– The old saying “Gam zeh ya’avor,“ in Hebrew (with Persian and Jewish origins)
“It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: ‘And this, too, shall pass away.’ How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! — how consoling in the depths of affliction!”
– Abraham Lincoln speaking to the Wisconsin State Agriculture Society at the Wisconsin State Fair, September 30, 1859
There’s an old saying in Hebrew, “Gam zeh ya’avor. This too shall pass,” that is often associated with a very wise Rabbi of old and also with King Solomon (although the words do not appear in the Bible) and has origins in Persian and Sufi poetry. American historians may hear the words and think of Abraham Lincoln speaking at the Wisconsin State Fair a year before he was elected president – although, he would end his speech with a bit of caveat, saying that he hoped the best things lasted. I think of my grandmother saying those words, a lot, but also of (what I was taught was) a Chinese parable.
In the parable, a farmer reacts to everything that happens to him (and around him) with the words, “We’ll see.” While others get excited for what they believe to be his good fortunate or agitated over what they perceive as unfortunate events, the farmer maintains a steady outlook and an understanding that all things are connected: every beginning is an ending and every ending is a beginning. As the parable progresses, the reader (and the farmer’s neighbors) start to recognize the wisdom in his attitude. Of course, in real life it is a little harder to let go of our desires and accept the present moment. Harder still is appreciating the present moment without judgment. The hardest thing, however, is to be open to appreciating whatever comes.
“Be joyful at your festival – you and your son, and your daughter, and your manservant, and your maid-servant, and the Levite, and the stranger, and the orphan, and the widow who live within your city.
For seven days you must celebrate the Festival to YHVH*, your God, in the place which YHVH* shall choose, because the Lord, your God, will bless you in all your produce, and in all the work of your hands, and you will only be happy.”
(*NOTE: YHVH is commonly translated as “the Lord” in English.)
– quoted from Devarim – Deuteronomy (16:14 – 15)
Five years ago, almost to the day, I was so excited about all the things happening for me. Personally, professionally, and even spiritually, I was riding a high. I would like to think that, in the moment, I truly appreciated everything and everyone around me. I especially would like to think that considering that one of the highlights of that week was co-leading my first weekend-long Sukkot retreat in Darwin, MN, with Sandra Razieli. Sukkot is sometimes referred to as “the Season of Happiness” and there is an extra focus on gratitude. The thing is when I look back, and keep in mind how things changed after that retreat; I realize I wasn’t practicing what I preached. Yes, I was appreciating people and things in the present moment – but I was also attached to how I wanted them to continue.
As is stated in the Hebrew Bible and the Christian Old Testament, there is a period of time – after the harvest – when people are commanded to celebrate. The curious thing is that the passage related to the “Festival of the Booths” or “Festival of the Tabernacles” does not instruct people to celebrate the harvest they just brought in from the fields. Instead, people are commanded to gather and celebrate what will be. So, in some ways, the holiday which the Jewish community began observing last night at sunset, is all about having faith that not only will things pass, but that how things change will be a blessing. “Gam zeu tovah,” is another Hebrew saying. It means, “This too is for the good.”
– “From purity/cleanliness arises sensitivity to the unclean nature of one’s own body and [physical] unmixing.”
Yoga Sūtra 2.41: sattvaśuddhisaumanasyaikāgreyendriyayātmadarśanayogyatvāni ca
– “[From purity/cleanliness arises] pure wisdom of the heart, cheerfulness of mind, the power of concentration, victory over the senses, and the ability to directly experience our Self.”
Normally, when Sukkot rolls around, I am super excited to talk about yoga sūtra 2.42 and the how the second niyamā (“internal observation”) connects to the practice of gratitude and the emotional experience of happiness. However, we are not there yet. There is a preliminary practice, which actually gives us two sūtras on which we will focus. Part of me, was like, “Oo, they are short and connected.” Another part of me remembered something we kept saying back in 2015: “Don’t be greedy, be grateful.”
Please join me for a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, October 3rd) at 12:00 PM.You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (Look for “Sukkot 1+”)YouTube
You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email me at myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
### Sunshine, the practice, friends (and family) ###
“Gentlemen, there are three things which belong to God and which do not belong to man: the irrevocable, the irreparable, the indissoluble. Woe to man if he introduces them into his laws! (Movement.) Sooner or later they cause society to bend under their weight, they disturb the necessary balance of laws and customs, they deprive human justice of its proportions; and then this happens, think about it, gentlemen, that the law terrifies the conscience. (Sensation.)”
— quoted from Victor Hugo’s address to the French Constituent (General) Assembly, September 15, 1848
“Love is like a tree: it grows by itself, roots itself deeply in our being and continues to flourish over a heart in ruin. The inexplicable fact is that the blinder it is, the more tenacious it is. It is never stronger than when it is completely unreasonable.”
— quoted from The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo
Consider Victor Hugo the tail end of the story… or the braid.
On the best of days, explaining the beginning of an idea is like pointing to the beginning of French braid wreath or the beginning of an ensō. I can point to a section of my very thick, very curly hair and explain that I separated this section from that and that section from this one and then started braiding them together as I, simultaneously, pulled in extra pieces from here and here…
But that leaves out the fact that first I had to wash and comb out my very thick, very curl, and very unprocessed hair. Still, even if we skip the part about where and when I learned how to braid my hair, we can repeat the steps above and get a different result every time. Sometimes it’s a relatively easy, even meditative process. Other times it is super frustrating and, after starting and stopping half a dozen times, I may or may not finish it the way I originally intended. I mean, let’s be real; sometimes it’s just going to be a scarf, bandana, or baseball cap day.
I say all this to explain that while I can definitely say that today’s class was influenced by that age old discussion of right and wrong (that so many are debating right now) and there are definitely the reverberations of some of the links embedded above. In some ways, today’s class theme started with yesterday’s class theme — but only if you go back to September 14, 2016.
“The heart becomes heroic through passion. It is no longer composed of anything but what is pure; it no longer rests upon anything but what is elevated and great.”
— quoted from Les Misérables by Victor Hugo
Yesterday was the anniversary of the birth of Dr. Ivan Pavlov (sort of) and also the date when Francis Scott Key penned the poem, “The Defence of Fort M’Henry”, that would eventually be combined with an English drinking song in order to become America’s national anthem. In my September 14, 2016 classes, at the Downtown Minneapolis YMCA and Nokomis Yoga, I used the national anthem as an example of a habit we had developed as a nation without really giving it much thought. Keep in mind that in August of that year, Colin Kaepernick had started sitting — and then kneeling — during the national anthem as a form of political protest. Neither he nor those who joined him in the NFL protest were protesting the flag or people who had served in the military, but their actions caused a great deal of uproar nevertheless. While, they had given some thought to why (they thought) that would be an appropriate time and place to protest, my point in bringing it up in class was that other people (most people) weren’t looking at the context, in part, because of the habit of “honoring the flag” with that particular song and in a very specific way. The habit was (and is) so deeply engrained it is part of people’s asmitā (sense of I-am-ness, which is the second affliction) and to question it (or even consider it in its entirety) activates people’s abhiniveśah (“fear of death”, which is the fifth affliction.)The song and the ritual around it are, I suggested, create a Pavlovian response and (to some) altering the tradition in any way, shape, or form is akin to threatening death.
“Try as you will, you cannot annihilate that eternal relic of the human heart, love.”
— Victor Hugo
Fast forward to 2020, and the country is (in some ways) even more polarized. So, when I got ready for my Monday class, I debated making the connection. It was a different audience, a different medium, and a different time — so I considered the merit; weighed the possibility of there being more good, in the reference, than harm. Even as I started the class, I was still carrying on that internal debate (which is why there’s no reference in yesterday’s blog post). Ultimately, I decided to end with the reference – and buddy, am I glad I did!
“Our mind is enriched by what we receive, our heart by what we give.”
— Victor Hugo
After class, a friend who is a music teacher told me about a composer and University of Minnesota professor, Abbie Betinis, who inverted the music for the “Star Spangled Banner”. The composition is pretty brilliant. It adds a timbre and tone that, if anything, highlight the weight of what Scott Key witnessed and all the battles that have led us up to today. I immediately started thinking about how we look at things from a different perspective when we (or the things) are upside down and backwards. Ms. Betinis (who has a January birthday) has a catalog of beautiful music, including a song inspired by a poem by Victor Hugo (who has a February birthday).
And it was right around this time that I realized Victor Hugo had been following me around… for days!
He was in conversations about “the republic” and underscoring contemplation about right and wrong, morals versus ethics versus laws. And he was in a friend’s Twitter feed (which is totally random, ‘cause y’all know I’m not on Twitter). Then I started delving into the speeches he made to the French Constituent Assembly and, in particular, to the speech he made today in 1848 calling for the abolition of the death penalty.
“I regret that this question, perhaps the first of all, arrives in the midst of your deliberations almost out of the blue, and surprises unprepared speakers.
As for me, I will say few words, but they will start from the feeling of a deep and ancient conviction.”
“Well, think about it, what is the death penalty? The death penalty is the special and eternal sign of barbarism. (Movement.) Wherever the death penalty is lavished, barbarism dominates; wherever the death penalty is rare, civilization reigns. (Sensation.)
Gentlemen, these are indisputable facts. The softening of the penalty is a big and serious step forward. Part of its glory, the eighteenth century, abolished torture; the nineteenth century will abolish the death penalty. (Cheers! Yes! Yes! )”
— quoted from Victor Hugo’s address to the French Constituent (General) Assembly, September 15, 1848
And it got me thinking about Victor Hugo as an activist and as a writer of social commentary. It got me thinking about all the struggles, trials and tribulations, and suffering found in his fiction – but also how there is always, always love. Despite the most horrible of odds, there is love. And, finally, it got me thinking about how any one of us is responding/reacting to all the mayhem, civil disobedience, civil unrest, and isolation we are currently encountering — and how we might react differently if we were a character in a Victor Hugo novel…or poem. Or, for that matter, how we might react if we were Victor Hugo, himself. How we can we stay true to ourselves even when “the bough is slight” or we are on shaky ground?
“Be like the bird, who Pausing in his flight On limb too slight Feels it give way beneath him Yet sings Knowing he has wings.”
— “Be like the bird” poem by Victor Hugo
Keep in mind, that some of this will not be evident in the class. Keep in mind, also, that my hair is super curly and super thick. So, when I braid my hair, all I have to do to keep all these threads together is keep joining everything together until I reach the end. Violá! Yoga (Union).
You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.
“I feel in myself the future life. I am like a forest once cut down; the new shoots are stronger and livelier than ever. I am rising, I know, toward the sky. The sunshine is on my head. The earth gives me its generous sap, but heaven lights me with reflection of unknown worlds. You say the soul is nothing but the resultant of the bodily powers. Why, then, is my soul more luminous when my bodily powers begin to fail? Winter is on my head, but eternal spring is in my heart.”
— quoted from essay on Immortality by Victor Hugo (published in Sacramento Daily Union, March 16, 1882)
“The future belongs to hearts even more than it does to minds.”
— quoted from Les Misérables by Victor Hugo
2025: Some formatting revised.
### “To love another is to see the face of God.” (Les Mis, VH) ###
Everything gives rise to its opposite, therefore we work without conscious effort and teach without agenda.
We enjoy everything and possess nothing.
Our accomplishments do not emerge from our ego, so we do not cling to them.
Thus they benefit all beings.”
– (2) quoted from A Path and A Practice: Using Lao-tzu’s Tao Te Ching as a Guide to an Awakened Spiritual Life by William Martin
A few months back, I posted about chaos theory; and if you watch one of the pendulum models (see below it can seem like so much craziness. However, when faced with so much confusion, I have to remind myself of the following:
we’ve seen this pattern before;
it makes no sense if you get caught up in the momentum;
all the movement is, in fact, moving towards stillness;
and that, from the perspective of natural law, there is a moment when all of the movement is, in fact, “effortless effort.”
As someone with a type-A personality, I sometimes struggle with the idea of “effortless effort.” Don’t get me wrong; I can be still, I can relax. However, there are certain times where “doing nothing” feels like the wrong choice. I’ve been conditioned and socialized to believe this. Many in the Western world have been conditioned and socialized to believe this. But, not doing is still doing and “effortless effort” is not the same as doing nothing. In fact, sometimes, it takes a great deal of effort to let go.
In a 2009 blog post, Meditation Oasis (Mary and Richard Maddux) refers to a the Wikipedia description of “Wu Wei” – which literally means “not-doing doing” – as “’natural action’ giving the example of a tree growing. It is doing growing, and yet it is not doing.” This makes me think of Alan Watts meditation where he describes breathing as something that happens to us, but also something we can engage – and, once engaged, it is something we do deeply without effort. Meditation is like this. Life is like this too, and Taoist philosophy points to “Wu Wei” as a way to act and/or experience action in daily life. On Meditation Oasis’s blog, they describe meditation as “the art of allowing the mind to experience a natural state.” This too, is what Patanjali advocates in the Yoga Sūtras, “resting in your own true nature.” (YS 1.3)
“The most fluid and yielding substance will flow past the most rigid with the speed of a racehorse.
That which does not hold a particular form can enter even that which seems impenetrable.
This is why we practice “effortless effort.”
We act without ado.
We teach without arguments.
This is the way of true happiness, but because people prefer distractions and noise, it is not a popular way.”
– (43) quoted from A Path and A Practice: Using Lao-tzu’s Tao Te Ching as a Guide to an Awakened Spiritual Life by William Martin
In commentary on wu-wei, Dr. Martin says, “This phrase implies pure action in the present moment without any accompanying resistance, second-guessing, or worry. In the practice of wu-wei we just “do what we do.” The more awareness and acceptance we bring to the present moment, the more wu-wei is possible. This can take the form of either energetic activity or relaxed waiting. Like acceptance, wu-wei is not passive….” The sounds great, but I wonder how it works in situations where things are steadily spiraling out of control, where there is deadly chaos and we can’t seem to find the center point. I think of Dr. Martin Luther King paraphrasing the abolitionist minister Theodore Parker and am reminded that we have to bend the arc. But, how do we do that without more harm? How do we do that with ‘effortless effort?”
“I do not pretend to understand the moral universe. The arc is a long one. My eye reaches but little ways. I cannot calculate the curve and complete the figure by experience of sight. I can divine it by conscience. And from what I see I am sure it bends toward justice.”
– quoted from an 1853 sermon by Theodore Parker
Dr. William Martin wrote a book on the Tao and activism, which I have not read yet. However, Eastern philosophies like Taoism, Buddhism, and Yoga are philosophies that encourage experiencing the present moment – which requires stillness. So, today we are going to move into stillness.
Please join me today (Tuesday, September 1st) at 12 Noon or 7:15 PM for a virtual yoga practice on Zoom, where we will do what we do. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
Tuesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (Today’s playlist is dated March 29th or 03292020.)
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
– quoted from “The Man in the Arena” portion of the “Citizenship in a Republic” speech by former President Theodore Roosevelt (delivered April 23, 1910, Sorbonne, Paris)
It is not uncommon, when we turn inward, to find a head full of doubt; but, we also find a road of promise. We may find fear; but also strength, wisdom, and courage. Even when life is hard, strenuous, if we keep on pushing, we get a little bit stronger. There may be cracks, but that’s how the light gets in and…
OK, you get the picture. There’s a point where certain kinds of inspiration becomes a little syrupy, a little much, and even a little trite. This can especially be true when we are enduring a challenging time – or, as is the case now, challenging times. But, you know what never gets syrupy? You know what never gets trite? The story of someone who demonstrates that despite their hard times, they can still feel the spirit in their soul. The story of someone who is in a dark place, and yet still express gratitude for their unconquerable soul. The story of someone who may be far from home, with broken bones and a broken heart, a little rusty, but still runnin’.
We may not always want to hear one of those stories of people who are having the same hard time as us – or a significantly harder time than us – and still manages to find some joy in life, smile, and move forward. Sometimes we want to wallow in our muck, moan a few verses of “Oh, woe is me” and “Nobody Knows the Troubles I’ve Seen.” And we absolutely get to do that. Everybody gets to deal, cope, grieve, rail (or rage) against the machine in their own way and in their own time. But, let’s be honest, even that gets old and trite.
You know what never gets old? The stories of people who wrestle with the demons inside and outside, seen and unseen, and are still unbroken never gets old.
“I will now make a confession: It was the sight of your maimed strength and masterfulness that begot Long John Silver … the idea of the maimed man, ruling and dreaded by the sound, was entirely taken from you.”
– quoted from a letter to William Ernest Henley, written by Robert Louis Stevenson
Born today in 1849, in Gloucester, England, William Ernest Henley was a poet, a literary critic, an editor, and poet whose work and life has inspired billions of people around the world, including presidents and prime ministers, royalty, soldiers, athletes, captains of industries (and of starships), and other writers. Even though he wrote and published thousands of poems, he is remembered for one: an originally untitled work that we now call “Invictus.” It is a poem that in many ways encapsulates the old fashioned understanding of stoicism.
In modern times, we often think of someone who stuffs down their pain and pretends like it doesn’t exists. We might even associate the philosophy with having a “stiff upper lip” – which is the characteristic of someone who “grins and bears it” (but is in too much pain to actually grin). We might even think of someone who is stoic as someone who is unhappy. However, to the ancient stoics like Epictetus, Seneca, and the Emperor Marcus Aurelius stoicism was about finding happiness within a given fate, which meant accepting ones fate and figuring out how to move forward. And, William Ernest Henley was nothing if not stoic.
Henley wrote a whole slew of poems, including “Invictus,” which are referred to as his hospital poems (and one of his published collections is called In Hospital), because he spent a great deal of time in the hospital. From the age of 12, he suffered from a kind of tuberculosis that affected his bones and resulted in partial amputation of his left leg by the age of 20. His boisterous attitude, massive size, cleverness, and ability to laugh (loudly) – not to mention his one leg – inspired Robert Louis Stevenson to create the character Long John Silver in Treasure Island. (Although she died at a young age, Henley’s daughter Wendy shared some of her dad’s spirit and inspired one of the main characters of J. M. Barrie’s Peter Pan.)
Not long after the amputation of his left leg, doctors told Henley that they need to amputate his right leg. Henley fought against the idea, sought out other treatments, and eventually came under the care of the surgeon Joseph Lister, whose work with antiseptic surgery would save billions of lives (and inspire the creation of Listerine™). Dr. Lister, thorough a variety of treatments, was able to save Henley’s leg and enable Henley to live a relatively active life for almost thirty years. It was during one of those Lister-related hospital stays that Henley wrote “Invictus.”
“Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.”
– quoted from “The Sermon on the Mount,” The Gospel According to Matthew (7:14)
“It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.”
– quoted from “Invictus” by William Ernest Henley
Please join me for a “spirited” 65-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Sunday, August 23rd) at 2:30 PM. You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. PLEASE NOTE: Zoom 5.0 is in effect. If you have not upgraded, you will need to give yourself extra time to log into Zoom. You can always request an audio recording of this practice (or any practice) via email or a comment below.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (The playlists have slightly different before/after practice content.)
If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can call 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You can also call the TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.
“If we could raise one generation with unconditional love, there would be no Hitlers. We need to teach the next generation of children from Day One that they are responsible for their lives. Mankind’s greatest gift, also its greatest curse, is that we have free choice. We can make our choices built from love or from fear.”
– Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D.
“I cannot leave out the problem of life and death. Many young people and others have come out to serve others and to labor for peace, through their love for all who are suffering. They are always mindful of the fact that the most important question is the question of life and death, but often not realizing that life and death are but two faces of one reality. Once we realize that we will have the courage to encounter both of them….
Now I see that if one doesn’t know how to die, one can hardly know how to live—because death is a part of life.”
– quoted from The Miracle of Mindfulness: An Introduction to the Practice of Meditation by Thích Nhất Hạnh
Today’s post and class will be tricky for some. Today’s theme is always tricky for some. Although, I would assert that it shouldn’t be. After all, death is part of life. That can come off glib and easy to say – specifically because it is a little glib, or shallow, because it belies the fact that loss is hard and that most of us haven’t/don’t really face the concept of death until we (or someone we love) is dying. The statement “death is part of life” is also shallow because it belies the fact that, even if we meditate on and prepare for death, loss is still hard. Yes, death and dying are something that we all have to deal with, but to just leave it at that is what makes the subject tricky. We have to, as Thích Nhất Hạnh instructs in The Miracle of Mindfulness, go deeper.
“The five stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance – are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one[s] we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief. Not everyone goes through all of them or goes in a prescribed order.”
– quoted from On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Grief by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler
Born in Zürich, Switzerland today in 1926, Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was the oldest triplet in a family of Protestant Christians. Despite her father’s wishes, she grew up to be a psychiatrist known for her work on death and dying, life and death, and the five stages of grief. Her ultimate work was in part inspired by her work with refugees in Zürich during World War II. After the war, she participated in relief efforts in Poland and, at some point, visited the Maidanek concentration camp in Poland. As a young woman, standing in a place of destruction, she was struck by the compassion and human resilience that would inspire someone to carve hundreds of butterflies into the walls of the death camp.
Dr. Kübler-Ross originally planned on being a pediatrician. However, she married a fellow medical student (in New York in 1958) and became pregnant. The pregnancy resulted in the loss of her pediatrics residency, so she switched to psychiatry. Unfortunately, she also suffered two miscarriages before giving birth to two children. The loss of her residency and her miscarriages were not her first (or last) experiences with loss. Her marriage ended in divorce and, when she attempted to build a Virginia hospice for infants and children with HIV/AIDS, someone set fire to her home (in 1994). The house and all of the belongings inside were lost to arson.
When she started her psychiatry residency, Dr. Kübler-Ross was struck by the way hospitals in the United States treated patients who were dying. She began to host lectures where medical students were forced to meet and listen to dying people outside of a clinical setting. Her intention was to get medical students to “[react] like human beings instead of scientists…and be able to treat [terminal patients] with compassion the same compassion that you would want for yourself.” As she moved through her career, she continued hosting the series of seminars which used interviews with terminally ill patients. Her work was met with both praise and criticism – most of the latter was because she was so obviously questioning the traditional practices of psychiatry. In 1969, she released her seminal book On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families, which provided a grief model for people who were dying and for those they were leaving behind.
“Those who have the strength and the love to sit with a dying patient in the silence that goes beyond words will know that this moment is neither frightening nor painful, but a peaceful cessation of the functioning of the body.”
– quoted from On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Dr. Kübler-Ross explained from the beginning that her outline was not intended to be linear and yet, people wanted to be able to step through the stages with grace and ease. The problem with that mindset is… life is messy and so is grieving. A perfect example of the messiness of life and death can be found in Dr. Kübler-Ross’s own life… and death. In 1995, after a series of strokes which left her partially paralyzed on her left side, she found herself confronted with the reality of her own death. Added to her grief was the closing of Shanti Nilaya (“Final Home of Peace”), a healing and growth center which she had established in the later 1970’s (shortly before her divorce) after convincing her husband to buy 40-acres of land in Escondido, California.
Despite a 2002 interview with The Arizona Republic, where she stated that she was ready to die, Dr, Kübler-Ross struggled with the fact that she could not choose her own time of death. He son Ken, Founder and President of the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, served as her caregiver for the last decade of her life. In a 2019 interview with the hosts of ABC Radio’s Life Matters, Ken said, “A few weeks before she passed she said to me, ‘Kenneth, I don’t want to die.’”
“It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we’re alive – to release our inner selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade designed to conform to external definitions of who and what we are.”
– quoted from Death: The Final Stage of Growth by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Ken Ross admitted that he was taken aback by his mother’s statement that she did not want to die. It turned out, Dr. Kübler-Ross was not only physically paralyzed; she was also stuck in the anger stage of her own grief model. She caught flak in the media – as if she were somehow above being human simply because she had studied, taught, and spoken so openly and so frequently on the subject of death and dying. She did not stay there (in the anger stage), however, as her family and friends encouraged her to keep living and to keep processing the experience of dying. Her son even literally pushed her out of her comfort zone by assisting her in wheelchair marathons and in visiting her sisters in Europe.
“[She] let herself be loved and taken care of, then that was her final lesson — and then she was allowed to graduate. For years I thought about this and what I realized was that’s exactly what she teaches. [When] you learn your lessons you’re allowed to graduate.”
– Ken Ross in a 2019 “Life Matters” interview on ABC Radio National
“In Switzerland I was educated in line with the basic premise: work, work, work. You are only a valuable human being if you work. This is utterly wrong. Half working, half dancing – that is the right mixture. I myself have danced and played too little.”
– Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D. in an interview
Please join me today (Wednesday, July 8th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom, where there will be work, dance, and play. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube andSpotify.
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
“Strange though it may seem to you, one of the most productive avenues for growth is found through the study and experience of death. Perhaps death reminds us that our time is limited and that we’d better accomplish our purpose here on earth before our time runs out. Whatever the reason….Those who have been immersed in the tragedy of massive death during wartime, and who have faced it squarely, never allowing their senses and feelings to become numbed and indifferent, have emerged from their experiences with growth and humanness greater than that achieved through almost any other means.”
– quoted from Death: The Final Stage of Growth by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Revised 07/08/2023.
### “People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” EKR ###
– “Ignorance (or lack of knowledge), false sense of self, attachment (rooted in pleasure), aversion (which is attachment rooted in pain), and fear of death or loss are the afflicted thoughts.”
Yoga Sutra 2.17: draşțŗdŗśyayoh samyogo heyahetuh
– “The union of the seer and the seeable is the cause of pain (that may be avoidable).”
“The objective world (what is seen), consisted of a combination of elements and senses, and having a nature of illumination, activity, and stability, has two purposes: fulfillment and freedom.”
Prepare yourself for some information that may seem surprisingly harsh and brutal. (Fair warning, some of this may be difficult to read.)
Thursday (6/11) was the anniversary of formation of the Committee of Five. Consisting of John Adams (Massachusetts), Roger Sherman (Connecticut), Robert Livingston (New York), Benjamin Franklin (Pennsylvania), and Thomas Jefferson (Virginia), the committee was charged, back in 1776, with drafting a document which would be approved by the Second Continental Congress and presented to England as a Declaration of Independence. The committee worked from until July 5thand, contrary to what many believe, the approved document was signed over the next several months by the various delegates. There was no single day of signing. Both the fact that people believe there was a single day of signing, as well as the fact that the committee excluded their original language criticizing slavery, is a sign of ignorance. The fact that a declaration of independence stated “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness….” but did not consider that these truths applied to women and people of color is a sign of ignorance.
Yesterday (6/12) was the anniversary of the birth of a young girl. Born in Frankfurt, Germany in 1929, Anne Frank would die in the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp at the age of 14. Her death, as well as the deaths of her family, friends, community, and millions of others is a sign of ignorance.
“It’s difficult in times like these: ideals, dreams and cherished hopes rise within us, only to be crushed by grim reality. It’s a wonder I haven’t abandoned all my ideals, they seem so absurd and impractical. Yet I cling to them because I still believe, in spite of everything, that people are truly good at heart. I simply can’t build my hopes on a foundation of confusion, misery, and death. I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up at the sky, I somehow feel that this cruelty too shall end, and that peace & tranquility will return once again.”
— Anne Frank, written in her diary (“Kitty”) on July 15, 1944
Yesterday was also the anniversary of the assassination of Medgar Evers in 1963. Evers was an African American civil rights activist in Mississippi, who worked as the state’s field secretary for the NAACP, worked to overturn segregation, and worked to ensure voters’ rights. He was shot (in the back and clear through the heart) in his front yard by a member of the KKK and the White Citizens’ Council. The fact that Evers had to do the work he did, as well as the fact that he was killed for doing that work, is a sign of ignorance. The fact that two all-white juries failed to convict the person how killed Evers is a sign of ignorance. The fact Evers and his wife Myrlie Evers had to teach their young children (ages: 3, 7, and 9) how to tell the difference between firecrackers and gunshots, as well as how to hide when they heard gunshots, is a sign of ignorance. The fact that many people don’t know about the thousands who marched in protest after Medger Evers was killed is a sign of ignorance.
“Freedom has never been free… I love my children and I love my wife with all my heart. And I would die, die gladly, if that would make a better life for them.”
– Medger Evers, June 7, 1963 (just days before his death)
Yesterday was also the anniversary of the United States Supreme Court decision in Loving v. Virginia in 1967. The court declared any state laws prohibiting interracial marriage to be unconstitutional. The fact that states like Virginia had considered people like Richard Loving (a white man) and his wife Mildred Loving (a black and Indigenous American woman) to be criminals – even sentencing them to prison – is a sign of ignorance. The fact that they faced hate from people in their community is a sign of ignorance.
“I understand it and I believe it.”
– Mildred Loving (in 2003) when asked if she understood she was “putting her name behind the idea that two men or two women should have the right to marry each other”
Yesterday, in 2016, a man walked into the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, Florida, and started shooting. Pulse was a gay nightclub that often, as they were that night, held theme nights which attracted a wide variety of people. 49 people were killed and over 50 were wounded in what was the deadliest (single) incident of violence against GLBTQIA+ in the United States and the second deadliest terrorist attack on U. S. soil since 9/11. Until the Las Vegas shooting in October 2017, it was the deadliest single mass gunman shooting in U. S. history. The fact that the shooting happened, that people couldn’t just go out for an evening of dancing with family and friends, is a sign of ignorance. The fact that a little over a year later there would be another mass shooting, let alone the countless before and since, is a sign of ignorance.
“There is so much love out there. I want the legacy of these kids to be that. To show the world that [being LGBTQ] is more than a label – these are people that were loved, they were caring, they were human and these hate crimes are just totally uncalled for. Unnecessary. We are here because God created us and he created us all equal – and some people don’t seem to have this kind of vision. I don’t know what kind of world they want to live in.”
– Mayra Alvear, one year after her youngest daughter Amanda was killed in the Pulse Orlando shooting
Today is the 89th birthday of Dr. Irvin Yalom. Born today in 1931, he is Emeritus Professor of Psychiatry at Stanford and an author who pioneer of existentialist psychotherapy, who was featured in the 2003 documentary Flight from Death. His therapy and research are based on his belief that “we are here, through random events; that we are here alone…. that we are responsible for carving out own life pattern, our own meaning… we have no predestined fate…” Dr. Yalom outlines four givens: Isolation, Mortality, Meaninglessness, and Freedom (which comes with responsibility). He indicates that we are deal with inner conflict around the four givens and that our responses are either functional or dysfunctional.
“I am using the term [existential] in a very simple, straightforward way; simply to refer to existence. [As an adjective] Existential Psychotherapy means simply, a therapy focused on concerns emerging from the nature of existence.”
– Dr. Irvin Yalom, speaking at a 2009 Evolution of Psychotherapy Conference
– “The union (yoga), alliance, or relationship between our power to see (and what we see) is the way to experiencing our own true nature.”
Yoga Sutra 2.24: tasya heturavidyā
– “The cause of that [union, alliance, or relationship] is ignorance.”
In the philosophy of yoga, we might describe what Dr. Yalom calls as “functional or dysfunctional” as klişțāklişțāh (“afflicted and not afflicted”), and we can see the correlation between dysfunctional or afflicted thoughts and actions and suffering. As indicated in earlier sutras (see above), the first afflicted thought pattern is the bedrock for all the others: ignorance. Today’s sutra goes deeper into the nature of ignorance. Going deeper may help you answer the question, “How ignorant are you?”
Please join me a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, June 13th) at 12:00 PM. You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class.
Today’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (Links are available during the Zoom call and I have updated this post.)
“And so we have…this critical problem as human beings of seeing to it that the mythology—the constellation of sign signals, affect images, energy-releasing and -directing signs—that we are communicating to our young will deliver directive messages qualified to relate them richly and vitally to the environment that is to be theirs for life, and not to some period of man already past, some piously desiderated future, or—what is worst of all—some querulous, freakish sect or momentary fad. And I call this problem critical because, when it is badly resolved, the result for the miseducated individual is what is known, in mythological terms, as a Waste Land situation. The world does not talk to him; he does not talk to the world. When that is the case, there is a cut-off, the individual is thrown back on himself, and he is in prime shape for that psychotic break-away that will turn him into either an essential schizophrenic in a padded cell, or a paranoid screaming slogans at large, in a bughouse without walls.”
– from A Joseph Campbell Companion: Reflections on the Art of Living by Joseph Campbell
How do we keep from becoming, to paraphrase Joseph Campbell, a screaming paranoid person? How do we face trauma, loss, and disability with a smile on our face, as Wayman Tisdale did? Maybe we have to go all the way back to the womb to figure out why some people survive the challenging circumstances they face in life. Maybe we have to go back even farther than that to see why some people just inherently know how to stay connected to their “inside stuff” even when life throws them one curve ball after another fast ball. Whatever the reason some people rebound and some people don’t (or don’t as easily as others), trying to figure out that reason has fascinated people since the beginning of time.
Children’s book author and illustrator Maurice Sendak, born today in 1928, in Brooklyn, New York, once said, “I only have one subject. The question I am obsessed with is: How do children survive?” Like the poets mentioned during Sunday’s class (06/07/2020), Sendak wrote about what he saw – and what he saw was a family decimated by the Holocaust and trying to acclimate to a new country and a new culture. He saw kids being kids, being alive and full of so much life despite the overwhelming and pervasive feeling of perpetual mourning. The adults called the unruly children “vilde chaya,” which is Yiddish for “wild animal.” Sendak turned it into “wild things” and wrote a children’s book that become the center of a trilogy about (you guessed it) how children survive and thrive.
“I grew up in a house that was in a constant state of mourning.”
– Maurice Sendak in a 2002 interview with children’s book historian Leonard Marcus
“’And now,’ cried Max, ‘let the wild rumpus start!’”
– from Where The Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak
Where The Wild Things Are, published in 1963, tells the story of preschool-age Max who, as adults would have said during my childhood, gets a little too big for his britches. He is sent to his room without his dinner because he can’t behave and, as children do, he lets his imagination take over. His bedroom becomes a magical land full of wild animals, beasts, monsters….
My amazing friend Julie K just sent me a recent essay in The New Yorker about metaphorical monsters. I found it problematic because the identity of the monsters is too vague. Sendak, however, was always very clear; the monsters in his first book were the perpetually mourning and stern adults in his family. He just exaggerated them into something endearingly grotesque. As Max manages his emotions, becoming “king of all wild things” (a. k. a. the “most wild thing of all”), he finds his way back to the regular world. Managing one’s emotions, it turns out, is the secret to making one’s way back to the regular world.
“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again. You really don’t have a sacred space, a rescue land, until you find somewhere to be that’s not a wasteland, some field of action where there is a spring of ambrosia—a joy that comes from inside, not something external that puts joy into you—a place that lets you experience your own will and your own intention and your own wish so that, in small, the Kingdom is there. I think everybody, whether they know it or not, is in need of such a place.”
– from A Joseph Campbell Companion: Reflections on the Art of Living by Joseph Campbell
“There should be a place where only the things you want to happen, happen.”
– from Where The Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak
As I mentioned before, Where The Wild Things Are was the first of a three-part series to be published, but it is actually the centerpiece to the trilogy. In The Night Kitchen (published in 1970) follows toddler-age Mickey as he falls, naked, into the Night Kitchen, where he has to avoid getting baked into the cake batter and eaten up. Max, again, is preschool-age. Outside Over There (published in 1981) features pre-adolescent Ida, who shirks her responsibility and then has to face the consequences of making things right. It is interesting to note that while there is always a symbol of a mother and evidence of a mother’s love in all three books, Ida is the only real-live human girl featured prominently in the books and she is given (in the book) the mother’s role of caregiver – a role she initially fails to take seriously.
“When Papa was away at sea and Mama in the arbor, Ida played her wonder horn to rock the baby still – but never watched.”
– from Outside Over There by Maurice Sendak
Maurice Sendak’s trilogy is recognized as a series which traces the psychological development of children. Each protagonist has age appropriate responsibilities, feelings, thoughts, and emotions. Each protagonist also has to navigate and find balance between the (age appropriate) expectations of the simultaneously present yet absent parent(s) and their feelings, thoughts, and emotions. One of the emotions that figures prominently, especially in Where The Wild Things Are, is rage and one of the themes that figures prominently in the books is how to manage emotions like rage. Because, as I sated before, managing one’s emotions is the secret to making one’s way back to the regular world. It is the boon, as it were, of this particular hero’s journey/cycle.
“But it is more than mere survival that Sendak aspires to, for his children and for himself. He asks the question of resilience: How do children surmount and transform in order to prosper and create? It is tempting to imagine that Sendak conceives of the trajectory of his own life and art as a model for the way he has handled these questions in his works.”
– from a 2009 The Psychologist article by psychoanalyst Richard Gottlieb
When Where The Wild Things Are was turned into a movie, therapists like Richard Gottlieb offered their clinical take on the book and the movie. Psychoanalyst and attorney Stanton Peele noted in a 2009 article for Psychology Today that Dr. G. Alan Marlatt, a psychologist who focused on addiction, “specifically developed mindfulness as a relapse prevention technique, one that assists addicted people to combat cravings. In brief, a user may imagine the urge to use again as a physical challenge – like a wave – that he or she rides out.” Then, Peele called Sendak’s work “a model of mindfulness.” For his part, Gottlieb did not think it was an accident that Sendaks’ work was so psychologically applicable. In fact, he specifically highlights various “psychological proddings and teachings” which influenced Sendak’s life – including the fact that his partner (for over 50 years) was psychoanalyst Eugene Glenn – and shares bits of conversations with colleagues who also see the value in the book.
“I’m not the milk and the milk’s not me. I’m Mickey!”
– Mickey in In The Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
Call it a coincidence, a coinkydink, God winking, or serendipity, but it is interesting to note that Maurice Sendak, whose seminal book has been hailed and praised by addiction experts, was born on the anniversary of Dr. Bob Smith’s last drink, which is also the anniversary of Alcoholics Anonymous. Today in 1935, Bill Wilson and Smith’s wife Anne gave a severely hung-over Smith (a. k. a. “Dr. Bob”) a beer so that he would be “steady enough” to go into surgery. Hours beyond when the surgery should have ended, Smith announced that yes, the surgery was successful and that he had spent the remaining time reaching out to creditors and others he had hurt when he was drinking. Founded by Smith and Wilson, with support from Smith’s wife Anne, Alcoholics Anonymous is a 12-step rehabilitation program that has helped some people cope with alcoholism. It is also the model for other 12-step programs. While I have not counted the steps as they apply to Maurice Sendak’s work, there are very definite parallels in the way the main characters acknowledge their problems, turn inward, and offer restitution and express remorse. There are also, in the books and in recovery, humongous amounts of love and forgiveness (in particular, self-love and self-forgiveness).
“Quiet down there!”
– Mickey In The Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
“If Ida backwards in the rain would only turn around again and catch those goblins with a tune, she’d spoil their kidnap honeymoon!”
– Papa’s song in Outside Over There
Please join me today (Wednesday, June 10th) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a practice inspired by the inner workings of a child’s heart and mind.Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You will need to register for the 7:15 PM class if you have not already done so. Give yourself extra time to log in if you have not upgraded to Zoom 5.0. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below.
Since music soothes the wild beasts, the goblins, and the cooks, Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. (NOTE: YouTube is the original playlist and includes the video below.)
“’Speak to the entire community of Israel, saying, “On the tenth of this month, let each one take a lamb for each parental home, a lamb for each household. But if the household is too small for a lamb, then he and his neighbor who is nearest to his house shall take [one] according to the number of people, each one according to one’s ability to eat, shall you be counted for the lamb.”’”
– Shemot / Exodus 12:3-4
“’And this is how you shall eat it: your loins girded, your shoes on your feet, and your staff in your hand; and you shall eat it in haste it is a Passover sacrifice to the Lord.’”
– Shemot / Exodus 12:11
Every year, as we approach the end of Passover, I think about the first Passover Seder. What would that have been like? How would have felt to celebrate freedom? How would it have felt to give thanks to G-d for that freedom? Charlie Harary points out that while it is natural to think the first Passover Seder occurred a year after exodus, it actually happened the night before exodus. That’s right: G-d commanded the Jewish people to celebrate their freedom and give thanks for being delivered out of Egypt before they were even free – even before they knew their freedom was guaranteed.
Can you imagine doing that? Can you imagine how it would feel? Can you imagine the faith it would take to sit in the middle of your suffering, in the middle of your family and friends as they suffer, and give thanks for what’s to come?
There is a history of this kind of observation in the Hebrew Bible. Remember, in Exodus, Deuteronomy and Leviticus, the instructions for Sukkot are to celebrate what will be given – not what has been given. On a certain level, the High Holidays falls into this paradigm; as the 10 Days of Awe / 10 Days of Atonement are a period of reflection, but also a period of looking forward.
“If one thinks of onself as free, one is free, and if one thinks of oneself as bound, one is bound. Here this saying is true, ‘Thinking makes it so.’”
– Ashtavakra Gita 1:11
It seems completely backwards to the modern mind. Today we think we need to Have something, in order to Do something, in order to Be what or who we want to be. However, Harary, as well as Neale Donald Walsh in Conversations with God, point out that the Old Testament formula – the formula for success in the time of Moses – was very different. Instead of Have + Do = Be, Harary and Walsh say that the formula was Be + Do = Have. So, if we want to have certain experiences, certain relationships, and certain things in our lives, we have to conduct ourselves as the person that has the experiences, relationships, and things we want in our lives.
“This formula is infallible. There is no wish that has been fulfilled, nor any wish that has been denied, that does not adhere to the principle of the Creation Equation. Every time that you got what you wanted, your desire for it plus the energy you invested in achieving it were greater than the forces that resisted you having it. Each time they weren’t greater, you didn’t get what you wanted.”
– Rod Styker in The Four Desires: Creating a Life of Purpose, Happiness, Prosperity, and Freedom
Think about it for a moment. One of the things with which people struggle at times is what to Do in a situation. Other times, we don’t struggle. We know exactly what to do and everything falls into place. Successfully achieving our goals still takes effort, it still takes work. But, sometimes, we know exactly what steps to take. How do we know? Because we’re in the mindset of the person who is going to do the work, we take that first step.
In The Four Desires, Rod Stryker codifies a similar formula for success, which he calls “The Creation Equation:” Is + Iv > Ik = P. Here, the intensity (or energy) of desire (Is) combined with the intensity (or energy) put into achieving the goal (Iv), must be greater than the resistance to achieving the goal (Ik), in order for the goal to be achieved (P). It’s easy, straightforward, and makes perfect sense. The problem is that we don’t always realize how much resistance we have to overcome – or that a large bulk of resistance comes from not believing in our ability to achieve success; and/or, in others not believing that we can achieve our success. When we spend a lot of time focused on what we don’t have, we don’t do. When we wake up each morning knowing who we are (BE); we get to work, (DO)ing what we need; so that at the end of the day we HAVE what we need and want.
But, going back to that first Passover Seder for a moment, consider that there is also a contemplative history of imagining one’s self in a certain situation and considering how we would feel or act in that situation. In the Roman Catholic tradition, contemplation is imagining one’s self in the situations of the Gospels. This type of contemplation, along with discernment (noticing the interior movements of the heart), is a big piece of Saint Ignatius of Loyala’s “Spiritual Exercises.” Another example of contemplation in the Christian tradition is moving through the Stations of the Cross. In the 8-limbed philosophy of yoga, one of the niyamas (“internal observations”) is svādyāya (“self study” or “self reflection”). Svādyāya includes noticing how we physically, mentally, and emotionally react or respond to sacred text, music, or situations.
“The study of scripture is another way of putting the principle of self-study into practice…. Elaborating on the concept of svādyāya, Vyasa emphasizes that only those texts that embody indisputable knowledge showing us the path to ultimate freedom are an essential component of self-study. In other words, svādyāya entails the study of spiritual texts that are authentic, contain experiential knowledge, and are infused with the energy to guide us on the path of inner freedom.”
– commentary on Yoga Sutra 2:1 in The Practice of the Yoga Sutra: Sadhana Pada by Pandit Rajmani Tigunait
If you’re interested in practicing a little svādyāya, by “attending” the first Passover Seder, please join me for class today (Tuesday, April 14th) at 12 Noon or at 7:15 PM on Zoom. Some of the new Zoom security protocols are definitely kicking in; so, please use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems. Tuesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.
If you are following the Orthodox Christian calendar and would like a recording of last week’s classes, please comment or email me.
For more ways you can offer yourself “small gestures of care, affection and prayer,” please join me and a special guest for “Lung Health and How We Cope Right Now (viewing COVID-19 through Traditional Chinese Medicine and YIN Yoga),” a discussion on the importance of the lungs in our overall wellbeing as well as how to just friggin’ cope right now. The conversation will include a brief overview of Traditional Chinese Medicine and YIN Yoga, as well as a brief Q&A followed by a little YIN Yoga.
If you are struggling with your physical or mental health, if you’ve always been curious about “alternative” medicine, and/or if you are missing your yoga practice, this special one hour event is for you. Please join us on YouTube, Wednesday, April 15th, 3:00 PM to 4:00 PM,
Also, mark your calendar for April 25th – the beginning of Kiss My Asana!
Speaking of Kiss My Asana…
Founded by Matthew Sanford, Mind Body Solutions helps those who have experienced trauma, loss, and disability find new ways to live by integrating both mind and body. They provide classes, workshops, and outreach programs. They also train yoga teachers and offer highly specialized training for health care professionals. This year’s yogathon is only a week long. Seven days, at the end of the month, to do yoga, share yoga, and help others. By participating in the Kiss My Asana yogathon you join a global movement, but in a personal way. In other words, you practice yoga… for 7 days.
Can you imagine Kissing My Asana?
You don’t need to wait until the end of the month, however, to consider how you might participate. Start thinking now about how you can add 5 minutes of yoga (or meditation) to your day, how you can learn something new about your practice, or even how you would teach a pose to someone close to you – or even to one of your Master Teachers/Precious Jewels.
To give you some ideas, consider that in past years my KMA offerings have included donation-based classes and (sometimes) daily postings. Check out one of my previous offerings dated April 14th (or thereabouts):
“Thank you, God, Look how misery has ended for us. The rain has fallen, The corn has grown, All the children that were hungry are going to eat. Let’s dance the Congo, Let’s dance the Petro, God said in Heaven That misery has ended for us.”
– “Merci Bon Dieu” by Frantz Casseus, sung by Harry Belafonte
PLEASE NOTE: This post involves a theoretical discussion on non-COVID related death.”
“People ask me how I find hope. I answer that I don’t believe in hope, and I don’t believe in hopelessness. I believe in compassion and pragmatism, in doing what is right for its own sake. Hope can be lethal when you are fighting an autocracy because hope is inextricable from time. An enduring strategy of autocrats is to simply run out the clock.”
– from Hiding in Plain Sight by Sarah Kendzior
“As spring is nature’s season of hope, so Easter is the Church’s season of hope. Hope is an active virtue. It’s more than wishful thinking….. My hope in the Resurrection is not an idle hope like wishing for good weather but an active hope. It requires something on my part – work. Salvation is a gift from God for which I hope, but Saint Paul told the Philippians to ‘work out your salvation with fear and trembling’ (2:12). My hope in the resurrection and eternal life in heaven requires work on my part.”
– from A Year of Daily Offerings by Rev. James Kubicki
Serendipitously, I received two texts from the same Austin suburb last night. One was from a friend, sharing the quote above. The other was from my brother, asking why people were celebrating the same thing at different times. The quote sharpened my focus. The question brings me to you.
Even though he didn’t ask the question in an all encompassing way, I am going to answer his question here in a broader sense, and in a pretty basic way. On Sunday, April 12th, Western Christians are celebrating Easter, Orthodox Christians are celebrating Palm Sunday (the Sunday before Easter), the Jewish community is observing Passover and there are some people in the world celebrating both Easter (or Palm Sunday) and Passover. When you consider that this observations and celebrations are occurring all over the world – and keep in mind different time zone – it can get really confusing. Hence my brothers question.
As you remember, Passover is a commemoration of the Exodus story, which is the story of the Jewish people being freed from slavery in Egypt. The Jewish liturgical calendar is lunar-based and therefore Passover happens at a slightly different time each year on the Gregorian (i.e., secular) calendar. According to all four canonical Gospels of the New Testament, Jesus spent the last week of his life preparing for Passover (and what he knew was coming in terms of the Crucifixion and Resurrection). Three of the four indicate that what Christians (and artists) refer to as the “Last Supper” was actually a Passover Seder – so we are back to a lunar calendar, although it’s a different lunar calendar. Orthodox Christians operate under the old-school Julian calendar, so now we have a third timeline.
Just to add a little spice to the mix, consider that, dogmatically speaking, the concept of a Messiah originates within Judaism and includes specific qualifications for how the Messiah would be identified. According to the Christian paradigm, Jesus meets the qualifications. According to most Jews, he does not. Most modern Christians focus exclusively on the New Testament and observe holy times accordingly. Some Christians, however, also follow the observations commanded in Deuteronomy and Leviticus.
Got it? Be honest. If you need a scorecard, I’m happy to provide one – especially since I’m about to go down the (metaphorical) rabbit hole.
Whenever I think about Easter, the waiting that happens on the Saturday between Good Friday and Easter, and the moment when the rock is rolled away to reveal the empty tomb, I think of one thing: Wigner’s friend taking care of Schrödinger’s Cat.
For those of you not familiar with physicist Erwin Schrödinger’s thought experiment (or paradox), it goes like this. The (imaginary) cat is closed up in a box with an unstable radioactive element that has a 50-50 chance of killing the cat before the box is opened. According to quantum mechanics, there is a moment when the cat is simultaneously alive and dead. This is called superposition and it could be considered the scientific equivalent of non-duality. When the box is opened, revealing the state of the cat, the superposition collapses into a single reality. (There is also the possibility that opening the box changes the percentage, but that’s a whole different tunnel.)
Physicist Eugene Wigner took things a bit farther by adding a friend. According to the Wigner’s thought experiment, instead of doing the experiment, the scientist leaves it all in the hands of a friend and waits for a report. Now, there is the superposition inside of the box and there is a separate superposition inside the lab, which means the wave (or superposition) collapses into a single reality when the box is opened (creating reality as the friend knows it) and collapses again when the (imaginary) friend reports to the scientist (establishing the original scientist’s reality). Let’s not even get into what happens if the friend opens the box and leaves the lab without reporting back to the original scientist, but has a certain expectation – i.e., understanding of reality – about what the scientist will find in the lab. Through it all, the cat exists (and ceases to exist) within its own reality. It never experiences the superposition others experience. It just is.
That state of being, existing, takes us back to Passover, and eventually to the Resurrection of Jesus.
“’And know also, Arjuna, that as the Divinity in all creatures and all nature, I am birthless and deathless. And yet, from time to time I manifest Myself in worldly form and live what seems an earthly life. I may appear human but that is only my “mya” (power of illusion), because in truth I am beyond humankind; I just consort with nature, which is Mine.’”
– The Bhagavid Gita: A Walkthrough for Westerners (4:6), by Jack Hawley
“And He said, ‘For I will be with you, and this is the sign for you that it was I Who sent you. When you take the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.’”
– Shemot / Exodus 3:12
“God said to Moses, ‘Ehyeh asher ehyeh (I will be what I will be),’ and He said, ‘So shall you say to the children of Israel, “Ehyeh (I will be) has sent me to you.’””
– Shemot / Exodus 3:14
In the Exodus story, the Jewish people are slaves in Egypt and G-d commands Moses to go to Pharaoh and demand they be released. Moses takes his brother Aaron along and then, when their show of power doesn’t convince Pharaoh of the authority of G-d, everyone is subject to nine plagues: blood, frogs, lice, wild beasts in the streets, pestilence, boils, hail, locusts, and day(s) of darkness. Remember it’s not only Pharaoh and the Egyptians who suffer. The Jews, who are already suffering the hardship of slavery, also have to endure these additional hardships. On the evening of the tenth plague, the death of the first born male child, the Jewish families are told they are to smear lambs blood on their doors – so their households will be passed over. They are also commanded to celebrate and give thanks for their freedom – even though they are still slaves.
Yes, it is a little mind boggling, but what passes as the first Passover Seder happens in Egypt and during a time of slavery. Considering Pharaoh had changed his mind before, they had no way of knowing (with any certainty) that they would be freed immediately after the tenth plague. See where this is going? In that moment, the Jewish people are simultaneously free and not free.
Furthermore, Rabbi David Fohrman, quoting Shlomo Yitzchaki, the medieval French rabbi known as Rashi, points out that when G-d initial speaks to Moses and Moses asks for G-d’s identity, Moses is told three times that the One who speaks is the One who will be with Moses and the Jewish people always. Regardless of what they are experiencing, Rashi explains, G-d will be with them. This is the very definition of compassion, which literally means “to suffer with.”
“’Whenever goodness and “dharma” (right action) weaken and evil grows stronger, I make Myself a body. I do this to uplift and transform society, reestablish the balance of goodness over wickedness, explain the sublime plan and purpose of life, and serve as the model for others to follow. I come age after age in times of spiritual and moral crisis for this purpose.’”
– The Bhagavid Gita: A Walkthrough for Westerners (4:7-8), by Jack Hawley
Jesus (during his time), and future Christians, are kind of in the same boat. In the last week of his life, he is betrayed, crucified, dead, buried, and resurrected – and he simultaneously is not. However, most of that is semantics. What is critical is the dead/buried, and resurrected part. In those moments, even right after the tomb is opened and there is some confusion about what has happened, Jesus is essentially Schrödinger’s Cat – and Christians, as well as non-believers, are either the original scientist or the friend.
Yet, when everything is said and done (stay with me here), this is all head stuff. What people are observing, commemorating, and/or celebrating right now, isn’t really about the head. Faith never is. It’s all about the heart. It’s all about love. Specifically, in these examples, it all comes back to G-d’s love expressed as compassion.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
– John 3:16 (NIV)
“’Strange? Yes. It is difficult for most people to comprehend that the Supreme Divinity is actually moving about in human form. But for those few who dare to learn the secret that is I, Divinity, who is the Operator within them, their own Self, My coming in human form is a rare opportunity to free themselves from the erroneous belief that they are their bodies.’”
– The Bhagavid Gita: A Walkthrough for Westerners (4:9), by Jack Hawley
Please join me today (April 12th)for my first every Easter Sunday service/practice, 2:30 PM – 3:35 PM, on Zoom. Some of the new security protocols are definitely kicking in so, please use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems. The playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify.
If you are following the Orthodox Christian calendar and would like a recording of last week’s classes, please comment or email me.
For more ways you can practice pragmatism and self-compassion, please join me and a special guest for “Lung Health and How We Cope Right Now ((viewing COVID-19 through Traditional Chinese Medicine and YIN Yoga),” a discussion on the importance of the lungs in our overall wellbeing as well as how to just friggin’ cope right now. The conversation will include a brief overview of Traditional Chinese Medicine and YIN Yoga, as well as a brief Q&A followed by a little YIN Yoga.
If you are struggling with your physical or mental health, if you’ve always been curious about “alternative” medicine, and/or if you are missing your yoga practice, this special one hour event is for you. Please join us on YouTube, Wednesday, April 15th, 3:00 PM to 4:00 PM,
Also, mark your calendar for April 25th – the beginning of Kiss My Asana!
Speaking of Kiss My Asana…
Founded by Matthew Sanford, Mind Body Solutions helps those who have experienced trauma, loss, and disability find new ways to live by integrating both mind and body. They provide classes, workshops, and outreach programs. They also train yoga teachers and offer highly specialized training for health care professionals. This year’s yogathon is only a week long. Seven days, at the end of the month, to do yoga, share yoga, and help others. By participating in the Kiss My Asana yogathon you join a global movement, but in a personal way. In other words, you practice yoga… for 7 days.
Kissing My Asana is pragmatic and compassionate!
You don’t need to wait until the end of the month, however, to consider how you might participate. Start thinking now about how you can add 5 minutes of yoga (or meditation) to your day, how you can learn something new about your practice, or even how you would teach a pose to someone close to you – or even to one of your Master Teachers/Precious Jewels.
To give you some ideas, consider that in past years my KMA offerings have included donation-based classes and (sometimes) daily postings. Check out one of my previous offerings dated April 12th (or thereabouts):
PATI [Latin, “suffer” > Late Latin, passio > Old French …> Middle English, PASSION]
PATI [Latin, “suffer”> Latin, patientia, “suffering”> Old French…> Middle English, PATIENCE]
– Etymology (the origin and meaning history) of the words “passion” and “patience”
Ask almost anyone, their family, and their friends if the original person is patient and you will often receive very divergent answers. There are people who cultivate patience, people who practice patience, and people who seem naturally patient. Then there’s everyone else. Or so it seems. The truth, when it comes to patience can be a little more nuanced than a single answer. It turns out we have different definitions / understandings of patience. Furthermore, our ability to be patient has as much (maybe more) to do with our situation (not to mention our neurobiology and perspective) than with our personality or habits.
Serotonin is a naturally produced chemical in the brain that sustains healthy brain and nerve function. Although it is a neurotransmitter, which helps relay signals in the brain, 90% of a person’s serotonin supply is found in the digestive track and in blood platelets. Too much or too little can affect our brain function (especially memory and learning), our overall mood, sexual desire and function, appetite, sleep, temperature regulation, and (on a certain level) engagement with the world. Too much or too little serotonin can adversely affect our cardiovascular system, muscles, endocrine system, and digestive system.
Studies indicate that next time you’re “hangry,” instead of blaming the person (or situation) pushing your buttons, you could blame your serotonin levels. You could also, however, consider your expectations.
In a 2018 Psychology Today article, Christopher Bergland described McDonald’s struggling with the “patience effect” when drive-thru customers didn’t realize their longer wait time was resulting in a higher quality burger. He also pointed out how Heinz struggled with people being irritated by how long it took ketchup to come out of an old-fashioned glass bottle back in the 70’s. Neither company changed their process. Instead, both companies overcame their issues with ad campaigns that changed customers’ expectations and, in the process, customers’ patience.
“Mice in a lab aren’t much different than humans waiting at the drive-thru or for ketchup to dispense from an old glass bottle. In a recent experiment, researchers pinpointed the role that serotonin plays in “the patience effect” depending on the confidence a mouse has that it’s worth waiting a few extra seconds for a delayed food reward…. the researchers found that stimulating serotonin production made the mice willing to wait for a food reward if they knew there was at least a 75% chance of being fed after waiting a maximum of 10 seconds. When the odds of receiving the food reward slipped below this threshold, serotonin failed to increase patience. ‘The patience effect only works when the mouse thinks there is a high probability of reward,’ [ Dr. Katsuhiko] Miyazaki said in a statement.
The main takeaway from this research is that the link between serotonin levels and subsequent behavior appears to be highly dependent on a mouse’s subjective confidence in an expected outcome.”
– Christopher Bergland, a world-class endurance athlete, coach, author, and political activist
Much of what’s happening in the world right now results in experiences that feel like our serotonin levels are out of whack. And that’s not a coincidence – especially when you consider the role emotional and social support play in maintaining healthy serotonin levels. To add insult to injury, unlike the people in the drive-thru, the people with the old-fashioned ketchup bottle, or the mice, we have no real expectations of when our patience will be rewarded. So, frustration – and suffering – increases.
Once again, we are caught in a feedback loop; because, studies show negative thought patterns, hostility, and irritability result in decreased health (including serotonin levels), which in turn causes us to experience an increase in negative thoughts, hostility, and irritability. There is hope, however.
Dr. Simon N Young, in 2007 Journal of Psychiatry and Neuroscience article reviewing neuroscience research, pointed out “alterations in thought, either self-induced or due to psychotherapy, can alter brain metabolism” and hypothesized that it could also increase serotonin levels, He also highlighted the fact that exposure to sunlight (even on a cloudy day) and bright lights can increase serotonin levels. Finally, he pointed to a third and fourth “strategy” for increasing serotonin levels: exercise and diet.
Four ways, right here, that you can do today!
cultivate positive thoughts (maybe through meditation, hint, hint);
step into the bright lights, baby;
exercise (yoga, anyone?);
and be mindful of what you eat.
If you’re available, please join me today (Saturday, April 11th), Noon – 1:30 PM for a live yoga practice on Zoom. The “04112020 LSPW” playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. My only request is that you let go of some expectations.
If you are following the Orthodox Christian calendar and would like a recording of last week’s classes, please comment or email me.
Meanwhile, regular loving-kindness meditation can improve your mood (hint, hint below). This type of Metta Meditation was part of my daily commute prior to the pandemic. Part I gives you a little background and a partially guided meditation. Part II (coming soon) includes guided meditation for the cardinal and intercardinal directions. These meditations were recorded in the Spring of 2019.
Also, mark your calendar for April 25th – the beginning of Kiss My Asana – and a special YIN Yoga event this Wednesday, April 15th, at 3:00 PM
Speaking of Kiss My Asana…
Founded by Matthew Sanford, Mind Body Solutions helps those who have experienced trauma, loss, and disability find new ways to live by integrating both mind and body. They provide classes, workshops, and outreach programs. They also train yoga teachers and offer highly specialized training for health care professionals. This year’s yogathon is only a week long. Seven days, at the end of the month, to do yoga, share yoga, and help others. By participating in the Kiss My Asana yogathon you join a global movement, but in a personal way. In other words, you practice yoga… for 7 days.
Pucker Up and Kiss My Asana!
You don’t need to wait until the end of the month, however, to consider how you might participate. Start thinking now about how you can add 5 minutes of yoga (or meditation) to your day, how you can learn something new about your practice, or even how you would teach a pose to someone close to you – or even to one of your Master Teachers/Precious Jewels.
To give you some ideas, consider that in past years my KMA offerings have included donation-based classes and (sometimes) daily postings. “Flashback” to one of my previous offerings dated April 11th (or thereabouts):
A Joyful Practice 