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FTWMI: “A Christmas Prelude” December 23, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Bhakti, Christmas, Faith, Healing Stories, Hope, Music, One Hoop, Peace, Poetry, Religion, Wisdom, Writing, Yoga.
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Peace and good will!” to all. “Happy Holidays!” and “Merry Christmas!” to all who are celebrating.

For Those Who Missed It: The following was originally posted on December 23, 2020 and reposted in 2021. Dates have been adjusted accordingly.

“Why me, I’m just a simple man of trade
Why Him with all the rulers in the world
Why here inside this stable filled with hay
Why her, she’s just an ordinary girl
Now I’m not one to second guess
What angels have to say
But this is such a strange way to save the
World”

— quoted from the song “What a Strange Way to Save the World” by 4Him

Almost everyone has a favorite Christmas carol — even if they don’t celebrate Christmas! And the carols not only tell the story of Christmas, they are a great way to tell the story. For a little over a decade, I have used a variation of today’s playlist to do just that: tell the story of Christmas. Sometimes, Christmastide overlaps Chanukah and the playlist expands accordingly. It’s not that hard, really. After all, they are both celebrations of light that focus us on the 25th.

This year’s variation, as it appears on YouTube and Spotify, is a little different. There’s no Garth, but my favorite Garth “carol” does appear in a surprisingly endearing format — and delivered by someone dearly loved. Both formats include an a cappella version of “The Little Drummer Boy” (which holds a special place in my heart), but they are different versions. Another variation on a theme: the two different versions of “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing!” The one on YouTube includes an introduction to a live performance by a choir in London (and concludes with a prayer). The one on Spotify is the one people usually hear in my classes just before we start the practice.

Which brings me to another change: the beginning of the playlist. Just as so many set the tone this time of year by playing holiday music, I usually have two or three tracks at the beginning of the playlist that are not actually intended for the practice. They are simply to establish a feeling of reverence and celebration consistent with the time. The version of “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing!” (by Carola) that I typically use is amazing and makes every space feel a little like a cathedral. But, since there is no way to really time things out the way I normally would, you can enjoy the music after the practice.

“Mary nodded
Pa rum pum pum pum
The ox and lamb kept time
Pa rum pum pum pum

I played my drum for him
Pa rum pum pum pum
I played my best for him
Pa rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum,
Rum pum pum pum

Then he smiled at me
Pa rum pum pum pum
Me and my drum”

— quoted from the song “The Little Drummer Boy”

Please join me today (Saturday, December 23rd) at 12:00 PM, for a 90-minute yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “12232020 A Christmas Prelude”]

CHECK OUT THE CALENDAR! I am teaching tomorrow AND you can kick off New Year’s Day 2024 in two ways (and in two spaces): with the very active practice of 108 Sun Salutations at 10:00 AM or with the very “chill” practice of a Yin+Meditation practice beginning at 5:00 PM. All times are Central Standard. Register to practice in-person (or join us via Zoom). Details are posted on the “Class Schedules” calendar.

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### “AND HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY LITTLE CHRISTMAS, NOW” ###

Time to Gear Up (a quick announcement about the new year)! December 11, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in 108 Sun Salutations, 7-Day Challenge, Fitness, Health, Hope, Meditation, Minneapolis, Minnesota, New Year, One Hoop, Surya Namaskar, Twin Cities, Yin Yoga, Yoga.
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Happy, Peaceful, Joyful Holidays, to all! 

It’s been a while; but, do you remember all the gear I put on to deal with winter in Minnesota? Well…

20191231_132543

It’s Time to Gear Up for a New Year!

For a limited time only, I will be back in the Twin Cities. In-person practices (also available on Zoom) will be held at various locations Monday, January 1st until Sunday, January 7th — with an additional practice held only on Zoom on Wednesday, January 10th. Spaces are limited for the in-person practices!

Click here for more details and to reserve your spots now. Let’s start the 2024 together!

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### Let’s Go! ###

EXCERPT (with links): “More Sitting and Breathing” November 18, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Healing Stories, Hope, Life, One Hoop, Philosophy, Wisdom, Yoga.
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Peace and blessings to everyone, everywhere.

“Yoga is awareness, a type of knowing. Yoga will end in awareness. Yoga is arresting the fluctuations of the mind as said in the Yoga Sutras (of Patanjali): citta vritti nirodha. When the mind is without any movement, maybe for a quarter of an hour, or even a quarter of a minute, you will realize that yoga is of the nature of infinite awareness, infinite knowing. There is no other object there.”

— Sri T. Krishnamacharya at 100, in an interview with A. G. Mohan

The following was originally posted in 2020:

“The perception and reality of who practiced the physical elements of Yoga changed in part because of a teacher named Sri Yogeshwara Ramamohana Brahmachari. Sri Brahmachari was married and had three children, but he taught in a remote cave at the base of Mount Kailash, a mountain sacred in Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Bön (a major Tibetan religion). His students would spend years studying with him and, as was the tradition, repay him with a gurudakshinā at the end of their studies. This traditional form of payment could be a monetary donation or the fulfillment of task(s). In the case of one student, Tirumalai Krishnamacharya, the repayment for seven and a half years of intensive instruction was three-fold: look for a lost sacred text written on palm leaves; get married and have a family; teach yoga.

Born today in 1888, Sri T. Krishnamacharya not only found, translated, and transcribed the lost Yoga Korunta, which is believed to be the basis of Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga, he also married, raised children, and spent most of his adult life teaching some of the most influential yoga teachers in history.”

Click here to read the entire post about the man remembered as the ‘Father of Modern Yoga.’

“Maybe this situation has happened for a reason. A reason that will unfold later.”

— Namagiriamma, Sr. Krishnamacharya’s wife

Please join me today (Saturday, November 18th) at 12:00 PM, for a 90-minute yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

Saturday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “07112020 An Introduction”]

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### Honor the grace of your Self. ###

UPDATED 2023: I Moustache You An Important Question November 3, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Changing Perspectives, Depression, Fitness, Food, Healing Stories, Health, Karma Yoga, Life, Men, Science, Wisdom, Yoga.
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May you be peaceful and happy / May you be healthy and strong!

“‘As long as records have been kept in all countries, women have lived longer than men,’ said Amelia Karraker, a program official at the National Institute on Aging. ‘Across, basically, almost every major cause of death, men are more likely to die than women are.’”

— quoted from the March 2023 CNBC Health and Science article entitled, “Here’s why American men die younger than women on average and how to fix it” by Charlotte Morabito

The following was originally posted in 2020. The post has been revised, with some statistics updated (or added) to reflect more recent data. NOTE: Some links will direct you away from this site. WARNING: This post discusses physical and mental health issues.

Today is a big day. Not just in the United States, but all over the world, today is a day for changing and also for gaining insight. Today is Movember 3rd — also known as the 3rd day of No(shave)mber, a month dedicated to “changing the face of men’s health.” This month of awareness started in Melbourne, Australia in 2004, but has its origins in a 1999 story about a group in Adelaide, South Australia that coined the word “Movember.” The Adelaide group, of about 80, spent the month “growing whiskers for whiskers” (possibly while drinking whiskey, since they started in a pub) while also raising money for the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA) by selling Movember t-shirts.

When Adam Garone, Travis Garone, Luke Slattery, and Justin (JC) Coughlin started the Melbourne group — of 30 “Mo bros” raising awareness for prostate cancer and men’s mental health (specifically depression) — they didn’t realize that they were starting a movement. In 2005, almost 500 people joined the original 30 and raised over $40,000 for the Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia, the PCFA’s largest donation at the time. Today, the Movember Foundation is an official charity in Australia and the movement has spread all over the world. Furthermore, the movement now includes “Mo sistahs” and other “Mo folks” and the focus has shifted to all aspects of men’s health and the discrepancies between men’s health and women’s health.

“Globally, men die an average of six years earlier than women, and for reasons that are largely preventable. Which means that it doesn’t have to be that way: we can take action to live healthier, happier and longer lives.”

“Mo your own way….”

— quoted from the (US) Movember website

Statistics (for 2019) showed that the average life expectancy for men was 76.3 years, versus 81.4 years for women. Estimates related to COVID-19 indicated that men would lose an average of 2.8 years versus 2.1 years lost by women. In any given year, 1 in 2 men will be diagnosed with cancer (versus 1 in 3 women) and studies show that a third of all cancers are preventable through diet, exercise, and other lifestyle choices. Those same lifestyle choices also benefit everyone’s cardiovascular systems, digestive systems, and mental health. 

Despite all the statistics and research about lifestyle choices, a large percentage of men are overweight (with 42.4% of Americans, in general, dealing with obesity and 9.2% with severe obesity). Note, however, that the term “obese” is tricky, especially in the United States, because our metrics can diagnose a very fit and muscular person as “obese.” Consider this then: 13.6% of men over the age of 18 consider themselves in fair to poor health — and many suffer from diabetes and heart disease without even knowing it.

Skin cancer is on the rise for all genders and is the most common cancer diagnosis for men, followed by prostate cancer. While melanoma is treatable and recoverable, the 2023 mortality rate for men is over twice that of women. 

In 2020, over 1.4 million men (globally) were diagnosed with prostate cancer — which is treatable and recoverable — while testicular cancer (which is also treatable and recoverable) is the most common cancer in men between the ages of 15 and 35. There’s over 70,000 new cases of testicular cancer every year (74,500 in 2020), with a little over half a million men (worldwide) living with (or beyond) it. The risk of both prostate cancer and testicular cancer increase if someone has a brother or father who has had that particular cancer; if a person has African-American ancestry; and (in the case of testicular cancer) if they have previously had that type of cancer. To make matters worse, men can also get breast cancer — which also has a genetic component.

All of the physical aspects of poor health take a mental health toll in a typical year. Keep in mind, however that 2020 was anything but typical (and the same can be said for 2021 – 2023) — especially when it comes to mental health. Then consider that, at the beginning of 2020, about 51.5 million Americans adults reported experiencing mental health issues within the previous 12 months and that that was an increase from previous years. In previous years, 15 million Americans (in general) were specifically diagnosed with depression. In 2018, an estimated 11.4 million people attempted suicide — with 48,344 Americans reported as dying from suicide. However, men die by suicide almost 4 times more than in women, and the highest rate of suicide is in middle-aged white men (who accounted for 69.67% of the suicides indicated above). In 2021, the number of deaths went down, but the percentage of middle-aged white men in that count was slightly higher. Additionally, veterans are at a high risk for suicide, regardless of gender.

And, let’s talk about the elephant in the room: gender. One set of stats that is only recently being tracked is the physical and mental health of transgender people. Just as diet and exercise affect physical and mental, so too does everyone’s level of hormones — which means hormone treatments could increase or decrease risk of certain illnesses. Additionally, physical and mental health improves when people have emotional support on their life’s journey. In my opinion, the high rate of suicide within the transgender community — as well as the high rate of violence against transgender people — indicates a lack of support and awareness. Thankfully, this is changing; however, as our perceptions change we need to make sure we do not leave transgender (or even non-binary) people out of the conversation.

  1. Spend time with people who make you feel good.

  2. Talk, more.

  3. Know the numbers. (If you are male and over 45, ask your doctor if you need a PSA test.)

  4. Know thy nuts. Simple.

  5. Move, more.”

— quoted from the (US) Movember website

According to the (US) Movember website, “70% of men say their friends can rely on them for support, but only 48% say that they rely on their friends.” This is always a wild (and frankly ridiculous) staticstic to me — but it points directly to the stigma and social mores or norms that make it challenging to be a healthy man in today’s society. Don’t get me wrong, as Dr. M. Scott Peck pointed out, “Life is difficult” for everyone. The individual aspects of each person’s life come with distinct physical and mental health risks. However, life is easier and people are healthier when we pay attention to what we’re feeling and also share what we’re feeling with people who respect us and treat us well. If you can’t count five people (or even three people) with whom you can have a mutually beneficial conversation — and between those five or three conversations cover every subject under the sun — you might want to consider how that lack of support translates into your quality of life and general well-being.

  1. Get your annual physical.

  2. Don’t smoke.

  3. Stay active.

  4. Eat heart healthy foods.

  5. Manage your stress.

  6. Drink in moderation.

  7. Know your family history.”

— Tips printed in Men’s Health

This is a supplemental posted related to the First Friday Night Special (as well as to some upcoming practices). Click here for details about the Movember 3rd practice in 2023.

If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can dial 988 (in the US) or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call this TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.

White Flag is a new app, which I have not yet researched, but which may be helpful if you need peer-to-peer (non-professional) support.

If you are a young person in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgement-free place to talk, you can also click here to contact the TrevorLifeline (which is staffed 24/7 with trained counselors).

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### MO BREATH, MO BETTA ###

… Generally Come Together (mostly the music) October 8, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Books, Changing Perspectives, Faith, Healing Stories, Hope, Life, Music, One Hoop, Pain, Peace, Philosophy, Religion, Shemini Atzeret / Simchat Torah, Suffering, Tragedy, Wisdom, Yoga.
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“Chag sameach!” to those who are able to celebrate Shmini Atzeret & Simchat Torah. Peace and blessings to everyone!!

“When we spoke about attempts to give a man in camp mental courage, we said that he had to be shown something to look forward to in the future. He had to be reminded that life still waited for him, that a human being waited for his return.”

— quoted from “Part One: Experiences in a Concentration Camp” in Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl

Please join me for a 65-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Sunday, October 8th) at 2:30 PM. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

Sunday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “06162020 Abe’s House & Soweto”]

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### Peace in / Peace out ###

Picking Up the Fire Thread (mostly a note, excerpt, and links) August 22, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Art, Books, Buddhism, Changing Perspectives, Healing Stories, Life, Music, Mysticism, One Hoop, Philosophy, Suffering, Wisdom, Writing, Yoga.
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Stay safe. Stay hydrated. Notice the path.

”Yet the little boy did grow up and it is the grown-up little boy who is writing now. And something of what he was by nature and something of what he became as a result of his experience will colour his words.”

– quoted from the “Introduction” in The Enchanted Places by Christopher Milne

Yesterday was the anniversary of the birth of Christopher Robin Milne (b. 8/22/1920), whose book The Enchanted Places bridged the gap between what people know – or think they know – about a boy and his toys and the man that grew up. That bridge is full of “a few precious things / [that] Seem to follow throughout all our lives.” Some of those things are specific, tangible and describable: toys, games, people. Some of those things are unspecific: a feeling created and then remembered. The bridge is also made up of barely describable and absolutely indescribable things.

As Patanjali pointed out in Yoga Sūtras 2.18 – 2.20), everything in the world is made up of these things. So, there is always a bridge and every one of us has a story (or stories) that make up our bridge. Or, we can think of the space between our “yesterdays” and today as a thread. Either way, when we pick up that thread today, we find an author born the day after Mr. Milne and another born fifteen years after that.

“I knew something important had happened to me that day because of Mr. Electrico. I felt changed. He gave me importance, immortality, a mystical gift. My life was turned around completely. It makes me cold all over to think about it, but I went home and within days I started to write. I’ve never stopped.

Seventy-seven years ago, and I’ve remembered it perfectly. I went back and saw him that night. He sat in the chair with his sword, they pulled the switch, and his hair stood up. He reached out with his sword and touched everyone in the front row, boys and girls, men and women, with the electricity that sizzled from the sword. When he came to me, he touched me on the brow, and on the nose, and on the chin, and he said to me, in a whisper, ‘Live forever.’ And I decided to.”

– Ray Bradbury (b. 8/22/1920)

The following excerpt is from a 2020 post:

“Every writer’s work is directly or indirectly the result of everything they’ve experienced, done, seen, thought, and heard. Just like each point in our lives is the direct and indirect experience of everything we’ve experienced, done, seen, thought, and heard. Writing is, after all, just a reflection of life. Sometimes, though, it’s hard to distinguish the seams or pull apart the threads that make up the tapestry. But then you read work by writers like Ray Bradbury and Annie Proulx and it’s as if every word and every page is an instruction manual in how things are put together and how things come apart. It’s as if they are saying, ‘Here, here, pull here.’

Both born today, Bradbury (in 1920) and Proulx (in 1935) were and are writers whose works leave impressions, while simultaneously pointing out the impressions that are being left by the lives we lead. Their works, like Bradbury’s Farenheit 451 and “The Sound of Thunder” and Proulx’s The Shipping News and ‘Brokeback Mountain” illustrate the cause and effect continuum that in yoga philosophy is referred to as karma (act, word, and deed – as well as the result or effect of effort) and samskāra (the mental and energetic impression left by the act, word, and deed). In life, while we are living it, we don’t always see where things begin and end. Reading brings our awareness to the edges, the extremes of the continuum – as does a meditation practice.”

Click here to read the entire 2020 post.

“Almost every book I’ve ever read has left its mark.”

– Annie Proulx (b. 8/22/1935)

Please join me today (Tuesday, August 22nd) at 12:00 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom. You can use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

Tuesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “08222021 Fire Thread”]

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### SECOND STEP: NOTICE WHAT YOU NOTICE. ###

FTWMI: The Powerful Possibilities That Come From “A Brother’s Love” August 2, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in "Impossible" People, Art, Books, Changing Perspectives, Confessions, Healing Stories, Hope, James Baldwin, Life, Love, Maya Angelou, Men, Music, Pain, Science, Suffering, Super Heroes, Tragedy, Wisdom, Writing, Yoga.
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Wherever you are, wherever you roam, stay hydrated and open to possibilities!

FTWMI: The following was originally posted in 2022. Links and class details have been updated. A practice note related to 2020 and 2021 has been deleted from this version. This is part 2 in my “impossible people” series.

“This also, then, leads on to the idea of whether or not the brain ever does big jumps – or does it only ever do small steps? And the answer is that the brain only ever does small steps. I can only get from here to the other side of the room by passing through the space in between. I can’t teleport myself to the other side. Right? Similarly, your brain can only ever make small steps in its ideas. So, whenever you’re in a moment, it can only actually shift itself to the next most likely possible. And the next and most likely possible is determined by its assumptions. We call it ‘the space of possibility.’ Right. You can’t do just anything. Some things are just impossible for you in terms of your perception or in terms of your conception of the world. What’s possible is based on your history.”

– quoted from the 2017 Big Think video entitled, “The Neuroscience of Creativity, Perception, and Confirmation Bias by Beau Lotto

My idea to spend part of August focusing on “impossible people” – and by that I mean people who do things others believe to be impossible – started long before I had ever heard of neuroscientist Beau Lotto or his work with the Lab of Misfits. In some ways it started with an awareness of certain people’s lives and accomplishments and a curiosity about how they got from A (“impossible”) to Z (“possible”). I mean, on some level I knew about “the space of possibility” and I definitely understood the theory that we live in the past. It is, after all, the science of samskāras (“mental impressions”) and vasanas (the “dwelling places” of habits). I also understood the power of imagination and visualization; often referenced the idea that an epiphany (“striking appearance” or “manifestation”) happens because the mind-intellect is prepared for the revelation; and frequently highlighted how we can be like Emily Dickinson and “dwell in Possibility.”

All of that is backed up by Western science and the Yoga Philosophy. As Dr. Lotto pointed out in his book Deviate: The Science of Seeing Differently, and also in many of his talks and lectures, “We don’t see reality – we only see what was useful to see in the past. But the nature of the brain’s delusional past is this: The past that determines how you see isn’t just constituted by your lived perceptions but by your imagined ones as well. As such, you can influence what you see in the future just by thinking.” And that’s what I hadn’t really used as a point of focus: why some people’s imaginations allow them to think differently and know the baby steps that, to the rest of us, look like giant leaps.

If I were going to pinpoint a single starting point for my change in focus, it would be around July 31, 2016. It was the Feast Day of Saint Ignatius of Loyola and the eve of the anniversary of the birth of Miss Maria Mitchell (and Mr. Herman Melville), and while listening to Justin Timberlake (ostensibly) quote Muhammad Ali to a bunch of teens, I thought, “What combination of things in someone’s past makes their will and determination so strong? What makes someone recognize that “Impossible is just a word…?”

“Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they’ve been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Impossible is not a fact. It’s an opinion.  Impossible is not a declaration. It’s a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary.

Impossible is nothing.”

– quoted from a 2004 Adidas ad campaign written by Aimee Lehto (with final tag line credited to Boyd Croyner), often attributed to Muhammad Ali

A version of the following was originally posted as “A Brother’s Love” on August 2, 2020.

“Given the conditions in this country to be a black writer was impossible. When I was young, people thought you were not so much wicked as sick, they gave up on you. My father didn’t think it was possible—he thought I’d get killed, get murdered. He said I was contesting the white man’s definitions, which was quite right.”

– James Baldwin, quoted from the interview “James Baldwin, The Art of Fiction No. 78” by Jordan Elgrably (printed in The Paris Review, Issue 91, Spring 1984)

Born today in Harlem, New York, in 1924, the author James Baldwin was – by his own words – an impossible person. His life (and career) were, in so many ways, shaped by a combination of history and opinions. First, there was the history of the United States. Then there were the opinions of his stepfather David Baldwin (who he referred to as his father), regarding life in general, plus his stepfather’s opinion of how the world would view him, how the world actually viewed him, and his own ideas about what was possible – or, what was necessary. He spent the ages of 14 – 17 following his father’s footsteps into the ministry and then, when his father died, he took a giant leap. He said, “Those were three years [preaching] which probably turned me to writing.”

Leaping into writing was not Mr. Baldwin’s only leap. He leapt across the pond to Paris, France, twice, even as his writing challenged Western society’s conceptions about race, class, gender, and sexuality. His essays, novels, and plays include Giovanni’s Room, Notes of a Native Son, The Fire Next Time, If Beale Street Could Talk (which was recently made into a movie) and the unfinished manuscript Remember This House (which was adapted to create the 2016 Academy Award-nominated documentary I Am Not Your Negro). Mr. Baldwin first went to Paris with $40 and not a lick of French. He was 24 years old, coming to grips with his sexuality, and escaping what he viewed – what he had witnessed – was a death sentence at the hands of American society.

“Not so metaphorically. Looking for a place to live. Looking for a job. You begin to doubt your judgment, you begin to doubt everything. You become imprecise. And that’s when you’re beginning to go under. You’ve been beaten, and it’s been deliberate. The whole society has decided to make you nothing. And they don’t even know they’re doing it.”

– James Baldwin, quoted from the interview “James Baldwin, The Art of Fiction No. 78” by Jordan Elgrably (printed in The Paris Review, Issue 91, Spring 1984)

From Paris, he was able to not only gain perspective about his experiences of being Black in America (and of being Black and Gay in America), but also to offer those experience back to the United States – in the form of a literary mirror. In words that very much echo Miss Maria Mitchell’s words, he said wanted to see himself, and be seen as, more than “merely a Negro; or, merely a Negro writer.”

In his late 30’s/early 40’s, Mr. Baldwin briefly returned to the United States and physically participated in the Civil Rights Movement and Gay Liberation Movement that he had (from Paris) helped to literally inspire. He became friends with Langston Hughes, Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, Medgar Evers, Lorraine Hansberry, Nikki Giovanni, and Nina Simone (who he and Mr. Hughes convinced to become active in the Civil Rights Movement). He worked with Drs. Kenneth and Mamie Clark, as well as Lena Horne and Miss Hansberry, to discuss the importance of civil rights legislation with President John F. Kennedy.

His friendships, however, were not only with Black artists and activists. He worked with his childhood friend Richard Avedon, marched with Marlon Brando and Charlton Heston, collaborated with Margaret Mead and Sol Stein, and also knew Rip Torn, Jean-Paul Sartre, and Dorothea Tanning. In fact, to read a biography or autobiography of James Baldwin is to read a Who’s Who of activism and artistry in the 20th century. But, you don’t have to settle for a reading a measly biography. If you can get your hands on the 1,884 pages of documents compiled by the FBI, you would be in for quite a treat.

Yes, you read that correctly. For a little over a decade, the FBI collected nearly two thousand pages worth of documents on a man that many Americans may not realize helped convince President Kennedy to send federal troops to defend the civil rights activists marching from Selma to Montgomery. True, it’s not the well-over 17,000 pages they compiled on Martin Luther King (not including the wire-tap documents). Here, however, is some perspective: the FBI only collected 276 pages on authors like Richard Wright (Native Son) and 110 pages on authors like Truman Capote (In Cold Blood) and Henry Miller (Tropic of Cancer). Additionally, FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover showed a particular interest in Mr. Baldwin and actually worked with agents to figure out ways they could ban Mr. Baldwin’s 1962 novel Another Country.

Perhaps Director Hoover was concerned about the fact that James Baldwin started the novel while living in Greenwich Village and continued as he moved back to Paris and then back to the States again, before ultimately finishing the book in Istanbul, Turkey. Perhaps he was concerned about the novels depictions of bisexuality, interracial relationships, and extramarital affairs. It’s just as likely that J. Edgar Hoover was concerned about James Baldwin’s persistent efforts to depict a deep, abiding, almost Divine, brotherly love; a universal experience of grace and growth that would make more things possible for more people. Whatever the FBI Director’s objections might have been, the report of the Justice Department’s General Crimes Section “concluded that the book contains literary merit and may be of value to students of psychology and social behavior.”

“The occurrence of an event is not the same thing as knowing what it is that one has lived through. Most people had not lived — nor could it, for that matter, be said that they had died– through any of their terrible events. They had simply been stunned by the hammer. They passed their lives thereafter in a kind of limbo of denied and unexamined pain. The great question that faced him this morning was whether or not he had ever, really, been present at his life.”

– quoted from Another Country by James Baldwin

I imagine one of the reasons people cling to their hates so stubbornly is because they sense, once hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain.

– quoted from The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin

When so many of his friends, who were also the leaders of the Civil Rights Movement, were killed, Mr. Baldwin made his second leap back to Paris. Again, it was a leap made out of fear and the basic desire to survive. His grief, anger, horror, and disappointment are all on full display in later works like If Beale Street Could Talk, Just Above My Head, and the 1985 non-fiction book  Evidence of Things Not Seen (about the Atlanta child murders). Yet, until his dying day he wrote about love and hope – even using a portion of the Epistle to the Hebrews, from the Christian New Testament, as the title of his book about the Atlanta child murders.

Another place where you can see Mr. Baldwin’s devotion to love, life, and humanity is in the words of his friends; people, who actually knew him, were inspired by him, and some of whom called him Jim or Jimmy. When he died in 1987, Maya Angelou wrote a tribute for The New York Times, entitled “James Baldwin: His Voice Remembered; Life In His Language.” In addition to describing how Mr. Baldwin introduced her to his family as his mother’s newest daughter, she explained that he “opened the [unusual] door” and encouraged her to tell her story.

“Well, the season was always Christmas with you there and, like one aspect of that scenario, you did not neglect to bring at least three gifts. You gave me a language to dwell in, a gift so perfect it seems my own invention….

The second gift was your courage, which you let us share: the courage of one who would go as a stranger in the village and transform the distances between people into intimacy with the whole world; courage to understand that experience in ways that made it a personal revelation for each of us…. Yours was the courage to live life in and from its belly as well as beyond its edges, to see and say what was, to recognize and identify evil, but never fear or stand in awe of it….

The third gift was hard to fathom and even harder to accept. It was your tenderness – a tenderness so delicate that I thought it could not last, but last it did and envelop me it did. In the midst of anger it tapped me lightly like the child in Tish’s womb…. Yours was a tenderness, of vulnerability, that asked everything, expected everything and, like the world’s own Merlin, provided us with the ways and means to deliver. I suppose that was why I was always a bit better behaved around you, smarter, more capable, wanting to be worth the love you lavished, and wanting to be steady enough to bear while it broke your heart, wanting to be generous enough to join your smile with one of my own, and reckless enough to jump on in that laugh you laughed. Because our joy and our laughter were not only all right, they were necessary.”

– quoted from  “James Baldwin: His Voice Remembered; Life In His Language” by Maya Angelou (printed in The New York Times Book Review December 20, 1987)

Please join me today (Wednesday, August 2nd) at 4:30 PM or 7:15 PM for a yoga practice on Zoom. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

Wednesday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “Langston’s Theme for Jimmy 2022”]

“I love America more than any other country in this world, and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.”

“Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within. I use the word love here not merely in the personal sense but as a state of being or a state of grace – not in the infantile American sense of being made happy but in the tough and universal sense of quest and daring and growth….Love is a growing up.”

– James Baldwin

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

### OPEN THE DOOR, & LET ME IN (OR OUT)! ###

Sitting in Grace & FTWMI: “A center of stillness surrounded by silence” July 29, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Books, Buddhism, Changing Perspectives, Dharma, Faith, Hope, Life, Meditation, Music, One Hoop, Pain, Peace, Philosophy, Suffering, Tragedy, Vipassana, Wisdom, Writing, Yoga.
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Peace, blessings, and stay hydrated!!!

For Those Who Missed It: This “missing” post for Saturday, July 29th was originally posted in 2020. It includes some updated links. How ever you define “grace,” it can be found in the fact that you can do this practice anywhere…. including at the United Nations. You can request an audio recording of either practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.

Check out the “Class Schedules” calendar for upcoming classes.)

“The more faithfully you listen to the voices within you, the better you will hear what is sounding inside.”

– quoted from Markings by Dag Hammerskjöld

Come into a comfortable seated position. You can sit on the floor, your bed, a chair, or a cushion. You can sit on a bench, a stool, or a rock. You can kneel on the floor, a cushion, or a prie-dieu. You can lie down if you must, but make sure you are in a comfortable and stable position, with your back long and your jaw and shoulders relaxed. Let one or both hands rest so that your belly can soften into your hands. Close your eyes, if that is comfortable to you, and do that 90-second thing.

Today, really pay attention to how the soft belly rises and falls and the breath enters and leaves your body. Today, notice the temporal nature of things – how, like your breath, everything begins and ends; changes. Notice how the inhale causes the exhale and how the exhale causes the inhale. Notice any suffering, discomfort, or dis-ease you may be experiencing; and note or name your mental, physical, and emotional experiences, but without commenting or creating a story around the experiences.

Just breathe, with awareness.

This is a specific kind of meditation, meditation that arouses mindfulness.

Vipassanā literally means “to see in a special way” and is often translated into English as “insight.” It is a meditation style/technique, within Theraveda Buddhism, that has also become a tradition (meaning there are people who practice vipassanā, but no other aspects of Buddhism). The original practice, which includes the practice of satipaţţhāna (which is often translated as the “foundation of mindfulness”), was popularized by Mahāsī Sayādaw.

Born today in 1904, Mahāsī Sayādaw was a Burmese Theraveda Buddhist monk. He became a novice at 12 years old, was ordained at age twenty, and earned his degree as a teacher of dhamma in 1941. Upon his ordination, he assumed the name Mahāsī Sayādaw U Sobhana. In his mid-30s, he began teaching the technique of vipassanā in his home village, which was named for a massive drum (known as Mahāsī). He was eventually asked, by the Prime Minister of Burma (in what is now Myanmar), to be a resident teacher in the capital and then to help establish meditation centers throughout Burma (Myanmar), Sri Lanka, Indonesia, and Thailand. By his late 60’s, Mahāsī Sayādaw had trained over 700,000 meditators and by his mid-70’s he was traveling to the West to lead meditation retreats. One of the places where he led retreats was the Insight Meditation Society (IMS), which is now one of the leading meditation centers in the United States.

“We are not permitted to choose the frame of our destiny. But what we put into it is ours.”

– quoted from Markings by Dag Hammerskjöld

One of the great things about practicing vipassanā is that you can practice it anywhere. (You can even practice it standing or walking, even though I didn’t include those options at the beginning.) You can even practice at the United Nations Headquarters in “A Room of Quiet” that was established and designed by a team lead by Dag Hammerskjöld (b. 1905).

“Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for.”

– quoted from Markings by Dag Hammerskjöld

Born today in Sweden, exactly a year after Mahāsī Sayādaw, Hammerskjöld was the second Secretary General of the United Nations and the youngest person to ever hold the position. His second term was cut short when he was killed in an airplane as he traveled to the Congo to broker peace during the Congo Crisis. President John F. Kennedy called him “the greatest statesman of our century” and, he was posthumously awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. In fact, he is the only person to be posthumously awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. After his death, his journal was discovered and published as Värmärken (Markings, or Waymarks in English). The journal starts when Hammerskjöld was 20 years old and continues up until the month before his death.

Even though he thought the journalist who called him for a comment about his appointment to the UN was actually part of an April Fool’s joke, Hammerskjöld was pretty serious about peace. Peace on the inside and peace on the outside. That is why he was so dedicated to the UN’s Meditation Room being “a room of quiet” for all, without the trappings or outward appearance of any particular faith, creed, or religious belief. He led an interfaith group of Christians, Jews, and Muslims who combined their physical and mental efforts as well as financial resources – and he was very hands on. He not only had a hand in the painting, sculpture, and architecture of the room, but also in the fact that there are benches instead of chairs. He even, quite literally, had a hand in the carpet that was laid on the floor and the color that was painted on the walls. He wrote in letters and is quoted in interviews as saying that “This House” (which is how he referenced the UN) “should have one room dedicated to silence in the outward sense and stillness in the inner sense.” He indicated that this silence and stillness was something everyone carried within them and that his aim was “to create in this small room a place where the doors may be open to the infinite lands of thought and prayer.”

Go back to the beginning and do that 90-minute thing. This time, as you sit here and breathe here, noting your experience here, consider that all over the world there are people sitting and breathing, meditating and praying, opening to that same “center of stillness surrounded by silence” that you are opening to within yourself.

“The longest journey is the journey inwards.”

– quoted from Markings by Dag Hammerskjöld

We want to bring back, in this room, the stillness which we have lost in our streets, and in our conference rooms, and to bring it back in a setting in which no noise would impinge on our imagination.

– Journalist Pauline Frederick quoting Dag Hammerskjöld (in an interview for the UN Oral History Collection dated June 20, 1986)

The 2023 playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “07292023 Still Breathing, Noting, Here & at the UN”]

The 2020 playlist is also available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “07292020 Breathing, Noting, Here & at the UN”]

“Thou who art over us,

Thou who art one of us,

Thou who art –

Also within us,

May all see Thee – in me also,

May I prepare the way for Thee,

May I thank Thee for all that shall fall to my lot,

May I also not forget the needs of others,

Keep me in Thy love

As Thou wouldst that all should be kept in mine.

May everything in this my being be directed to Thy glory

And may I never despair.

For I am under Thy hand,

And in Thee is all power and goodness.

Give me a pure heart – that I may see Thee,

A humble heart – that I may hear Thee,

A heart of love – that I may serve Thee,

A heart of faith – that I may abide in Thee. Amen”

– prayer/meditation/poem from Markings by Dag Hammerskjöld

### PEACE IN, PEACE OUT ###

More Like Birds & Trees (the “missing” Tuesday post) July 26, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in Books, Buddhism, Changing Perspectives, Confessions, Daoism, Depression, Gratitude, Healing Stories, Health, Hope, Life, Maya Angelou, Meditation, Music, One Hoop, Pain, Pema Chodron, Philosophy, Poetry, Science, Suffering, Taoism, Traditional Chinese Medicine, Twin Cities, Wisdom, Writing, Yin Yoga, Yoga.
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Stay hydrated, y’all, and “may our hearts be open!”

This is a “missing” post for Tuesday, July 25th. NOTE: Some links direct to sites outside of this blog. You can request an audio recording of either practice via a comment below or (for a slightly faster reply) you can email myra (at) ajoyfulpractice.com.

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.

Check out the “Class Schedules” calendar for upcoming classes.)

“When we suffer, we tend to think that suffering is all there is at that moment, and happiness belongs to some other time or place.

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

How are you doing today?

Seriously. I really want know how you’re feeling and how you’re doing today.

I’m asking because I care.

I’m also asking because, in order to answer (honestly), you have to check in with yourself – and that’s an important part of the practice.

My personal practice includes this blog, my class notes (a. k. a. the notebooks full of hieroglyphics), videos and playlists, and my personal journals. All of those bits and pieces of the process give me the ability to look back and notice how the ways I’m feeling change: from one moment/day/week/month/year to the next. Nestled together are big changes and little changes that I might have missed if I didn’t have this type of practice. There are instances where I find myself experiencing the same things around the same time of year (or month). Similarly, there are times when an emotion/sensation that was simmering in the background comes to a boil.

Then, there are times when something like anger is still present, but no longer carries the same charge.

“Anger is a mental, psychological phenomenon, yet it is closely linked to biological and biochemical elements. Anger makes you tense your muscles, but when you know how to smile, you begin to relax and your anger will decrease. Smiling allows the energy of mindfulness to be born in you, helping you to embrace your anger.”

― quoted from “Two – Putting Out the Fire of Anger: Tools for Cooling the Flames” in Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh

A couple of years ago, I was contemplating anger, because it was everywhere. As I do, I turned to my practice, which included a bit of history and the wisdom of teachers like Thích Nhất Hạnh and Pema Chödrön. I noted that external factors, like the “great heat, major heat”, can affect our emotions. I even dived into the tropes and stereotypes around “angry Black women” and I touched on the flip side of that – people thinking I shouldn’t feel strong emotions because I practice yoga and meditation. That last part is something that some men in certain cultures have also had to deal with because of tropes and stereotypes related to their gender and emotions.

I also mentioned how eastern philosophies and their medical sciences – like Daoism and Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) and Yoga and Ayurveda – view every emotion as an energetic experience (as well as a mental, psychological, physiological, biological, and biochemical experience) whereby energy is either in-balance or out-of-balance. Finally, I outlined some steps any one of us can take in order to move into balance. Keep in mind, as Dr. Beau Lotto pointed out, that what may seem like a baby step to me, may feel like a giant leap to you (and vice versa).

The thing is, all of the anger that I referenced, in 2021, is still present. For some people, it has even been magnified. However, anger is no longer on the top of the list of the things I’m feeling. Instead, I’m a little weary… and tired of the shenanigans that previously made me so angry. This feeling is something that I brought up this time last year, in a “9 Days” video* inspired by a map (that a little kid gave me back in 2008) and a Dermot Kennedy song.

“My sense of wonder’s just a little tired”

― quoted from the song “Lost” by Dermot Kennedy, co-written by Carey Willetts

Considering our emotional experiences from an energetic standpoint may help us accept our emotions as natural (which they are) – even if we don’t believe in the traditional sciences. First, they give us a place to start; a first and second step if you will. The eastern philosophies and their sister sciences can be useful processing paradigms, because every energetic experience has an opposite reaction (as well as what we can consider a near-peer) and we are encouraged to cultivate the opposites (when we are out of balance). As I mentioned on Sunday and Monday, heart (YIN) and small intestine (YANG) meridians have several associations, including joy (when in-balance) versus anxiety (when out-of-balance). The other big emotion pairs (based on Yin Yoga) include:

  • Anger and Frustration versus Kindness/Lovingkindness
  • Worry versus Peace, Faith, and Acceptance (or Trustful Surrender)
  • Grief and Sorrow versus Courage, Resilience, Tenacity (balanced with non-attachment), and Reverence
  • Fear versus Wisdom

Consider, for a moment, how your emotions shift when you are feeling angry and/or frustrated and then do something kind (for yourself and/or for someone else). Consider, also, what happens when cultivating a moment of peace/acceptance enables you to let go of a worry. Maybe, in that moment, of trustful surrender you find the wisdom inside of yourself that alleviates some fear.

Years ago, in a meditation group, my dharma and yoga buddy Lenice dropped a little wisdom during a particularly harsh winter: What if we were more like the trees? Think about it, as long as they are alive, they grow and blossom and let go of the things that no longer serve them. In the essay, “Africa,” published in the collection Even the Stars Look Lonesome, Maya Angelou wrote about trauma and stated, “An African proverb spells out the truth: ‘The ax forgets. The tree remembers.’” Another way to think about that is: the tree remembers it’s trauma, but keeps living; keeps blossoming and growing; keeps letting go of what no longer serves it.

Of course, Dr. Angelou and Victor Hugo also remind us that we are (or can be) like birds – and, sometimes the practice just comes down to knowing what we need in order to blossom, grow, sing, and let go of what no longer serves us.

“Be like the bird, who
Halting in his flight
On limb too slight
Feels it give way beneath him,
Yet sings
Knowing he hath wings.”

– quoted from the poem “Be Like the Bird” by Victor Hugo

NOTE: In Abbie Betinis’s musical composition (which is on the playlists), “she” has wings.

Again, you might be having a moment where some (or all) of this feels like giant leaps. And, that’s OK. Maybe it’s too much to think about smiling, blossoming, singing, and flying. Maybe you just need to focus on the breathing! The key is to find the thing that makes sense for you in this moment.

Then, when it makes sense, consider what seems like the next logical step, given where you are and how you’re feeling. Maybe, what you need is a different perspective; so, you reach out to a friend or a professional. I recently heard of a new app, called “White Flag,” that cultivates peer-to-peer support. (Full disclosure, I haven’t checked it out or investigated it much, but I’ve heard good things.) Maybe what you need is to go back to that first step and breathe some more.

Maybe what you need is more movement or maybe less movement (depending on the weather). Maybe you don’t wanna move today (and there’s now a video on the Carry app for that). Either way, keep in mind that, as Sarah Powers pointed out in Insight Yoga: An innovative synthesis of traditional yoga, meditation, and Eastern approaches to healing and well-being, “All emotions associated with the organs are considered natural responses to life. Yet when they become compulsive or prolonged, they become injurious to our overall health.”

“If we can learn to see and skillfully engage with both the presence of happiness and the presence of suffering, we will go in the direction of enjoying life more. Every day we go a little farther in that direction, and eventually we realize that suffering and happiness are not two separate things.

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

So, how are you doing, in this moment?

While I hope you are doing well, I also recognize that you may be, simultaneously, feeling a certain kind of way about things and that you might label some of those ways as “not so well” and/or “not so good.” You might even be having one of the moments/days/weeks/months/years/lifetimes that you would describe as “mostly good.”

Or, maybe in this moment, you’re “good” and you’re taking everything a moment at a time.

I see all that. I care about that. May you be where you need to be; “[going] in the direction of enjoying life more;” moving towards your experience of happiness – whether that experience is an ecstatic kind of joy, not being miserable, or somewhere in between.

“Happiness is possible right now, today―but happiness cannot be without suffering. Some people think that in order to be happy they must avoid all suffering, so they are constantly vigilant, constantly worrying. They end up sacrificing all their spontaneity, freedom, and joy. This isn’t correct. If you can recognize and accept your pain without running away from it, you will discover that although pain is there, joy can also be there at the same time.

― quoted from from “1. The Art of Transforming Suffering: Suffering and Happiness are not Separate” in No Mud, No Lotus by Thich Nhat Hanh

Due to technical difficulties, we used two different set of playlists for this practice. The evening playlist is the one specifically mixed for this date.

Tuesday afternoon’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “04102021 Si se puede & Birds”]

Tuesday evening’s playlist is also available on YouTube and Spotify.

NOTE: The evening playlist on YouTube contains additional videos. I was not aware of this “Birdsong” when I made the playlist, so it is not (currently) included on either format.

“Each morning I offer a stick of incense to the Buddha. I promise myself that I will enjoy every minute of the day that is given me to live.”

― quoted from “Five – Compassionate Communication: Nourishing Ourselves” in Anger: Wisdom for Cooling the Flames by Thich Nhat Hanh

*That aforementioned 9 Days” video

If you are thinking about suicide, worried about a friend or loved one, or would like emotional support, you can dial 988 (in the US) or call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. You can also call this TALK line if you are struggling with addiction or involved in an abusive relationship. The Lifeline network is free, confidential, and available to all 24/7. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING.

During the practice, I mention a new app (White Flag), which I have not researched, but which may be helpful if you need (non-professional) support.

If you are a young person in crisis, feeling suicidal, or in need of a safe and judgement-free place to talk, you can also click here to contact the TrevorLifeline (which is staffed 24/7 with trained counselors).

### NOTICE HOW WHAT YOU’RE FEELING CHANGES ###

FTWMI: Contemplating Death, Dying, and All the Living in Between July 8, 2023

Posted by ajoyfulpractice in "Impossible" People, Books, Changing Perspectives, Faith, Healing Stories, Health, Hope, Life, One Hoop, Pain, Peace, Philosophy, Science, Suffering, Tragedy, Vairagya, Wisdom, Women, Writing.
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Peace and blessings to all!

For Those Who Missed It: The following was originally posted today in 2020. Class details have been updated.

“If we could raise one generation with unconditional love, there would be no Hitlers. We need to teach the next generation of children from Day One that they are responsible for their lives. Mankind’s greatest gift, also its greatest curse, is that we have free choice. We can make our choices built from love or from fear.”

– Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D.

“I cannot leave out the problem of life and death. Many young people and others have come out to serve others and to labor for peace, through their love for all who are suffering. They are always mindful of the fact that the most important question is the question of life and death, but often not realizing that life and death are but two faces of one reality. Once we realize that we will have the courage to encounter both of them….

Now I see that if one doesn’t know how to die, one can hardly know how to live—because death is a part of life.”

– quoted from The Miracle of Mindfulness: An Introduction to the Practice of Meditation by Thích Nhất Hạnh

Today’s post and class will be tricky for some. Today’s theme is always tricky for some. Although, I would assert that it shouldn’t be. After all, death is part of life. That can come off glib and easy to say – specifically because it is a little glib, or shallow, because it belies the fact that loss is hard and that most of us haven’t/don’t really face the concept of death until we (or someone we love) is dying. The statement “death is part of life” is also shallow because it belies the fact that, even if we meditate on and prepare for death, loss is still hard. Yes, death and dying are something that we all have to deal with, but to just leave it at that is what makes the subject tricky. We have to, as Thích Nhất Hạnh instructs in The Miracle of Mindfulness, go deeper.

“The five stages – denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance – are a part of the framework that makes up our learning to live with the one[s] we lost. They are tools to help us frame and identify what we may be feeling. But they are not stops on some linear timeline in grief. Not everyone goes through all of them or goes in a prescribed order.”

– quoted from On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Grief by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler

Born in Zürich, Switzerland today in 1926, Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was the oldest triplet in a family of Protestant Christians. Despite her father’s wishes, she grew up to be a psychiatrist known for her work on death and dying, life and death, and the five stages of grief. Her ultimate work was in part inspired by her work with refugees in Zürich during World War II. After the war, she participated in relief efforts in Poland and, at some point, visited the Maidanek concentration camp in Poland. As a young woman, standing in a place of destruction, she was struck by the compassion and human resilience that would inspire someone to carve hundreds of butterflies into the walls of the death camp.

Dr. Kübler-Ross originally planned on being a pediatrician. However, she married a fellow medical student (in New York in 1958) and became pregnant. The pregnancy resulted in the loss of her pediatrics residency, so she switched to psychiatry. Unfortunately, she also suffered two miscarriages before giving birth to two children. The loss of her residency and her miscarriages were not her first (or last) experiences with loss. Her marriage ended in divorce and, when she attempted to build a Virginia hospice for infants and children with HIV/AIDS, someone set fire to her home (in 1994). The house and all of the belongings inside were lost to arson.

When she started her psychiatry residency, Dr. Kübler-Ross was struck by the way hospitals in the United States treated patients who were dying. She began to host lectures where medical students were forced to meet and listen to dying people outside of a clinical setting. Her intention was to get medical students to “[react] like human beings instead of scientists…and be able to treat [terminal patients] with compassion the same compassion that you would want for yourself.” As she moved through her career, she continued hosting the series of seminars which used interviews with terminally ill patients. Her work was met with both praise and criticism – most of the latter was because she was so obviously questioning the traditional practices of psychiatry. In 1969, she released her seminal book On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families, which provided a grief model for people who were dying and for those they were leaving behind.

“Those who have the strength and the love to sit with a dying patient in the silence that goes beyond words will know that this moment is neither frightening nor painful, but a peaceful cessation of the functioning of the body.”

– quoted from On Death and Dying: What the Dying Have to Teach Doctors, Nurses, Clergy and Their Own Families by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Dr. Kübler-Ross explained from the beginning that her outline was not intended to be linear and yet, people wanted to be able to step through the stages with grace and ease. The problem with that mindset is… life is messy and so is grieving. A perfect example of the messiness of life and death can be found in Dr. Kübler-Ross’s own life… and death. In 1995, after a series of strokes which left her partially paralyzed on her left side, she found herself confronted with the reality of her own death. Added to her grief was the closing of Shanti Nilaya (“Final Home of Peace”), a healing and growth center which she had established in the later 1970’s (shortly before her divorce) after convincing her husband to buy 40-acres of land in Escondido, California.

Despite a 2002 interview with The Arizona Republic, where she stated that she was ready to die, Dr, Kübler-Ross struggled with the fact that she could not choose her own time of death. He son Ken, Founder and President of the Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Foundation, served as her caregiver for the last decade of her life. In a 2019 interview with the hosts of ABC Radio’s Life Matters, Ken said, “A few weeks before she passed she said to me, ‘Kenneth, I don’t want to die.’”

“It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we’re alive – to release our inner selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade designed to conform to external definitions of who and what we are.”

– quoted from Death: The Final Stage of Growth by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Ken Ross admitted that he was taken aback by his mother’s statement that she did not want to die. It turned out, Dr. Kübler-Ross was not only physically paralyzed; she was also stuck in the anger stage of her own grief model. She caught flak in the media – as if she were somehow above being human simply because she had studied, taught, and spoken so openly and so frequently on the subject of death and dying. She did not stay there (in the anger stage), however, as her family and friends encouraged her to keep living and to keep processing the experience of dying. Her son even literally pushed her out of her comfort zone by assisting her in wheelchair marathons and in visiting her sisters in Europe.

“[She] let herself be loved and taken care of, then that was her final lesson — and then she was allowed to graduate. For years I thought about this and what I realized was that’s exactly what she teaches. [When] you learn your lessons you’re allowed to graduate.”

– Ken Ross in a 2019 “Life Matters” interview on ABC Radio National

“In Switzerland I was educated in line with the basic premise: work, work, work. You are only a valuable human being if you work. This is utterly wrong. Half working, half dancing – that is the right mixture. I myself have danced and played too little.”

– Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D. in an interview

Please join me for a 90-minute virtual yoga practice on Zoom today (Saturday, July 8th) at 12:00 PM. Use the link from the “Class Schedules” calendar if you run into any problems checking into the class. You can request an audio recording of this practice via a comment below or by emailing myra (at) a joyfulpractice.com

Saturday’s playlist is available on YouTube and Spotify. [Look for “07082020 On Death & Dying”]

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”

“Strange though it may seem to you, one of the most productive avenues for growth is found through the study and experience of death. Perhaps death reminds us that our time is limited and that we’d better accomplish our purpose here on earth before our time runs out. Whatever the reason….Those who have been immersed in the tragedy of massive death during wartime, and who have faced it squarely, never allowing their senses and feelings to become numbed and indifferent, have emerged from their experiences with growth and humanness greater than that achieved through almost any other means.”

– quoted from Death: The Final Stage of Growth by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

In the spirit of generosity (“dana”), the Zoom classes, recordings, and blog posts are freely given and freely received. If you are able to support these teachings, please do so as your heart moves you. (NOTE: You can donate even if you are “attending” a practice that is not designated as a “Common Ground Meditation Center” practice, or you can purchase class(es). Donations are tax deductible; class purchases are not necessarily deductible.)

Check out the “Class Schedules” calendar for upcoming classes.

Revised 07/08/2023.

### “People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.” EKR ###