your heart with me(I carry it in)]” by e e cummings
Please join me today (Wednesday, October 14th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.
In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible, class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)
“We become what we love and who we love shapes what we become. If we love things, we become a thing. If we love nothing, we become nothing. Imitation is not a literal mimicking of Christ, rather it means becoming the image of the beloved, an image disclosed through transformation. This means we are to become vessels of God’s compassionate love for others.”
– The old saying “Gam zeh ya’avor,“ in Hebrew (with Persian and Jewish origins)
“It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: ‘And this, too, shall pass away.’ How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! — how consoling in the depths of affliction!”
– Abraham Lincoln speaking to the Wisconsin State Agriculture Society at the Wisconsin State Fair, September 30, 1859
There’s an old saying in Hebrew, “Gam zeh ya’avor. This too shall pass,” that is often associated with a very wise Rabbi of old and also with King Solomon (although the words do not appear in the Bible) and has origins in Persian and Sufi poetry. American historians may hear the words and think of Abraham Lincoln speaking at the Wisconsin State Fair a year before he was elected president – although, he would end his speech with a bit of caveat, saying that he hoped the best things lasted. I think of my grandmother saying those words, a lot, but also of (what I was taught was) a Chinese parable.
In the parable, a farmer reacts to everything that happens to him (and around him) with the words, “We’ll see.” While others get excited for what they believe to be his good fortunate or agitated over what they perceive as unfortunate events, the farmer maintains a steady outlook and an understanding that all things are connected: every beginning is an ending and every ending is a beginning. As the parable progresses, the reader (and the farmer’s neighbors) start to recognize the wisdom in his attitude. Of course, in real life it is a little harder to let go of our desires and accept the present moment. Harder still is appreciating the present moment without judgment. The hardest thing, however, is to be open to appreciating whatever comes.
“Be joyful at your festival – you and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maid-servant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow who live within your city.
For seven days you must celebrate the Festival to YHVH*, your God, in the place which YHVH* shall choose, because the Lord, your God, will bless you in all your produce, and in all the work of your hands, and you will only be happy.”
(*NOTE: YHVH is commonly translated as “the Lord” in English.)
– quoted from Devarim – Deuteronomy (16:14 – 15)
Five years ago, almost to the day, I was so excited about all the things happening for me. Personally, professionally, and even spiritually, I was riding a high. I would like to think that, in the moment, I truly appreciated everything and everyone around me. I especially would like to think that considering that one of the highlights of that week was co-leading my first weekend-long Sukkot retreat in Darwin, MN, with Sandra Razieli. Sukkot is sometimes referred to as “the Season of Happiness” and there is an extra focus on gratitude. The thing is when I look back, and keep in mind how things changed after that retreat; I realize I wasn’t practicing what I preached. Yes, I was appreciating people and things in the present moment – but I was also attached to how I wanted them to continue.
As is stated in the Hebrew Bible and the Christian Old Testament, there is a period of time – after the harvest – when people are commanded to celebrate. The curious thing is that the passage related to the “Festival of the Booths” or “Festival of the Tabernacles” does not instruct people to celebrate the harvest they just brought in from the fields. Instead, people are commanded to gather and celebrate what will be. So, in some ways, the holiday which the Jewish community began observing last night at sunset, is all about having faith that not only will things pass, but that how things change will be a blessing. “Gam zeu tovah,” is another Hebrew saying. It means, “This too is for the good.”
– “From purity/cleanliness arises sensitivity to the unclean nature of one’s own body and [physical] unmixing.”
Yoga Sūtra 2.41: sattvaśuddhisaumanasyaikāgreyendriyayātmadarśanayogyatvāni ca
– “[From purity/cleanliness arises] pure wisdom of the heart, cheerfulness of mind, the power of concentration, victory over the senses, and the ability to directly experience our Self.”
Normally, when Sukkot rolls around, I am super excited to talk about yoga sūtra 2.42 and the how the second niyamā (“internal observation”) connects to the practice of gratitude and the emotional experience of happiness. However, we are not there yet. There is a preliminary practice, which actually gives us two sūtras on which we will focus. Part of me, was like, “Oo, they are short and connected.” Another part of me remembered something we kept saying back in 2015: “Don’t be greedy, be grateful.”
Please join me for a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, October 3rd) at 12:00 PM.You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (Look for “Sukkot 1+”)YouTube
You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email me at myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
### Sunshine, the practice, friends (and family) ###
“‘For a righteous man can fall seven times and rise, but the wicked shall stumble upon evil.’”
– Mishlei – Proverbs (24:16)
Here we are again. We spent some time “remembering, reflecting, repenting, and planning.” We were inspired and filled with momentum, ready for better days… And then, the inevitable happens: we fall, we stumble, we trip; we fail. We may be all the way back to square one or squarely behind the 8-ball; either way, we have a moment where we feel like we suck and it sucks to be us.
But, here’s the thing. Everyone fails. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone has a setback. Think of Thomas Edison who famously said that he had had not failed 10,000; he hadn’t even failed once. He said, instead, “I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” That right there is the perspective of a man who gets up. That right there is the resilient attitude of a person who learns not only from “mistakes,” but also from things just not going according to their plan. The lesson for today, however, is more than just about our character being defined by what happens IF we fall – cause, come on, we’re going to fall. The lesson is even about more than how we rise back up. Today is also about how we respond when someone else falls and how we set ourselves up for success.
“‘When your enemy falls, do not rejoice, and when he stumbles, let your heart not exult, lest the Lord see and be displeased, and turn His wrath away from him. Do not compete with evildoers; do not envy the wicked’”
– Mishlei – Proverbs (24:17 -19)
In his podcast, Armchair Expert, the actor Dax Shepard recently admitted that he had fallen off the wagon after 16 years of sobriety. No, he did not go back to imbibing his drugs of choice – and that’s a blessing and a reason to celebrate – but he did start running (backwards) down a slippery slope. As he details in the podcast, his slip came with all the bad behavior of someone who had never been sober… and all the hubris of someone who had spent almost 2 decades actively being sober. The podcast episode was recorded right at the beginning of the high holidays; so (in my head), it’s cool that he started the new year doing exactly what is recommended to wipe the slate clean. What’s kind of gut wrenching to hear, as he talks about owning up to his mistakes and asking forgiveness from his wife, Kristen Bell, as well as from his podcast co-host, Monica Padman, and all his friends is how much time he spent twisting the poisoned arrow (and the second arrow).
Remember, in Buddhism there are two parables about arrows. In the case of the poisoned arrow, a man is shot with a poisoned arrow while surrounded by people who want to help save his life. The man, however, is so focused on why his shot (and all the particulars about the person that shot him) that the poison seeps into his bloodstream and kills him. In the story about the second arrow, the Buddha points out that when a person is shot by one arrow after the other (both non-poisonous), the first arrow represents physical pain; while the second arrow is the emotional and mental suffering we add to the experience. Dax Shepard admitted he spent a lot of time not being honest simply because of his comparison to others, the possible judgment of others, and the fact that he didn’t want to “lose” the accomplishment of all those years of sobriety. To his credit, he is figuring out a way to let the people around him help him. To his credit, he is figuring out the blessing of gratitude. His story may be more dramatic than ours and may have more public details, but we’ve all been in situations where we thought we had something figured out and then…. Oops, not so much.
There is yet another piece to (t)his story. It involves the homonyms “fell” and “fail.” Think for a moment about how admitting that we “fell” puts the events firmly in the past and allows us to focus on the present, as it moves into the future. When we use the word “fail” we get stuck. Because it is in the present tense – and, even when conjugated, can feel very active – we may focus on past events as if they are our present, future, and forever condition. Take a moment, to consider what happens when we put the falling in the past and rise up. Yes, life (or people) may knock us down again, but in this moment there is a lesson about how to do things differently.
“My fears were the opposite of what the result was.”
– Dax Shepard, quoted from an Armchair Expert episode “Day 7” (recorded September 21, 2020)
Please join metoday (Tuesday, September 29th) at 12 Noon or 7:15 PM for a virtual yoga practice on Zoom, where we will do what we do. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
“Gentlemen, there are three things which belong to God and which do not belong to man: the irrevocable, the irreparable, the indissoluble. Woe to man if he introduces them into his laws! (Movement.) Sooner or later they cause society to bend under their weight, they disturb the necessary balance of laws and customs, they deprive human justice of its proportions; and then this happens, think about it, gentlemen, that the law terrifies the conscience. (Sensation.)”
— quoted from Victor Hugo’s address to the French Constituent (General) Assembly, September 15, 1848
“Love is like a tree: it grows by itself, roots itself deeply in our being and continues to flourish over a heart in ruin. The inexplicable fact is that the blinder it is, the more tenacious it is. It is never stronger than when it is completely unreasonable.”
— quoted from The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo
Consider Victor Hugo the tail end of the story… or the braid.
On the best of days, explaining the beginning of an idea is like pointing to the beginning of French braid wreath or the beginning of an ensō. I can point to a section of my very thick, very curly hair and explain that I separated this section from that and that section from this one and then started braiding them together as I, simultaneously, pulled in extra pieces from here and here…
But that leaves out the fact that first I had to wash and comb out my very thick, very curl, and very unprocessed hair. Still, even if we skip the part about where and when I learned how to braid my hair, we can repeat the steps above and get a different result every time. Sometimes it’s a relatively easy, even meditative process. Other times it is super frustrating and, after starting and stopping half a dozen times, I may or may not finish it the way I originally intended. I mean, let’s be real; sometimes it’s just going to be a scarf, bandana, or baseball cap day.
I say all this to explain that while I can definitely say that today’s class was influenced by that age old discussion of right and wrong (that so many are debating right now) and there are definitely the reverberations of some of the links embedded above. In some ways, today’s class theme started with yesterday’s class theme — but only if you go back to September 14, 2016.
“The heart becomes heroic through passion. It is no longer composed of anything but what is pure; it no longer rests upon anything but what is elevated and great.”
— quoted from Les Misérables by Victor Hugo
Yesterday was the anniversary of the birth of Dr. Ivan Pavlov (sort of) and also the date when Francis Scott Key penned the poem, “The Defence of Fort M’Henry”, that would eventually be combined with an English drinking song in order to become America’s national anthem. In my September 14, 2016 classes, at the Downtown Minneapolis YMCA and Nokomis Yoga, I used the national anthem as an example of a habit we had developed as a nation without really giving it much thought. Keep in mind that in August of that year, Colin Kaepernick had started sitting — and then kneeling — during the national anthem as a form of political protest. Neither he nor those who joined him in the NFL protest were protesting the flag or people who had served in the military, but their actions caused a great deal of uproar nevertheless. While, they had given some thought to why (they thought) that would be an appropriate time and place to protest, my point in bringing it up in class was that other people (most people) weren’t looking at the context, in part, because of the habit of “honoring the flag” with that particular song and in a very specific way. The habit was (and is) so deeply engrained it is part of people’s asmitā (sense of I-am-ness, which is the second affliction) and to question it (or even consider it in its entirety) activates people’s abhiniveśah (“fear of death”, which is the fifth affliction.)The song and the ritual around it are, I suggested, create a Pavlovian response and (to some) altering the tradition in any way, shape, or form is akin to threatening death.
“Try as you will, you cannot annihilate that eternal relic of the human heart, love.”
— Victor Hugo
Fast forward to 2020, and the country is (in some ways) even more polarized. So, when I got ready for my Monday class, I debated making the connection. It was a different audience, a different medium, and a different time — so I considered the merit; weighed the possibility of there being more good, in the reference, than harm. Even as I started the class, I was still carrying on that internal debate (which is why there’s no reference in yesterday’s blog post). Ultimately, I decided to end with the reference – and buddy, am I glad I did!
“Our mind is enriched by what we receive, our heart by what we give.”
— Victor Hugo
After class, a friend who is a music teacher told me about a composer and University of Minnesota professor, Abbie Betinis, who inverted the music for the “Star Spangled Banner”. The composition is pretty brilliant. It adds a timbre and tone that, if anything, highlight the weight of what Scott Key witnessed and all the battles that have led us up to today. I immediately started thinking about how we look at things from a different perspective when we (or the things) are upside down and backwards. Ms. Betinis (who has a January birthday) has a catalog of beautiful music, including a song inspired by a poem by Victor Hugo (who has a February birthday).
And it was right around this time that I realized Victor Hugo had been following me around… for days!
He was in conversations about “the republic” and underscoring contemplation about right and wrong, morals versus ethics versus laws. And he was in a friend’s Twitter feed (which is totally random, ‘cause y’all know I’m not on Twitter). Then I started delving into the speeches he made to the French Constituent Assembly and, in particular, to the speech he made today in 1848 calling for the abolition of the death penalty.
“I regret that this question, perhaps the first of all, arrives in the midst of your deliberations almost out of the blue, and surprises unprepared speakers.
As for me, I will say few words, but they will start from the feeling of a deep and ancient conviction.”
“Well, think about it, what is the death penalty? The death penalty is the special and eternal sign of barbarism. (Movement.) Wherever the death penalty is lavished, barbarism dominates; wherever the death penalty is rare, civilization reigns. (Sensation.)
Gentlemen, these are indisputable facts. The softening of the penalty is a big and serious step forward. Part of its glory, the eighteenth century, abolished torture; the nineteenth century will abolish the death penalty. (Cheers! Yes! Yes! )”
— quoted from Victor Hugo’s address to the French Constituent (General) Assembly, September 15, 1848
And it got me thinking about Victor Hugo as an activist and as a writer of social commentary. It got me thinking about all the struggles, trials and tribulations, and suffering found in his fiction – but also how there is always, always love. Despite the most horrible of odds, there is love. And, finally, it got me thinking about how any one of us is responding/reacting to all the mayhem, civil disobedience, civil unrest, and isolation we are currently encountering — and how we might react differently if we were a character in a Victor Hugo novel…or poem. Or, for that matter, how we might react if we were Victor Hugo, himself. How we can we stay true to ourselves even when “the bough is slight” or we are on shaky ground?
“Be like the bird, who Pausing in his flight On limb too slight Feels it give way beneath him Yet sings Knowing he has wings.”
— “Be like the bird” poem by Victor Hugo
Keep in mind, that some of this will not be evident in the class. Keep in mind, also, that my hair is super curly and super thick. So, when I braid my hair, all I have to do to keep all these threads together is keep joining everything together until I reach the end. Violá! Yoga (Union).
You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
“I feel in myself the future life. I am like a forest once cut down; the new shoots are stronger and livelier than ever. I am rising, I know, toward the sky. The sunshine is on my head. The earth gives me its generous sap, but heaven lights me with reflection of unknown worlds. You say the soul is nothing but the resultant of the bodily powers. Why, then, is my soul more luminous when my bodily powers begin to fail? Winter is on my head, but eternal spring is in my heart.”
— quoted from essay on Immortality by Victor Hugo (published in Sacramento Daily Union, March 16, 1882)
“The future belongs to hearts even more than it does to minds.”
— quoted from Les Misérables by Victor Hugo
2025: Some formatting revised.
### “To love another is to see the face of God.” (Les Mis, VH) ###
“Love is the only way to rescue humanity from all ills, and in it you too have the only method of saving your people from enslavement. In very ancient times love was proclaimed with special strength and clearness among your people to be the religious basis of human life.”
– quoted from section V of “A Letter to a Hindu” by Leo Tolstoy (dated 12/14/1908)
Consider that if you practice ahimsā (“non-harming” or “non-violence”) and satya (a dedication to “truth”), there are times when telling the brutal honest truth, creates harm. So, the questions become (1) how to mitigate the harm – while also being dedicated to the truth – and (2) how to be honest without telling the truth. Someone who would have strived to find the balance was Leo Tolstoy who, in my humble opinion, sometimes failed miserably to find the balance.
Going by the Gregorian calendar, Leo Tolstoy was born today in 1828. He was born into nobility near Tula, Russia and, in many ways, his story could mirror that of Prince Siddhartha’s story of enlightenment… if it weren’t for those pesky trips to the brothel. Yes, born into wealth and privilege, Tolstoy indulged himself. Then he fell in love and very quickly married the 18-year old Sophia Behrs, the daughter of a court physician. There was a difference in their social status and a 16-year age difference; however, those were not the problems. Their marital strife started before they even got married when, under the guise of full disclosure, Tolstoy forced Sophia to read his diaries – filled with his sexual exploits – the night before their wedding. In a similar vein, he would later tell his favorite daughter Maria, known as “Masha,” that although it was sad that she had experienced another failed birth, “it is clearly a benefit to your spiritual life.”
Yeah, Tolstoy kinda sucked like that.
He was also, by all accounts, incredibly moody.
If you only know of Tolstoy as the Nobel Prize nominated author of giant Russian novels that many consider the greatest literature ever written, then my earlier statement about his story mirroring the Buddha’s story may come as a surprise – especially given his interpersonal skills as described above.
I completely understand if, given the above information, you don’t want to read anything more. (Especially considering the fact that I don’t think the rest of the story redeems him.) Here’s the thing though: Tolstoy spent much of his adult life in the middle of a spiritual crisis and his efforts to resolve this crisis led him to “start” a spiritual movement that inspired people from all over the world – including Mahatma Gandhi, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., & Rev. James Bevel. Gandhi even named a spiritual settlement in South Africa after Tolstoy.
“I believe that such a time has now arrived—not in the sense that it has come in the year 1908, but that the inherent contradiction of human life has now reached an extreme degree of tension: on the one side there is the consciousness of the beneficence of the law of love, and on the other the existing order of life which has for centuries occasioned an empty, anxious, restless, and troubled mode of life, conflicting as it does with the law of love and built on the use of violence. This contradiction must be faced, and the solution will evidently not be favourable to the outlived law of violence, but to the truth which has dwelt in the hearts of men from remote antiquity: the truth that the law of love is in accord with the nature of man.
But men can only recognize this truth to its full extent when they have completely freed themselves from all religious and scientific superstitions and from all the consequent misrepresentations and sophistical distortions by which its recognition has been hindered for centuries.”
– quoted from section VI of “A Letter to a Hindu” by Leo Tolstoy (dated 12/14/1908)
But, I’m jumping ahead. So, let’s back up a minute. Before we get to the part where Leo Tolstoy was rooted in pacifism and Christian anarchism, we have to go back…even before the brothels.
At an early age, Tolstoy’s teacher wrote him off as not being too smart. Yet, he taught himself twelve languages. His brother suggested that he enlist in the army and also encouraged him to write. The fighting that he saw at the front during the Crimean War, combined with an execution he witness in Paris (1857), and his brother’s death around 1859, caused Tolstoy to question his faith and his place in the world. In particular, he questioned “superstitious belief in progress,” which led to a moral crisis and spiritual awakening.
Part of his questioning led him to the desire to marry and have a family. His marriage with Sophia, while full of conflict, was instrumental in the completion and publication of the novel “1805,” which was renamed War and Peace. Sophia Tolstoya rewrote each revision of the novel by hand. She wrote out the entire novel eight times in seven years, although she had to rewrite some sections 30 times – all while giving birth to four of their 13 children and taking care of the day-to-day operations of their home and business affairs. Despite their personal conflicts (which included Tolstoy’s insistence that she continue having children even after a doctor said it was detrimental to her health), Tolstoya continued to support her husband’s literary efforts throughout their marriage.
The couple’s ultimate split occurred after their estate was essentially turned into a de-facto settlement for “Tolstoyans” (who wanted to be closer to their “spiritual leader”) and Sophia Tolstoya demanded Tolstoy sign over control of his publishing royalties (because she feared he would bankrupt the family). The ultimate split between the couple caused quite a public scandal, but that’s towards the end of the story. In between, there were the novels (including Anna Karenina, which Tolstoy considered his “first novel”). The Kingdom of God is Within You (the title of which references John 17:21), a series of short stories collected under the title What Men Live By (which includes more questions), and his 1908 “Letter to a Hindu” (addressed to Tarak Nath Das).
“All that exists is One. People only call this One by different names. ~The Vedas
God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. ~ 1 John 4:16
God is one whole; we are the parts. ~ Exposition of the teaching of the Vedas by Vivekananda”
– quoted from “A Letter to a Hindu” by Leo Tolstoy (dated 12/14/1908)
All of Leo Tolstoy’s work can come under that heading of “what men live by.” The Kingdom of God is Within You highlights Jesus’ teaching to turn the other cheek. It also questions what Tolstoy viewed as hypocrisy, corruption, and moral contradictions within organized religion. Although it was banned in Russia, it was published in Germany several years after Tolstoy was placed under police surveillance by the czarist government and excommunicated by the Russian Orthodox Church. “A Letter to a Hindu” draws quotes from a plethora of sacred text and shows the parallels between religious traditions many people may not realize have shared teachings.
There’s more to the story, of course there is more, but just this little bit brings up the original questions above plus some particular to the author: Was Tolstoy the ultimate hypocrite? Is he the perfect cautionary tale? Did he spend his life becoming/being what he most despised and criticized?
Then, there are the questions that, perhaps, you have found yourself asking over the last few years: Do we disregard the message/teaching because of the messenger’s bad behavior? Should we excuse bad behavior because nobody is perfect, but some people have good intentions? How much should someone be condemned if they are doing their best to work towards a better world, but their bad (suffering-causing) behavior is rooted in years of privilege?
At each point, I think we have to come back to the beginning: ahimsā and satya. At each point, we have to turn inward and ask ourselves: What creates the least amount of harm while simultaneously allowing us to maintain our dedication to the truth?
“Undisturbed calmness of mind is attained by cultivating feelings of friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and indifference toward the wicked [ or non-virtuous].”
– quoted from How to Know God: The Yoga Aphorisms of Patanjali (1.33), translated and with commentary by Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher Isherwood
“As soon as men live entirely in accord with the law of love natural to their hearts and now revealed to them, which excludes all resistance by violence, and therefore hold aloof from all participation in violence —as soon as this happens, not only will hundreds be unable to enslave millions, but not even millions will be able to enslave a single individual. Do not resist the evil-doer and take no part in doing so, either in the violent deeds of the administration, in the law courts, the collection of taxes, or above all in soldiering, and no one in the world will be able to enslave you.”
– quoted from section V of “A Letter to a Hindu” by Leo Tolstoy (dated 12/14/1908)
Please join me today (Wednesday, September 9th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom (featuring “Three Questions,” one of Tolstoy’s short stories). Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.
“O ye who sit in bondage and continually seek and pant for freedom, seek only for love. Love is peace in itself and peace which gives complete satisfaction. I am the key that opens the portal to the rarely discovered land where contentment alone is found.” ~KRISHNA.
– quoted from section VI of “A Letter to a Hindu” by Leo Tolstoy (dated 12/14/1908)
Listen. Do that 90-second thing. Just for a moment, be still and be quiet.
Notice what you hear.
Notice what you see.
Notice what you feel.
Because, as long as you are alive, these things are always happening.
“Everything we do is music.”
“The world is teeming; anything can happen.”
– John Cage
We refer to the absence of something as nothing, but in actuality there is always something. Our understanding of nothing or emptiness is based on our perception and awareness of the truth. Zen Buddhism, which John Cage practiced, focuses on self-restraint, meditation, insight into the nature of the mind and the nature of things, and the personal expression of this insight – especially as it benefits others. This, truly, parallels the focus of the yoga philosophy. It’s tricky, cagey even; however, if we pay attention we start to notice that the truth about nothing leads to the truth about everything – and Patanjali tells us that being dedicated to to the truth leads to everything.
– “When a yogi is established in truthfulness, actions begin to bear fruit. [Truth is the foundation for fruitful action.]”
Born today in 1912, John Cage was an artist and composer who’s most well-known work is often misinterpreted. Even as musicians – even heavy metal musicians – who understand the piece take it on, there is often a level of interpretation and improvisation that changes the tenure of the piece. Some say Mr. Cage would approve of such things. Others say otherwise, but the truth of the matter is that he was a student not only of art and music, but also of Zen Buddhism, Indian philosophy, chance, and (yes) improvisation. He turned more towards music than art because more people commented on his music and, in some ways, music was harder for him. He combined his two art forms by composing music for “prepared piano,” a piano that had been altered with blocks, pins, and other objects – and essentially turned into a percussion instrument. He also collaboration with his partner Merce Cunningham, the choreographer, and spent years composing via the I Ching, a resource for divination.
Divination comes from the Latin word for “to foresee, to foretell, to predict, to prophesy” and, it is related to the Latin word for “divine,” it can be translated as “to be inspired by God.” It is, like randomly opening a page in the Bible or your favorite book, a way to gain insight into a particular situation. The I Ching or Book of Changes (sometimes translated as Classic of Changes) is an ancient resource for Chinese divination and one of the oldest Chinese classics. It became one of the “Five Classics” in the 2nd Century B.C. and has provided influenced art, literature, philosophy, and religion around the world since the Western Zhou period (1000 – 750 B. C.).
The text is the primary reference for interpreting a sequence of hexagrams which can be formed with numbers or by throwing coins containing the symbols for “yin” (a broken line) or “yang” (an unbroken line). Just like other users of Chinese divination, John Cage would form a question, throw the coins, and then create a musical interpretation of the resulting hexagon sequence and its corresponding message. While he had previously composed “by chance,” using the I Ching became his standard method of composing music after one of his students gave him a copy of the sacred text in 1951. In a 1957 lecture, he described music as “purposeless play” and “a way of waking up to the very life we’re living.”
“If something is boring after 2 minutes, try it for 4. If still boring, then 8. Then 16. Then 38. Eventually one discovers that it is not boring at all.”
– John Cage
It was also in 1951 that Mr. Cage had two other highly influential experiences. His friend and colleague Robert Rauschenberg produced a series of white paintings which appeared to be “blank” canvases, but which actually changed based on lighting and the shadows of the people viewing them. Around this same time, Mr. Cage spent some time in an anechoic chamber at Harvard University. The chamber was designed so that every part of the room absorbed sound, rather than reflecting it, so that it was meant to be completely silent and externally sound-proof. He expected to hear silence but, instead, he heard a high pitched sound and a low pitched sound. The engineer in charge of the room told him the high pitch was his nervous system and the low pitch was his blood circulation. Instead of silence, he was treated to the music of his own existence.
“There is no such thing as an empty space or an empty time. There is always something to see, something to hear. In fact, try as we may to make a silence, we cannot.”
– John Cage
Please join me for a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, September 5th) at 12:00 PM. You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (FAIR WARNING: The volume on these tracks is quite dynamic, more so on the Spotify list. I love this music, however, I know some folks hate it; so, feel free to “randomly” pick another list or…practice in “silence.”)
You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email me at myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
“The idea came from the idea of escaping the world, actually. For me, there’s definitely days where I feel like I’ve been overwhelmed by people, and I need to get away. So Bob Peterson, who is the lead writer and co-director, he and I were just sitting in a room thinking of ideas. And we were experimenting with this visual idea of a guy in floating house, and it just seemed really intriguing.”
– Pete Docter (b. 10/09/1968), quoted from an AV Club interview (dated 05/28/2009)
Today started with something that wasn’t magic, but it was magical. For reasons unknown to me, David Blaine and his team picked today for his YouTubes Original special Ascension. The stunt, to soar up thousands of feet with helium balloons and then parachute down, took years and planning and even more years of dreaming. Blaine kept saying he was doing it for his 9-year old daughter Dessa, but he was also doing it for everyone who has ever dreamed of flying, soaring, and floating above it all. He said it was amazing. I say that despite all the technology, and maybe because of it, it was magical – and it couldn’t have happened on a better day. Because, to me, September 2nd is all about magical dreams and the inspiring people who make them come true.
“I want to see how life can triumph.”
– Romare Bearden, Artist and Activist
The artist, author, and song writer Romare Bearden was born today in 1911. Perhaps best known for his collages, photomontages, and abstract and Cubist paintings, he originally aspired to be a cartoonist (and even supported himself, for a brief period, as a political cartoonist). While serving in the United States Army during World War II, Sergeant Bearden was part of the all-Black 372nd Infantry Division of the 15th Regiment. While I have read accounts that spent his service in the United States and other accounts saying that he served on the Western Front, one thing is not disputed: during the war, he saw mankind at its worst and he wanted, through his art, to express the humanity he felt was lacking in his wartime experiences.
“There are roads out of the secret place within us which we must all move as we go to touch others.”
– Romare Bearden, Artist and Activist
Of course, it is easy to imagine the atrocities one might have witnessed on the Western Front, but what would an all-Black infantry member experience if they served in the United States? Segregation, prejudice, racism – and this was experienced more by the domestic soldiers than those on the battlefield. While the enlisted men were Black, the officers were primarily white. In addition to the things we normally think of as being segregated during the 1940’s (housing, transportation, food service, church), especially in the South, parades and other ways people in the service were honored were also done separately. The separation and hostility included people who were part of the Officer’s Candidate School in North Carolina (like Sergeant Bearden) and meant that the Black soldiers were sometimes restricted to their bases even when they had time off.
When his service ended, Romare Bearden spent time in New York City and in Paris, where he studied philosophy and the history behind the art he had, primarily, taught himself to create. His work didn’t just depict African-American people; it showed the unity, cooperation, and collaboration within the African-American community. Along with his cousin, Private Charles H. Alston (with whom he also served in the U. S. Army), Emma Amos, Hale Woodruff, and 11 other artists of color, Sergeant Bearden founded the “Spiral” group, which discussed the responsibility of African-American artists to the Civil Rights Movement and “to consider common aesthetic problems.” It was during this same period that he began his collage work and started experiencing great success and recognition through exhibitions in major galleries and museums.
In 1984, four years before his bone cancer-related death, he was paid $90,000 for a 60×13-foot mural, entitled “Pittsburgh Recollections,” which was installed in a Pittsburgh subway station. In 2008, the mural’s value was estimated at $15 million. Two years after his death, the Romare Bearden Foundation was founded “to preserve and perpetuate the legacy of this preeminent American artist.” The non-profit foundation serves as the artist’s estate and has developed grants supporting children, young (emerging) artists, and scholars.
“If you’re offered a seat on a rocket ship, don’t ask what seat. JUST GET ON!”
– Teacher and Astronaut S Christa McAuliffe
Born today in 1948, S Christa McAuliffe was a teacher who became an astronaut – because she was a teacher. At an early age, she was inspired by the “Space Age” astronauts like John Glen. As an adult, she was chosen from over 11,000 applicants to participate in NASA’s 1985 “Teacher in Space” project. She trained to become the first teacher in space and planned to conduct experiments and teach two lesson plans on her first mission aboard the Space Shuttle Challenger. Tragically, the shuttle broke apart 73 seconds after launch killing all seven crew members on January 28, 1986. This American of Irish and Lebanese descent, who was also a mother and wife, was posthumously awarded the Congressional Space Medal of Honor (in 2004). Schools and scholarships have been named in her honor; however, her students remember her for her advice on life:
“Reach for the stars. Reach for it! Push yourself as far as you can.”
– Teacher and Astronaut S Christa McAuliffe
Canada’s first “space tourist” was born today in 1959. Known for reaching for a different kind of stars and pushing himself (and others), Cirque du Soleil co-founder and former CEO Guy Laliberté turned 61 today. He believes in having a greater purpose and in taking risks, which probably explains his penchant for poker playing, but also his success as an entertainer and producer. While he is now billionaire and one of the wealthiest Canadians in the world, he started off as just another kid inspired by the circus. He started off as a busker, a stiltwalker, and a fire-eater, but eventually became a producer.
In addition to curating one of the most innovative and entertaining performing arts companies in the world, he is one of the founders of the non-profit One Drop Foundation, which aims “to ensure sustainable access to safe water and sanitation for the most vulnerable communities through innovative partnerships, creativity and the power of art.” He called his venture into space a “poetic social mission” designed to raise awareness about water issues addressed by One Drop. The foundation’s values are respect, integrity, collaboration, innovation, and fun – the same elements you need for a good circus. Mr. Laliberté said, “Inside every adult there’s still a child that lingers. We’re happiness merchants giving people the opportunity to dream like children.” Of course, to encourage others to dream, one has to dream big; always, always, always, believe in the dream; and have the resources to make it so.
“I am blessed for what I have, but I believed in it from the beginning. Today the dream is the same: I still want to travel, I still want to entertain, and I most certainly want to have fun.”
– Guy Laliberté, Cirque du Soleil co-founder, polker player, and Activist
“Life is tough, and if you have the ability to laugh at it, you have the ability to enjoy it.”
– Salma Hayek, Actor, Director, Producer, and Activist
If I didn’t have all the other birthday people to honor, but I wanted to get across the same advice and inspiration, I would defer to a Mexican-American woman who stands not quite two inches taller than me. Born today in 1966, Salma Valgarma Hayek Jiménez, now Salma Hayak Pinault began her career in the award-winning telenovela Teresa. By 25, she had won an Ariel Award (the Mexican equivalent of an Academy Award) and was ready to take on Hollywood, where she would receive more accolades and critical acclaim. She has appeared in sitcoms, children’s specials, and every imaginable genre of movies.
In 2002, Salma Hayek produced and starred in Frida, a biography of Mexican artist Frida Kahlo, which was directed by Julie Taymor. In addition to paying tribute to her Mexican heritage with Frida, honored her Lebanese heritage by producing (and voicing the character Kamila) the animated movie Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet. As she continuously racks up awards and nominations for her work as an actor and producer, she has also modeled; worked as an official spokeswoman for Avon and Revlon cosmetics; and worked with Proctor & Gamble Company, in collaboration with UNICEF, to promote the funding of maternal and neonatal tetanus vaccines. She practices yoga and has developed a juice delivery program and her own brand of cosmetics.
In addition to all this and more, Ms. Hayek has had overcome dyslexia, navigated America’s immigration system to become a naturalized citizen, and overcame sexual assault and harassment during one of the high points of her career. Her personal experiences are part of the reason she works to increase awareness about violence against women (even testifying before the United States Senate to support the Violence Against Women Act), donates to anti-domestic abuse shelters and groups (in the United States and Mexico), and is a breastfeeding advocate who once breastfeed a newborn in Sierra Leone when the baby’s mother could not produce milk. She once said, “What is important is to believe in something so strongly that you’re not discouraged.” Inspiring words, for sure! However, I always follow another bit of her advice….
“I act tall!”
– Salma Hayek, Actor, Director, Producer, and Activist
Please join me today (Wednesday, September 2nd) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a magical-birthday inspired yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
Wednesday’s playlist is available is available on YouTube and Spotify. (The practice music is the same, but one playlist includes David Blaine’s Ascension and the other includes Romare Bearden’s “Sea Breeze.”)
“People often say that ‘beauty is in the eye of the beholder,’ and I say that the most liberating thing about beauty is realizing that you are the beholder. This empowers us to find beauty in places where others have not dared to look, including inside ourselves.”
– Salma Hayek, Actor, Director, Producer, and Activist
Format updated and quote added 09/2023.
### REACH FOR THE STARS! HAVE FUN. ACT TALL. BEHOLD… & LIFE WILL TRIUMPH ###
A Joyful Practice 